First wedding cake complete! Now just to get it to the venue in one piece tomorrow 😬

As the adage goes, I had an excess of de-zested lemons so I made some lemonade.

Can we stop using the term 'commit' suicide. It's a hangover from when it was a crime and actually creates a stigma for survivors and family/friends. Also, a hunger strike is a form of protest, not a slow and unusual way to take your own life.

The wedding cake supplies have arrived.

Tried to login to a training portal - no option to reset or request my password apart from using the AI assistant and this was the sum of all the help provided. Brilliant. 10/10. So fucking helpful.

Uhhhh, Mum?!

I did 18 years in social care I've done a lot of weird things. I did a day modeling wedding dresses when I was 15, which is a bit weird.

I heard a noise- Clarence found the recycling pile

As someone who has a relative with FLD and supported people with it - go fuck yourself John you absolute gobshite.

Skill issue - this was my 40th birthday. I'm nearly 3 years into my 40s and they have been the best so far.

Clarence is enjoying an unusual hurkle-durkle today

Back at work today, treating myself to a lunchtime lie down in bed. It's so cold!

Also passes the taste test

Wedding cake test number 2 was a lot more successful

Second attempt at my friends wedding cake, this one is definitely better than the last one. Just need to add some decorations tomorrow!

Said hi to Mark Owen at Manchester Paper Chase. I handed Paul Kaye some dining room chairs. I probably caused David O'Doherty some alarm a few years ago at Edinburgh fringe when I kept seeing him and saying his name loudly (we play celeb spotting but I need to lower my voice 💀)

You’ve just opened a Star Trek themed restaurant. What are you calling it? The Trouble with Nibbles (cat cafe)

Just received my first Happy New Year and had to double check the date. I've only been off work since the 23rd, time has lost all meaning.

Little baby Jesus getting hammered on communion wine, screaming 'I'm the fucking Sacred Heart, big man, this is MY house!'.

Clarence's favourite Christmas tradition - climbing into a paper crown. First christmas (2019) And today

Another ukelele

Father Catmas has been everyone!!

The new Wallace and Gromit is a bit dark...

When I worked as a GP receptionist (boo, hiss!). There was a tiny man in his late 80s who was in poor health who came in a couple of times a week. Every single time he said 'you're just like sunshine' and he would say it with a big smile. Being pleasant, patient and friendly costs nothing.

Clarence woke me up at 5am trying to drag me out of bed by the scruff of my neck. But what happened in reality, because I am not in fact, a cat, is he bit into the back of my neck and top, and then ate a little bit of my top. And he'd do it again.

Spice mix night

Wigan's gone a bit downhill but that's a bit harsh, auntie beeb

RIP Chris Rea, I am not looking forward to the inevitable him driving 'home' to heaven pictures, probably with Paddington too, the sick fuck.

Post a picture you've taken of a cow. If you've no cows in your gallery, that's your 2026 challenge. Highland coo on Conic Hill.

Clarence has decided I shouldn't be working and will not move from in front of my laptop. I guess that means I need to finish for the day?

Oh your cat is spoiled? Are they playing 'Mr Sandman' on the kalimba to them whilst they go to sleep, spoiled?

Same, cockatoo, same.

Just saw someone gushing over being gifted a 'vintage edition' of Dracula that was published in the year of our lord 2003 by Barnes and Noble. So what's the oldest book you own? Mine is this - published in 1905 and I have some HG Wells published in 1925.

I reckon we could convince the tech bros and billionaires to do a death match to find out who the biggest bro is. They believe in all that alpha nonsense, right?

I've sorted through my baking cupboard and made a spreadsheet of its contents, for fun 😎

I'm going to spend this afternoon clearing out the fridge and all the kitchen cupboards before The Big Shop™️ arrives on Tuesday. Merry Christmas everyone!

Clarence has somehow managed to take over both of our pillows this morning. Happy caturday!

Good evening from Clarence

Finally finished the last of the Christmas shopping

I fucking love Fern Brady

I love that us Wiganers decided collectively to get really into pies to try and convince people that's why we are called 'pie eaters'

Welcome to my Mum's flat, the temperature is always at least 26°c, you will make your own drinks, hers and for any guest. There'll be at least 3 different types of milk in, for no apparent reason. If you want coffee, she's mixed three different types of freezedried together. But there is chocolate.

Off to Transylvania it seems.

BBC News - Parents of sextortion victim sue Instagram owner Meta www.bbc.co.uk/news/article... Good luck to them. RIP Murray.

Great idea, let's put children with sensory issues, mobility issues etc in big, hard to adapt and heat buildings rather than you know, fund schools properly? I'm not the biggest advocate for mainstream education for all children but christ on a bike. And how is this funded?

She is definitely nipping Terry's bum in this.

If Max Miller from Tasting History turns out to be a wrong 'un I'm going to cry. I hate how baking is so trad coded.

The inspiration board had photos of Jeremy Vine, Clarkson and 90s Elton John. I can almost feel the itch of the polyester.

💀

I forgot I caught a nice sunset earlier.