He died ages ago. this is pure cope

Matt "Good win"? More like Matt Cunt

When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep, like my granddad. Not screaming in terror, like all those people he killed. Cause he was a murderer, see?

“Aaand…that’s the end of my Ted Talk.”

Happy 40th Anniversary to The Dark Knight Returns

I've been trying to stay out of the BAFTA discourse -because I've really got no stake in it from any side- but did anyone expect him to say anything differently? Anyone who knows anything about him could have seen this coming a mile off. I mean, what was Jim Davidson doing at the BAFTAs anyway?

Gregor O'Samsa

Joanna Karpowicz (joannakarpowicz.pl), Anubis Does Twin Peaks II

Kids have to learn about the Helvetica Scenario somehow.

I saw one of the most important shirts I’ve ever seen last night

I have to use a parabolic mic because my wife only lets me listen to 3 or 4 birds at a time

I had the privilege of visiting the MERL today and getting a closer look at the board

I'm finding it difficult to believe this isn't something made up for @beefanddairy.bsky.social

Between takes on set Peter Cushing painted wargaming figures. He'd invite female costars to join him if they were new, looked lonely or being perved on by others on set. "Scream Queen" Ingrid Pitt proudly showed me the little figures they painted together once. Kept them all her life #nerdlings

Moebius

RIP Hollywood. The last Transformers movie cost $200 million💸 I was able to generate this clip for $10 and it only took me two days🪄 Improving 'creative skills' is a dead end. If you're not spending your time generating & watching content like this you'll be left behind.

Someone with a connection to Angela Morley read my book and got in touch with this anecdote from when his dad and Angela played in the Goon Show band:

Happy birthday, 2000AD. 49 years in an iso-cube and still the galaxy's greatest comic.

Accidentally donated a DVD containing video of my colonoscopy to a charity shop. If any comes across it in a British Heart Foundation, can they please let me know? It has sentimental value.

"GIRL! I wanna take you to a gay bar!"

The wilhelm scream isn't funny. Those characters are dying

Took It Up The Arse, She Wrote

Did you unsubscribe by accident? Yeah you'd like that wouldn't you.

doctor doctor gimme the news ive got an unworn pair of baby shoes

Ant Bank Robbery

Post a banger not in English. youtu.be/vwyuB8QKzBI?...

Tough day on Facebook. I still don't know what you're supposed to post under a picture of a cousin's newborn baby, but I've learned that it isn't 'Yikes'.

This is one of my favourites, and as Charlie Brooker puts it, has one of the greatest lurches in tone in film. Well worth seeking out.

Shame

Happy Birthday to Emo Philips. Some say he’s a “stand up guy” … I say he’s a Sicko. @emophilips.bsky.social

Jesus Christ would you look at the size of him. I wonder how big this Mario's pipe is?

Salman Rushdie

i made a version of wikipedia you can doomscroll xikipedia.org

Amazing how far things have come; Mock the Week's back, and now it has not one, but TWO female comedians, AND a brown person!

*indistinct and muffled yelling about genitals*

Chiles.

"And to the charge of having an unfathomably extensive knowledge of sissy porn, how do you plead?" "Guilty, your honour."

Whole lot of you following Neil Gaiman, and I assume it's because you forgot you did so and he stopped posting when it was revealed he is a rapist. Since he's trying to make a return, do yourself a favour and check if you're following @neilhimself.neilgaiman.com and if so unfollow and block.

I have spoken aloud exactly once. My words became known as "Dullard's Remark"

subscriptions >>> shop.viz.co.uk/viz353bs

get it right

Waiting for Godot? Wasting my time, more like. Cunt doesn't even turn up in the end!

subscriptions >>> shop.viz.co.uk/viz351bs

Lawyer here. There’s a lot of misinformation about what this means. It means he’s innocent even though he did it and the judge said that it’s good what he did

This is new

How many legs does the elephant have? At first glance, the answer maybe be obvious - but look a little closer, and this fiendish illusion reveals itself. (HD reupload)

Broke: levitating the Pentagon. Woke: turning the Pentagon into a circle using the powers of Muscle Mystery to nullify its magical influence.

- There's reports of several local heifers being found dressed as medieval fools. - Jester cow incidents? - No, police think they're linked.