I don't understand how Satire *didn't* go the way of the Dodo five years ago. I don't understand how it's still around today.

If the parachuting Christian baby is grabbing onto you when the rapture happens, do angels swoop up to grab him from the sky or do you both land in an empty planet?

What is it with clothing brands nowadays and a general aversion to colors? I get that trends come and go but I'm tired of walking past a store and only seeing blue, black and a thousand shades of beige.

Never pay more than $150 for a Casio.

My name is Marco and I undersign this message.

If you're going to start an argument about Nintendo being evil, which I kind of agree with by saying that their games are no longer cheap. Mate, do you know how much SNES games used to cost? How much N64 games used to cost? There's tons of better arguments than that one.

You know you fucked up terribly when people are coming to the defense of Jimmy Kimmel.

Every day I wake up to see America fucking itself deeper into an regime it can't unfuck itself from. I see decades of progressive policies ideas being destroyed in days. Health, education, entertainment, cities under vicious and ruthless attack while your alternative party worries about budgets.

I am amazed at just how inept the Democrats’ congressional leadership is on this moment of crisis. Trump is moving troops into blue cities and declaring war against the left, and these guys are complaining that the GOP Congress is pushing a partisan budget. Jesus Christ, wake the hell up.

Ah yes, a worst case scenario versus a best case scenario, as all fair comparisons are done /s

Of all the weird tech ideas that never took off I'm upset by how insistent certain companies are in trying to make smart glasses work. No one wants glassholes, we have more than enough of the regular type of assholes, in fact, we need to cull their numbers.

The more hardcore, or niche, the music genre is, the most gatekeepy the fans are.

I've said it once and I'll say it again. Andor is not a good Star Wars show. Andor is a good show that happens to be set in the Star Wars universea and it deserves to stand alongside other incredible tv shows, like Breaking Bad, as one of them, not as something from Star Wars that's good.

Tramell Tillman's was very, very deserving of the Grammy. I believe that Milchick, the character he portrays in Severance, will be remembered as one of the best villains of all time. Other performances will be compared to his in the future.

I've been watching this for 10 minutes and counting.

I often see videos of Youtubers telling people whether or not it's worth upgrading to this year's creme of the creme top of the line smartphone. Here's my handy alternative guide: Is your phone working? Yes - Don't upgrade, keep using it No - Completely broken? Buy a new one Kinda - Fix it.

So, who's next?

My threats of violence aren't cool enough for Bluesky to moderate them.

Hey uh, Europe, we don't need strong condemnation of Russia's actions. What we need is... [checks notes] oh, right... ACTION!

Someone shot up my kid's school today, and our governor is paying tribute to a guy who thought that is an acceptable price to pay for having the Second Amendment. Jared Polis has failed Colorado.

He lived for the second amendment. He fought for the second amendment. He died because of the second amendment.

Can we please not have two, back-to-back, world wars start with the invasion of Poland?

If no one else says it, I will. These are the ugliest iPhones that have ever been made, which is fine. Apple is allowed to have an ugly product generation, they once released a Square Nano, but with the iPhone we get cheap Chinese clones and cheap Chinese clones of something fugly is... [sigh]

I used to prefer Firefox to avoid "features" like this.

I'm tired of "journalism" that only parrots what politicians say. "We" cancel political influencers who debate assholes with shitty ideas, who shoot them down and prove them wrong, but we retweet every idiotic thing some compromised news platform parrots about a corrupt asshole in the government.

post a perfect album from the 90s that isn't Nirvana, Pearl Jam Soundgarden, or Alice In Chains

Hey uh, America... if you're having trouble telling apart domestic terrorists from your, supposedly, law-enforcing agents... well, I don't know how to break it to you but...

We need to tax podcasts somehow. Find some way to cull their numbers. Thanos snap them. I don't need a podcast about everything. No one has time for that.

Who the fuck bombs horses with drones? Are the horses terrorists too, you savage monster?

So... I'm guessing he's not gunning for the Nobel Peace Prize anymore?

This apple fell and rolled so far away from the tree that it became a gaslighting grape.

Democrats lost two of the most important elections of the century running candidates that defended the status quo and turned their back on the people and their basic rights and liberties. I think they're gunning for a third loss.

A man on the streets of the UK is asked about the “problem of immigration” and dismantles talking points with ease.

It's taken far far far FAR too fucking long, but I'm glad to finally see a meaningful and vocal shift away from Adobe products from hobbyists and professionals. Adobe should have gone the way of the Dodo over a decade ago.

Next time you hear a Republican say "think of the children", what they actually means is "think of how much more we can take from children". Even when American children pay the ultimate price, it's not enough for Republicans.

There's something shady going on with the reporting or excuses for the mass failure of SSDs that started after a Windows Update. It's anecdotal and all, but I know of at least two people who it happened to and I saw someone at a computer store buying a new SSD because his failed as well.

I'm all for supporting local businesses but when they're selling a product upwards of 200 euros more than most retailers, it's hard to do that.

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When I was very young I remember the occasional fire breaking out, but I don't remember hearing about "fire season". But go ahead and tell me climate change isn't real.

Almost broke the #1 internet rule. Remember everyone: Don't feed the trolls. Block and mute early and often. Don't engage. Block.

I hope sales numbers really hammer it in that consumers don't want thin devices at the expense of battery life.

Voting is about electing representatives. Voting is not about blackmail. Stop guilt-tripping people into voting for lesser evils. Lesser evils are what got us here, they're not what's going to get us out.

Pack it up everyone, no one's breaking this hide-and-seek record any time soon.

I feel like the only purpose Centre-Left political parties serve is to make endgame Capitalism and Autocracy more palatable.

Were you or your family politically persecuted? Did you have to abandon almost every material possession you have, your home, your pets, your family, your possessions? Have you ever starved? No? Then don't call yourself a Twitter refugee, you only made a new social media account.

Can we all agree that Centre-Left parties are pointless and useless?

The biggest threat to AI is common sense.

Can we please stop trying to elect people that would a perfect stand-in for a James Bond villain?