Hasn’t been the same since these

3rd best moon pic ever

If that man can call from the moon you can text me back!

Describe your Bluesky account with a single image

🤨

Blame it on my roots

There was a scary noise so now I can’t sleep

Yeah that’s happened a few times in Surrey but everyone makes mistakes

I don’t think I should have to pay more taxes tbh.

Do we need pudding cups?

“Let’s go for a walk in nature but park as close to the playground as we can so people with kids can’t get parking spots”

I liked it better when nobody lived here

The entire city is in this parking lot

Nobody knows right of way here. They just stop and stare at you.

Wanna drive around throwing eggs at people

Everyone on the bad place is getting their account hacked

Enjoying the Easter chocolates a super hot guy bought me cause I’m awesome

How many junk drawers is too many

*werner herzog voice* one day the eggs will hunt you

Did any of you get Jenna her Easter basket or am I mass blocking people today?

unsure whether to be delighted or depressed by the chokehold that cactus club has on gen z

Big deal all men rise in the morning

“I have a craving for hard boiled eggs with pastel coloured shells” - Jesus

K I’ve waited 30 minutes and coffee has not appeared in my hand

Did Jesus see his shadow?

Keep going. Save yourself.

I’m gonna be so sad if you-know-who doesn’t post you-know-what for my birthday

😎

I’m way funnier than PMG

Stop

For Easter we’re putting a full carrot in our drink

My grandma used to make pierogis using KD cheese packets. This would have blown her mind.

I wanna make pierogies

I hope there’s an orange alert when it happens. Even if it wakes me up in the middle of the night. I want to know.

What I really want for my birthday is to eat cake off a bicep

Quit playing games with my heart

Seriously whose fake account is this

Any time Lindsey Buckingham is mentioned they bring up his relationship to Stevie Nicks. You'll never get away from the sound of the woman that loved you. www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/ar...

The same boomers who said we waste money on avocado toast will be spending $80 a day on gas to go to classic car meet ups this summer

Now that’s a good Easter basket

I didn’t even know they were going to the moon today. No one told me.

I tweeted about Diva cups once and someone replied that it was like shoving a high ball glass up yourself. I’ve never been the same since.

Shaker? Are we making a gross cocktail?

Whenever I say “I had a coworker” and then describe a total asshole, I’m talking about the same person

I had a coworker who sprayed cinnamon essential oil everywhere. It caused throat irritation and headaches in multiple people. They refused to stop because they were “cleansing the air of viruses” and then got pissed when the “scent free workplace” signs went up. dailyhive.com/vancouver/va...

The Lamar Odom doc makes the Kardashians look like saints and the family he abandoned look irrelevant

How do you professionally say “these people are self-important assholes who will fuck up and blame us for their incompetence”

I’m not convinced Buckleys isn’t minty come

It’s crazy that there’s no quick solution to back pain considering how often it effects men

Wanna see what came out of my nose @pmg2point0.bsky.social ?