Are you going to the store?

🎶 I don’t want a lot for Christmas There is just one thing I need A horse that does my murders for me Saddle up the Vengeance Steed 🎶

There is a box of ice cream in the freezer with three tablespoons of ice cream in it. I’m furious with whoever put it back in there (me).

search first name and glamour shot

Yeah, the Grink WAS there, actually. Good guy. Actually.

Which is the best version of A Christmas Carol

So if you get a clogged milk duct your partner can suck it out?! Is it firm like you’d know it’s out or does the milk just start moving again. How does this work

I thought I was ridiculous

This is what chickens look like when they run

TMZ reposted a video someone made threatening suicide and that’s fucked. When they get better they now have to deal with the world knowing something so private. Dicks.

Get 100% fucked

Intervene how 😐

Hit snooze again

I can’t

That’s a flex until he dies

They’re so pretty 🥰

Probably the best Canadian Christmas album...

Picked up lunch at a bar and seeing people day drinking alone is sad af

Near head on crash in Massey Tunnel.

I can try

All I want for Christmas is

Reminds me of highballs and ribbon candy

I can't believe how much tickets to the boy aquarium cost

Happy Festivus. I've got a lot of problems with you people!

Going to try making stuffing in a dutch oven this year. Don't even try to stop me.

I’m up!

I could have made it

Phase one of making Eldritch Horror themed gingerbread monstrosities.

I want to be Mia Wallace but I am Fabienne

👩🏻 *Finishing making myself a cup of coffee. Walks back to the table* 💅🏻Oh can you make me a coffee 👩🏻 *Sits down and enjoys my coffee* 😤 That’s fine I guess I can make my own coffee 👩🏻 Yup 🤯💥

My dream is to one day sit in a living room full of women napping while men clear the table

A fun little experiment to do over the holidays is respond like a man would and watch people glitch out

Still time to NOT be Scott this year and fill your wife’s sticking

Freezing my titties off

It only took me three weeks to call the doctor about my eczema and I chose three days before Christmas 😂

What is the white stuff that comes out of Mia Wallace's mouth as she's overdosing? Milkshake?

There’s caffeine in cocoa? Fuck.

Watching Mad Men and making men mad

I keep making hot chocolate so I have a reason to eat whipped cream

Wanna have a sad thread?

PP when you’re carrying an umbrella

🙌

Oh no

I heard this and it made me rethink how much attention I’m paying to others

People don’t notice when you’re struggling. They notice what you’re not doing for them.

And the widow laughs

Same entrance pyrotechnics and outfit Nana wore to PopPop’s funeral

It’s crazy how accurate these can be