If Donald Trump had a brain … his $250 dollar bill would actually be a coin. A golden coin the size of a drink coaster. Because I can draw ALL KINDS OF SHIT on paper money. Much harder to do that on the surface of a coin. Plus, with pocket full of $250 coins people think you got a *DONG*

Checks and balances. Donald Trump is trying to enrich his MAGA friends instead of lowering costs for you.

Donald Trump owes you a tariff refund.

Dumbest hot take yet. www.usatoday.com/story/opinio...

Is Trump going to use that slush fund money to pay Epstein victims to go away? Seriously. We would never know.

And let’s not forget the writers, producers and crew who also made the Late Show what it was and who have lost their jobs because our president is a thin-skinned thug who deeply fears the ridicule he so richly deserves.

Well. I’ve watched my last CBS show. Now what?

Fun fact: North Carolina still hasn’t recovered from hurricane Helene, and Trump wants $2 billion to give people who smeared shit on the walls of the Capitol.

Unsurprisingly for the most corrupt presidential administration in history, the White House document sent to GOP senators to convince them of the fund’s justifiability also greatly contradicts the legal agreement that actually established it. trib.al/IdPMCts

AOC: This is what drinking water in Georgia looks like after Meta began data center construction in the community.

The people of Barrington Illinois are selfish stuck up rich old money assholes. Maybe they can just join stupid ass KKK ass white nationalist Indiana? www.axios.com/local/chicag...

Avenged Sevenfold … though I did watch Rufus Wainwright get boo’d off the stage by Barenaked Ladies fans …

the republican obsession with trans people is creepy and fucked up

Not enough news coverage of how the insurrectionist reparations fund is a clear violation of the 14th Amendment. We need to enforce the Constitution in its original meaning and plain text. You can't imagine away parts of the Constitution just because it is politically inconvenient.

Wait... James Franco wants to make a comeback using the RAMBO franchise? Like... he does know that Sylvester Stallone is like big time hardcore MAGA now, right? So is James Franco just going run under the MAGA tent for cover? They *will* reputation scrub ANYONE.

Trump did not reach a settlement with the government. There was no case to settle. He has not created a slush fund. He has colluded with Todd Blanche to steal money from the US Treasury. This is not a “deal.” This is a crime for which Trump & Blanche must be prosecuted. It ia a crime.

I think my inherent disgust towards LLM AI is because it divorces the user from the weight of creation. What brilliance illuminated your life? What insights left you breathless? What strange paths did you wander? What work did you put in towards understanding what it means to be human?

Why does Donald Trump need a ballroom? He has no balls.

Mentally prepare yourself for the Walking Circus Peanut to give $10,000,000 of your tax dollars to this wockaflocka.

BREAKING: Trump administration announces $8 billion fund to compensate child molesters named in the Epstein files called “Raperations.”

Mike Johnson is a typical Christian Nationalist, full of ahistorical disinformation about the United States. "In God We Trust" was not a motto from this nation's founding. It was added in 1956, at the height of the Cold War, as a Christian Nationalist rebuke to the Soviet Union.

“I don't understand what it's supposed to do. Every time I see a video on Instagram that's like, 'Hollywood is cooked,' what follows is, like, the most stupid dog shit I've ever seen in my life…”

Alex Haley grew up in Tennessee. He traced his family tree back to his original enslaved, African ancestor, then wrote 'Roots'. He received a Pulitzer Prize for it. Knoxville just banned it 'cause it might make white kids sad.

The congressional switchboard number is (202) 224-3121. Put it in your cell phone. Use it. If you're not calling at least once a week, you're not doing your part.

Cartoon by Nick Anderson. (Follow him on Substack: https://nickanderson.substack.com/)

Hegseth is asking for a record $1.5 trillion defense budget. Roughly half of defense spending goes to private contractors that routinely price-gouge the government. Meanwhile, the Pentagon has failed EIGHT straight audits. The military industrial complex is cheering right now.

Donald Trump went to China and forgot that free speech is still protected under the Constitution here.

CARTOON OF THE DAY 😕🇺🇸 (From @andertoon.bsky.social )

They’re even laying off the alligators. thehill.com/homenews/sta...

Are you kidding me? Thom *STILL* can’t sing High and Dry live. Radiohead is not a good band. Radiohead never was a good band. Radiohead has just marketed as a good band. Fight me. www.vice.com/en/article/9...

wow -- Trump appears to call Rachel Scott a "bitch" as he finishes taking questions from reporters

Yesterday, Trump pointed at Rachel Scott of ABC News and said "she's a bitch" after Ms. Scott asked him about rising gas prices. It will be old news by close of business today. Once again: Trump is held to a different standard by legacy media.

Two years ago, ABC kicked off corporate media’s capitulation to Trump by settling a defamation lawsuit with him. Now, they’re fighting back against Trump’s FCC, accusing the agency of violating their free speech rights. Kudos to ABC for taking a stand. More media companies should follow suit.

Residents in Fayette County, Georgia noticed their water pressure was unusually low. Turns out that a data center 20 miles away had been drawing 30 million gallons of water in secret through connections the county didn't know existed. Is it any wonder why so many are opposed to data centers?

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame does not represent me as a fan of music.

So Two things. 1. The National Comedy Museum still has a *TON* of College Humor content, but zero @dropout.tv mentions 2. I didn’t see a single mention of Kyle Kinane, which is disappointing

Cool cool cool Jon and Seth … now do Louis C.K. variety.com/2026/tv/news...

They didn’t say why they support sexual assaulters or transphobes other than “they are getting a lot of attention”. Comedy isn’t just saying horrible things and mugging until you get someone to laugh. Netflix’s Robbie Praw and Tracey Pakosta should be fired. apple.news/A5HZKdP-CRZe...

We've reached the point where one party has so obliterated the rule of law that everyone else continuing to abide by it will only hasten the end of our democracy. That's a recipe for chaos and violence. It's terrifying, and I don't know what we do about it.

An overturned election is a great time for the people and companies of Virginia to join a pact to not pay property or income taxes until their representation has been restored.

The *same* Wayne Brady that played the Riyadh Comedy Festival? www.vulture.com/article/wayn...

At this point, I think he is just trolling us.

Wait. I thought that was a parody post. Sure Justice Robert’s. Whatever you say, man.

My new special is OUT NOW! Watch TEA & SCOTCH on Gorilla Comedy+!

The Spirit Airlines demise is a direct result of the Iran war's impact on jet fuel. Wall St Dems who know that yet still blame a 2-year-old merger challenge, which if it didn't happen would've just led to a bigger airline going bankrupt, are being extremely disingenuous. prospect.org/2026/05/05/a...

Uh huh. Yeah. Sure Elon Musk and SpaceX are gonna put a million people somewhere. Maybe Mars? Maybe Hell? Make a bet on Polymarket and roll the dice you Muskchudsimps!

Just makin' it clear for your asses. Erasing the voices of black and brown people is not "agree to disagree" territory.

Oh look … just McDonald’s deciding to gate-keep access to the soda fountain to find new ways to charge you more for sugar water that costs $0.02 but they want to charge you $4.00 for ONE CUP.

Well… that’s gonna be over a million dead humans on Mars, because not even Elon can escape background radiation with SpaceX “tech”. www.bgr.com/2162273/elon...