Texas, here I come!

I’m excited to see where the white house puts the slip n slide to finish off their white trash lawn

Texas, here I come!

I worked as a lifeguard and swim instructor for three years in my teens. This is spot on. Non-paywalled version gcaptain.com/drowning/

I love William Shakespeare or as I call him White Tyler Perry.

My nose just scrunched up reading those last 6 words.

I hate when people say “men shouldn’t wear dresses” cause I think every man could benefit from airing out their balls all day.

DC JUST ADDED JULY 10 & 11!!!

My dont tell set drops on Wednesday. Its so good I just know I’m about to be called all the slurs.

DC JUST ADDED JULY 10 & 11!!!

Involuntarily celibate sounds like something e40 would use in a song

Everyone’s broke. Stay inside and work on your personality.

gwen does fantastic work as usual on some of the 401,000 trans people who’ve had to flee hostile territory in their own country in the past 18 months.

Hey! On Friday night, Alison and I are hosting a last-minute Sup, Bro? show at Union Hall in Brooklyn, and it will be fun and you should come!

Sacramento went crazy last night!! That new E40 impression is a keeper. Thank you to everyone who turnt up on a Wednesday! San Francisco TONIGHT. See the rest of you soon! ✨

"Federal agents are conducting a raid at the office of L. Louise Lucas, a Democrat who serves as Virginia Senate President Pro Tempore." Lucas, one of Virginia's most powerful lawmakers, was at the forefront of the state's redistricting fight

So apparently my special is playing on HBO in Canada. Noice.

Bloop.

live right now. the morning show with Open Mike Eagle: NYT's 30 greatest songwriters | Jay Z interview | JPEGMAFIA interview | discord mountain twitch.tv/open_mike_ea...

AOC when asked about presidents

Learn to appreciate miracles before you lose them. I haven’t heard anyone complain about clapping when a plane lands ever since planes started falling out of the sky. That means people were so unappreciative of the miracle of flying that they needed people to die to stop complaining about it.

BATON ROUGE, La. (AP) — Louisiana postpones May 16 House primaries after US Supreme Court rolls back Voting Rights Act.

Art by @sinagrace.bsky.social !! See ya soon, lmk where else to hit 🤔

coffee is goated when grimly staring out the window imagining the future built for us by indifferent fate is the vibe

Moist without a choice

Renaissance of Raven is making its way to print!! Read about that, and how the journey was full of magical moments of “you never know…” sinagrace.substack.com/p/renaissanc...

A monthly women’s health magazine called “The Rag.”

The most research ever conducted on womens reproductive health is when men ask “damn are you on your period”

SCOOP: Two weeks ago, the head of the CDC delayed publication of a report showing covid vaccine cut likelihood of ER visits and hospitalizations by half. Now that report is no longer allowed to be published in CDC’s flagship scientific journal. My latest. 1/2 www.washingtonpost.com/health/2026/...

Be sure to read the whole thing.

This what it looks like when he turns one of his homies into a pedophile

I have to block you if you're saying that people who protested genocide were being paid to do so. Enough. Recover your soul.

Phoenix - this Saturday for Buds A Palooza. Im excited! Use code GIGGLE for $25 tics!!

DUBAI, United Arab Emirates (AP) — Iran's Supreme National Security Council says it has accepted a two-week ceasefire in the war.

Today I learned I can read German

voters elected decadent money man to make them rich, what they've gotten is warmongering fanatic who wants to cut their health care to pay for more bombs

This is why you don't have healthcare.

Lol not me having to announce a tornado watch and potential evacuation at my show tonight chicago you crazy

CHICAGO YOU MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE FOR TONIGHT SORRY TO EVERYONE WHO WAITED CAUSE YOURE GONNA HAFTA WAIT TIL JUNE FOR THE NEXT ONE SO MAY AS WELL GRAB THOSE TICKETS ASAP SEE YALL SOON

If you were wondering how the class field trip went

Chicago folk, go see this insane woman.

Chicago! One week. This is gonna be a silly good time. Stink in bio.

Bank of America agrees to pay $72.5 million to settle Epstein accusers' lawsuit reut.rs/4bCtm2D

I travel for a living and all I gotta say is good for them.

Stats on the number of TSA agents who called in sick at major airports on Weds, per DHS: ATL 40.6% IAH 39.2% MSY 36.1% HOU 31.7% BWI 29.1% JFK 28.9% LGA 24.7% PHL 23.5% PHX 22.8% PIT 21.6%

Chicago! One week. This is gonna be a silly good time. Stink in bio.

I genuinely genuinely don't know what the point of this kind of thing is. Trump is, quite obviously, not making or acting upon some sophisticated geopolitical view. Obviously. Nobody could possibly believe it, it seems humiliating to even pretend to believe it. What does pretending as much gain?

Honestly, fuck off.

Epidemiologists Confirm First Airborne Transmission Of Mar-A-Lago Face