Welcome to everyone joining Bluesky from twitter. Someone will be assigned to you to misunderstand one of your jokes and scream at you shortly.

Jesse Welles is the musical artist we need right now youtu.be/El0CLduLgew?...

Liverpool announcing a partnership with a fashion brand on the morning of the day they’re almost certainly going to get humped by the team that is almost certainly going to take their title as Premier League champions is, I’m going to say, not great optics.

Just heard an AI ethicist talk about how important it is that we say ‘MEN are using Grok to undress images of babies, children and women’ not ‘Grok is….’. Grok isn’t responsible for the action, the men enabling & using it for this repulsive purpose are. Small but important bit of linguistic accuracy

I came here to post exactly this quote, but it's good to see from the Dems.

What the US did in Venezuela was wrong, dangerous and illegal. It should never have happened and there should be major consequences. But... if it leads to Iranians overthrowing their regime, that will definitely be a good thing. Both things can be true. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

ITV Executive: "I have an idea for a new game show. We bring one back which was big in the 80s or 90s" ITV Programme Controller: "It's a huge risk, it's never been done before. I mean, who can we get to replace the original iconic host?"...

Why, when you take down all yourChristmas decorations, does it feel like you just gained 100 sq. feet of living space? And why are you certain you used to have more furniture?

Literally a publication for eight-year olds 40 years ago

The snow in Aberdeen is almost the height of a miniature dachshund

Basically.

It never really ends...

My friends in Austria sent this and I can't stop watching...wait for the end. 🤗💜

If the rest of the world was in any doubt as to the intentions of the current administration of our sometime ally and hitherto supposed partner in the cause of freedom and democracy, here they are spelling it out in words even a child could understand.

I have a foldable phone, and I will not be downloading this under any circumstances share.google/lhaJPnRGmJ0a...

"The United States can project our will anywhere, any time" - The United States Defence Secretary Pete Hegseth earlier today. Not defend democracy. Not keep the world safe. Not protect innocent people. "Project our will" 1/5

I feel for all those pet owners who have animals currently terrified of New Year fireworks. I, however, have two dachshunds who want to go and watch them. This line in a Guardian piece about a sausage dog who survived 15 months lost in the Australian bush is so, so accurate.

Happy arbitrarily chosen point at which to mark another orbit of our nearest star. I hope the next orbit is an enjoyable one.

🚨 IMPORTANT: If you begin playing In The Night Garden Series 1 Episode 14 at exactly 11:42:02 PM then the Pinky Ponk will crash into a tree at exactly midnight. Start the new year off right.

🎶Why do bards suddenly appear, Ev’ry time you are near? Just like me They long to be Or not to be Close to yooooooou🎶

I have waited at pedestrian crossings alongside, on separate occasions, Paul Merson, Wayne Sleep and @watsoncomedian.bsky.social without speaking with any of them. Just like pretty much everyone else I've waited next to at pedestrian crossings.

Sheeeeeiiiiit! The Most famous @stenhousemuirfc.com fan has left the building.

Rebecca Black Sabbath

At least everyone in the Arsenal dressing room will know whose vest it is

To be fair, I didn't realise Bardot had gone full-on fash until after she'd died either

Tomorrow marks 10 years since the greatest piece of art of our generation

I just can't...

Yeah, same Wordle 1,652 6/6 ⬛⬛⬛⬛🟨 🟨🟨🟨⬛⬛ ⬛🟩🟩🟩🟩 ⬛🟩🟩🟩🟩 ⬛🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Benny Johnson is a hate preacher, plain and simple

Our dogs enjoyed their Christmas walk yesterday

I've said it many times, but we need to come to terms with the fact that whilst the USA are historical allies to those of us in the UK, under the Trump administration they very much are not.

Replace "military industrial complex" with "deep state" or "woke liberal elite" and you'll see just how insane this really is. Not to mention an insult to hard working, dedicated and passionate educators everywhere.

12YO girl signed up to do “stand up comedy” at the talent show. 13YO boy decided to heckle her. Teacher started to tell the boy to leave her alone, but the 12YO comedian said “no, no, let him go, this is the closest he’s ever going to get to having a conversation with a girl.”

Merry Christmas. Please enjoy the best text I've ever received.

Happy Christmas. True story. There was a lad in my class at school called Mark Singh who we used to call The Herald Angel.

and indeed merry christmas to *all* the group chats, everywhere

i post this story every christmas, and will keep doing so until it stops making me cry merry christmas xx

Pope Leo said in a Christmas Eve sermon that the story of Jesus being born in a stable because there was no room at an inn should remind Christians that refusing to help the poor and strangers today is tantamount to rejecting God himself. For @reuters.com

WHAT DAY IS IT

All services done, time for #clergymaltclub Well done and a merry Christmas to all my fellow club members

Counterpoint - He knows exactly how it works, but he thinks the Fox News audience won't know.

I have never actually looked at the NORAD Santa tracker and I just looked and it's so cute and now I'm crying Rudolph at the front 😭

Your annual reminder that if you get this cracker joke and are confused by it, it's apparently because "ffi" is a special character in some fonts and when the typeface is changed to one that doesn't have it, those letters disappear. It's supposed to be "coffin medicine".

One day @primaryteachermary.bsky.social will get to eat her dinner in peace

The graduate TA who set the paper has been fired for marking her too harshly, even though her own description of the work she put in makes her lucky to have got 0%

This is as easy a test of your belief in the American system as is conceivable: Should this be an acceptable argument from a president?

As is customary on December 23rd (by @paulandstorm.bsky.social) m.youtube.com/watch?v=JVpg...

I think it’s good for the Kansas City Chiefs that they’re moving from Missouri to Kansas. It’ll be the longest drive they’ve had in recent memory.