Sorry pal, I'm alllll outta fucks to give. You're looking for Keith, down the hall second door on the right, smells like burning wood and ozone you can't miss it

I hope Curtis Sliwa sticks around because I though of the Halloween costume, Curtis Ewok two weeks too late

Me, when I accidentally drop and shatter 8 of my little, wooden, laser-cut fucks

Seriously considering making my own tortillas instead of walking to the grocery store to get some The grocery store is next door

Me, when I accidentally drop and shatter 8 of my little, wooden, laser-cut fucks

The team? Trash. The weather? Shit. The rent? Abysmal. The people? Assholes. The pay? Garbage. The politics? Vile. 3 years ago I came up with this, and a friend asked, “who’s this for?” Well, no one’s asking that now Available in a bunch of fun variants at keithdecent.com/shop #art 🧶 #bsnm

Yeah he and Bernie and some others have been pretty disappointing on that front, but if I lose my health insurance and groceries double in price again I may have to consider actually pedaling hog

Sheehan: 78 years old Durbin: 80 years old Kane: 67 years old Hassan: 67 years old King: 81 years old Rosen: 68 years old Masto: 61 years old Fetterman: 56 years old

Sheehan: 78 years old Durbin: 80 years old Kane: 67 years old Hassan: 67 years old King: 81 years old Rosen: 68 years old Masto: 61 years old Fetterman: 56 years old

Remember when the Democratic Party party turned on David Hogg for suggesting we should primary the types of senators who would do shit like fold in half at the worst possible time, resulting in millions of Americans getting fucked over a barrel?

Joyce Carol Oates should say he can't do backflips off the roof next

second verse on this is one of the funniest things i've ever heard

Quick sketch

No dumb women and no gooners? Is this going to be an entire artistic movement comprised of… I’m going to be honest. The joke was to name a genre of art comprised entirely of precious, sexless bores, but gooners and dumb women dominate literally every medium and movement

Lol ok nate. Wanna bet?

So it’s sorta of a… poster’s strike?

So it’s sorta of a… poster’s strike?

fun fact: despite popular belief, CatDog is neither descended from cats nor dogs, and in fact shares most of its DNA with Taenia saginata, commonly known as the beef tapeworm

Lol ok nate. Wanna bet?

The team? Trash. The weather? Shit. The rent? Abysmal. The people? Assholes. The pay? Garbage. The politics? Vile. 3 years ago I came up with this, and a friend asked, “who’s this for?” Well, no one’s asking that now Available in a bunch of fun variants at keithdecent.com/shop #art 🧶 #bsnm

Primary ALL of them.

So every freelancer you know is going to lose their insurance or be bankrupted by premiums because Schumer is an invertebrate

He’s so utterly befuddled because the act of simply understanding another person must seem like some impossible magic power to Elon

Broke: going back in time to kill baby hitler Woke: sending Chris Saatchi back in time to buy all of Hitler’s shitty art

Staying informed in 2025:

I think it’s bad that a Republican is the senate minority leader

I dunno, If I had a trillion dollars I would simply buy happiness

I love when someone who follows 80k people also follows me because it makes me feel like one of those candy bars near the checkout at grocery stores

Broke: going back in time to kill baby hitler Woke: sending Chris Saatchi back in time to buy all of Hitler’s shitty art

He’s so utterly befuddled because the act of simply understanding another person must seem like some impossible magic power to Elon

I dunno, If I had a trillion dollars I would simply buy happiness

I love when someone who follows 80k people also follows me because it makes me feel like one of those candy bars near the checkout at grocery stores

Quick sketch

robocop: CRIME... DOES NOT SLEEP. SO NEITHER... SHOULD I. human cop: hey unrelated but i can't get this out of my head. anyone ever tell you you have incredibly pouty blowjob lips? robocop: YES.

The bots are here to steal your life away 15 seconds at a time. You don’t get that back. The block button is an investment in your future

The bots are here to steal your life away 15 seconds at a time. You don’t get that back. The block button is an investment in your future

The republican DOJ brought this to the Republican Supreme Court at the behest of the Republican President, to cover for the Republican house and senate I just don’t get why the democrats would do this

“No thanks, I do my own research” The research:

The point of posting Instagram Stories about cooking is to make every ex who sees them go “I made a mistake”

I don’t think companies are collecting ENOUGH data There’s no reason Canon should be trying to sell me a $3000 camera based off of the $450 camera I bought 8 years ago I bought using a gift card, and haven’t connected to a device in over 4 years

The point of posting Instagram Stories about cooking is to make every ex who sees them go “I made a mistake”

"Smoking on the 'Bill Crackman' tonight" 😂 Jamaal Bowman, Hasan Piker, Tish James, Cynthia Nixon, Mahmoud Khalil, Brad Lander, Jennifer Welch, Zohran's mom Mira Nair, and so many other fun folks stopped by the Zeteo livestream last night in Brooklyn. Here are the bits, in less than 3 mins. Enjoy!

BREAKING: The Trump administration seeks an emergency pause to a court order demanding full November SNAP payments.

oh they got video www.thewrap.com/conde-nast-f...

May you never reach a “here’s what is inaccurate about your dumb meme” follower count -old Irish proverb