Pan-seared turbot on a bed of thinly-sliced Dauphinoise drizzled in lemon sauce, a side plate of truffles, quail eggs and caviar, with a file in it.

"Ooh, I'd like to take down *your* particulars!"

Lenny Henry to be sent to The Wall and forced to join the Night's Watch

When he does 'there's only one way to get rid of a mole'

Father Pancake visited in the night, to crush my bones and organs so flat that I can be slid 'neath a locked pantry door. Shrove blessings to all.

Just found out that I'm Alan Partridge, The Thick Of It, and The Death of Stalin were written by A.I. Shan't be watching those again! 😠

Valentine's Day is none of my business

Well, this has cheered me up no end. 👍🏻👌🏻

Deadly earworm jingles, proper British dinners in tins, and milking Arthur Mullard. Now available for all, a new video takes an extensive look at the omnipresent and ludicrously oversexed TV ads of the 1970s. www.youtube.com/watch?v=u1So...

Pound

Replying "fine, thanks!" when someone asks how you are, whilst desperately yearning to feel the weight of shovelled dirt upon your face.

2026 Channel Advert Time: I talk about old TV stuff and I get annoyed and then I do a drum and bass remix about it. It's a whole thing. www.youtube.com/rosetintedspectrum

Ricky Gervais:

Monthly Patreon thread. As always, first month's free as I won't charge until March. Tiers start at £1, with 915,000+ written words plus hours of audio/video There's three videos this month, one of which will be Patreon exclusive Here's a public index of all the posts: patreon.com/posts/26784352

Christmas is over when I say it's over! Clambering over its Patreon paywall and now available for all, it's your fifth annual Selection Box video. www.youtube.com/watch?v=VX-M...

A pal has been re-editing the Saw franchise, but dubbed entirely with dialogue, music and sound effects from the Carry On films www.youtube.com/watch?v=SFT_...

The last year or so has been a creeping realisation that I am quite, quite autistic and everyone was aware of this but me.

Until the television was invented 100 years ago, people's impressions of Benny from Crossroads went completely unseen.

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell some bristols and maybe a bum!"

Unknowingly filmed by a TikToker wearing Smart Glasses as he repeatedly interrupted his own anecdote with jokes about being so small he "baths in an eggcup" and "recently flew to Spain... on the back of a bluebottle"

People in the 80s loved to see Crocodile Dundee kneeling down to lift up the toilet lid and post his turds through. "Is this how you use one of these things, mate? A normal bloke like me usually leaves me stinko's where they fall."

I'm Gef the Rappin' Mongoose And I'm here to say I'm living in your walls In a sinister way

Another day spent pissed off I'm not a character in an E. F. Benson ghost story titting around an enormous country house a hundred years ago while some lurking unnamed horror prepares to give me a bally big fright in my bedchambers.

Not to be an arse, but the written pieces will probably stay on Patreon now. The blog gets thousands of hits every month from AI bots scraping for 'learning', and I *really hate* the idea of them feeding my work into their plagiarism machines.

Here he is with Rachel Reeves.

Starmer loved adverts for cereal or McDonalds where a British kid did an American accent. "They're such cool dudes!" he said, skateboarding round the podium in a big basketball top.

26 and a bit years ago, the best breakfast show on TV did an overnight Millennium Eve edition, its a good job it was on Channel 4 because of some of the content and @franticplanet.bsky.social has brought it back for us, and can I just say, Richard Bacon, what a twat! www.youtube.com/watch?v=1l6g...

Y2K? Wahey! Now available for all, my new video endures The Big Breakfast's nine-hour millennium night marathon. www.youtube.com/watch?v=1l6g...

The original Peggy Mitchell when she heard they'd recast.

Dying and going to Hell and swearing you recognise someone but can't place from where, and he sighs and tells you he was the bloke in Garden of Earthly Delights with a bunch of flowers up his arse.

Dennis Waterman at the 1983 Logie Awards is very VERY clearly drunk, and he's got a feme tune to sing

'SCHOOLS AND COLLEGES' CLOCK Huge thanks for all of yesterday's orders for our new 'Schools and Colleges' clock. Last few available in the shop for shipping in February. hiddenbritain.bigcartel.com/product/scho...

Having to hide when you heard the rattle of the skeleton bus coming down your street. Taping the letterbox down so they couldn't stick their arms in to feel around. Trying to keep the dog quiet when your house was surrounded.

This is great - well worth signing up to Stuart's Patreon for

Fred Dinenage as a homeless man in Winchester was a FAR better job. Meridian even gave him a dog.

[sweeping drone footage of a Scottish castle] Claudia: "Last night, one of the faithful was murdered, but who?" Mournful, breathy female singer: "🎵 Some Trevor Francis tracksuits... from a mush in Shepherd's Bush... Bush, Bush, Bush..."

"A BALLBAG?!"

Pre-TV Superted, you say?

Monthly Patreon thread. As always, first month's free as I won't charge until Feb. Tiers start at £1, with 908,000+ words of content plus hours of audio and video (some of it Patreon-exclusive). Here's a public index of all the posts: patreon.com/posts/26784352

Has he been?

2025's final video is now available for all. God Help Ye, Merry Gentlemen, it's Little and Large at Christmas. www.youtube.com/watch?v=gujz...

Thoroughly lost my mind at this panicked Generation Game contestant (he was 31, if you're wondering)

Here, have a spooky little song I made last year

I'm bored so here once again is the greatest Christmas title sequence in TV history