if you see this, we IMPLORE you to post a picture from whatever device you're using without explanation

She Van on my.... Nevermind. Happy 100th Birthday, Sir.

So a raccoon breaks into a liquor store, gets wasted, and has to be removed by the authorities, and it's a cute news story all day everywhere around the world. But when I do it...! 🤬

[P] he has slipped the surly bonds of Earth / and shot the face of God

Dick Cheney Was Doing War Crimes in Exactly the Right Way, by Ezra Klein.

I love her

Republicans hating capitalism part....a million. 🤷

When autism is constantly framed as a problem to be ‘solved’ some may start to believe they are a problem, that belief can scar, language matters Representation matters We don’t need fixing we need support & if you don’t want to support leave us the fuck alone 👌🏽 ♾️

Polsby does an exceptional job of covering how Congress changed from the 30s to 90s, particularly the reform fights in the 50s congresses that are basically totally forgotten about

Oligarchy is thriving.

Fashalashadingdongs. Is this anything?

2010: I'm going to a foreign country. What vaccines do I need to get beforehand? 2025: I'm going to a foreign country. What vaccines should I get while I'm there?

Born to write smut. Cursed to doom scroll the apocalypse.

Rose garden club. We're going to keep on dancing at the Rose garden club.

Somebody has to say it: None of the butts in Sir Mix-a-lot's video were even that big.

More people should call this grifter out right to his fucking face. Good for Ms. Hunt. 👍🤌

Future headline: "Why Did the President Die? He had become too woke."

It's my birthday weekend, so I'm going to take a nap. Don't disturb except for emergencies or really really good news. 😉

We're going to need at least one Democratic candidate for prez 2028 who won't throw Trans people under the bus. They'll get my endorsement.

LoL the way it skips LBJ but some of the faces kinda look like him anyway.

"Get Out!" "Us?" "Nope. Him."

If you remember these commercials, get your colonoscopy scheduled.

I’m not great at photoshopping two images together with the free app i have but i certainly try

I can see them trying this. Like, they'll say that the Texas ones are for a good reason but the Cali ones are revenge and that's not a good reason.

Ooooweee

“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” — FDR “Ask not what your country can do for you—ask what you can do for your country.” — JFK “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!” — Ronald Reagan “The windmills are driving the whales loco.” — Donald J “for Genius” Trump

"Your Soul is Free, but Your A$$ Belongs to Me" How mind/body dualism has supported oppressive social structures from antiquity to the present day. In this essay I will...

In a world where almost everyone practices ethical non-monogamy, two rival polycules, among the largest and most powerful in existence, vie for domination. Two young people, born into these polycules, meet and fall in love. Will their union result in lasting peace, or is it doomed to end tragically?

First they came for Chuck E. Cheese

I wish I only thought there was monsters on the world for 50 seconds. Must be nice.

ATTN: If you're one of the Treasury employees that handled Epstein's Suspicious Activity Reports, feel free to reach out to me via signal (in my bio). I’ll keep you anonymous- as I have the thousands of current and former federal workers who have sent me tips. Please share this widely. 🙏🏻

"Imma eat this whole thing."

ATTN: If you’re one of the 1,000 FBI agents who reviewed the Epstein files, feel free to reach out to me via signal (in my bio). I’ll keep you anonymous- as I have the thousands of current and former federal workers who have sent me tips. Please share this widely. 🙏🏻

Polonius invented the Weave. Trump just stole it and he doesn't even do it right.

The existence of a road to Emmaus and a road to Damascus as spiritual experiences implies the existence of roads to Emmascus and Damaus. In this essay I will...

I love it when a dog is just smart enough to be really dumb.

The waters of Rivendell always run clear, if you know what I mean.

I’m petrified about today’s science news. Genetically modifying crabs to have cheetah genes? This could go sideways fast.

Raccoon checking us out to see if we're safe. (Brought the family by after, so I guess we pass muster.)

We keep things interesting in this household.

This is what you look like BTW.

“Riley Gaines weighs in on NYC mayoral primary” jesus christ lady you tied for fifth in one race shut the fuck up already

Sometimes I just feel like that guy in the meme. You know the one.

Emit a tale woven one vowel at a time. #palindrome

kristi noem as porta potties: thread

Hm. At some point we're going to have to tell rich people that they're doing fine and everyone else needs some resources too. The sooner the better for all of us.

Honestly I still can’t stop laughing 😂😅🤣

Count Dooku is short for Count Douche Canoe.