*futurama farnsworth voice*

a guy being all green is one of the funniest things that can happen. george lucas knew this when he made yoda.

beeS5 (ps5 but its in the bee movie universe)

help i followed every suggestion chatgpt health gave me for one week and now all of the skin on my body is shriveled and green

nice post did your mommy write it for you

literally my polycule

LOOK AT HERRRRRR 😍

we're at the weird christian cult restaurant and the hostess be STARING

cleansing my soul and my credibility with this banger

listening to american football for the 50th time to see if maybe ill finally like it this time

blehhhh

Barkeep! A round of angel shots for everyone!

I felt it was my duty to inform everyone that these old-ass men are finally living their truth

Walking into a GameStop right before they close walking to the Wii U section and moaning in violent ecstasy

Google Balls....

watching my wife and my girlfriend make out did incredible things to my brain chemistry

i love having wild crazy sex with three beautiful transsexuals

is this too mean

ew dude no id never engage in that kind of weird kink stuff no im normal over here i want to have sex with normal women and also maybe a handful of robots from select sci-fi media properties

Gohan and Piccolo at Vinnie’s Pizza #dragonball

incredibly normal themed library display

yarrrr maties it be a trans woman on me datin application

this is what hacking the mainframe actually means

human in the year negative 1 million: what if i had cow pull till and then i dont have to human in present day: im just a poor cow-girl desperate to be milked

DOLLYWOOD ENDED THEIR SEASON EARLY I WAS GONNA GO THIS WEEK!!! 😭😭😭 DOLLY WHYYYY

chat i am eating a 4 pack of vanilla pudding tf u mean this shits been less than 2 dollars this whole time. im buying this at least once a week now.

as a noted clown enjoyer i approve this clown

the dumbest person alive: “the trans community has to be inclusive of sissies” the average sissy: “hello trans woman. i’m a sissy so we’re practically the same. i like jorking my penis to sissyhypno and cumming in my wife’s panties. do you want to fuck my wife. do you want to fuck my wife. do you w

selfie from the other night :3

my girl....

SHE'S SO CUUUUUUTE I LOVE MY GIRLLLLLLLL 🥰🥰🥰🥰

Good grief! Whose dick do i gotta suck to get a mouth full of cum around here huh??

quick one to start off the new year. don't test her resolve...

there needs to be better representation for cheaters

I think my new years goals this year should be to be a lil sluttier and try cooking more new things

[sees his plane ticket to Turkey and grazes the edges of his receding hairline] promise you won't do it.... for me..

In which a Texas judge says Texas "does not cite evidence to substantiate the assertion that downloading an app of any kind without parental permission poses a health hazard to minors"

we met buc-ee. he's real

the whole polycule did a four way group kiss at midnight and then every combination of the four of us kissed individually. happy 2026 everyone. this is the best start to a new year i've ever had 💜💞

i want the entire rest of my life to be like this :3 i love fern mercury and sky with all my heart

hey sorry i just biked to failure, is it ok if i puke into your carpet bestie? no no i mean the floor

getting emotional about the megaman rock opera again in the back of this car

i should name my daughter "exogenous hormones"

a silver lining to a robot uprising would be getting really autistic about different models the way people do with trains and planes