In 2025, I kept all my kids alive so basically nailed it.

I will be doing the same next year as I did this year: Being silly and enthusiastic Constantly yapping about my family Wearing red lipstick when I need courage Twirling tassels Shaking ass

May 2026 be better for us all in every way.

Gonna try making Pommes Anna for the first time today and having a whole way to make potatoes with my name on it is delightful!

2026 ins and outs Out: being polite and respectful to our enemies In: the destruction of our enemies, disrespectfully

Hi burlesque bluesky the way you do this is you loosen the glove and then tuck the loose fingers in the underwire of your bra and snap your hand out. Let me know if you need help!

Actually, yes.

This is one of my favorite ways to peel a glove

The time I did that on purpose did not suck.

No clever caption just a dancer between costumes

The load bearing Edmontosaurus lives rent free in my brain.

Oh apparently I do not repost my thirst traps enough, I think y’all have to help me

Oldest successfully deployed the “ask to see Carmen Miranda to delay bedtime” strategy again but in my defense I want attainable feminine icons for my daughter.

I don’t care if Marjorie Green is fighting with republicans, I want to see people who don’t normally pay attention to politics being intensely aware of how horrible on every level these people are.

This is my favorite post today, I had no idea people who aren’t intense political nerds saw those!

starting a list

I accept my interest in vintage hot girls made me an outlier on this one.

Praying my kids forget about the Touch Tunnel

I am happy the sewer rats are trying to eat the other larger, but increasingly ailing, sewer rats. But just because I might throw some bait into the sewer to agitate the rats into eating each other as time goes on does not mean I plan on welcoming the winning sewer rats into my home and bed later.

Making the Frodo Baggins eyes at yet another soft pink magnetic nail polish

I need to show you this nativity scene from the Church of San Geremia e Lucia in Venice.

I have been hauling Christmas inflatables out of our goldfish pond in my vintage Olga nightgown because I wear it all the time and can the state either quit being so windy or send me some strapping young neighbors?

My oldest just informed me that Madonna is 6-7

BEHOLD!

This soup smells so good I’m in my kitchen making the 🤌🏻 hands about it

life is a piñata and next year is my turn with the bat

Does anyone have a rib roast ramen recipe they love?

I wrote about lesbian pulp for The Baffler. thebaffler.com/latest/odd-g...

@blakethebutcher.bsky.social by ANY chance do you know Velvetina Taylor because she’s the only NYC performer I know who also dances in Nashville and I truly should visit you.

I deserve to have as much horny lit as the straight women in this essay I will yearn and take no definitive action

Heavy breathing

I am like two pages into Fingersmith and I’m already in love.

Look at me, learning from my mistakes, doing my post snow stretches

This is my favorite post today.

Gonna make some core memories with these kids if it kills me!

Otters in hats thread!!!!!

you guys know someone from The Cure died, too, right 🖤

To be honest beehives are fun and whimsical and due for a comeback but the kids are going to go full emo first going by the 2000’s trend.

My only thought on Bardot is we have tons of women who look great in a beehive who aren’t hideous inside.

One thing I will note about flexibility at 39 is if you skip a few days of stretching you will regret it. Source: me, I am full of regret after shoveling snow and going sledding with no stretching.

Tbh I personally do not own a zoot suit and this is a crime.

We have only grown more sexually dysfunctional as a society. Let Mortimer be a sexy bi raconteur. Let superheroes make love. Let us live.

My haters thread immediately turned into a things we love thread and I should make this an annual post.

i was going to wait and make sure i wasn’t hitting anna over the head with too much teenaged daniel but if you insist 😁

Okay I am forced to agree.

There's a Mexican place by me that charges for chips and salsa! I don't care how good it is; that's table stakes. Charge me $15 for a beer or $8 for a taco. I'll pay it. Charge me rent for the table. I don't care. But charging for chips and salsa? ABSOLUTELY NOT.

HARD YES!

Chris is right. But also men should bring back zoot suits because I deserve a little treat.

I would die happy if I never have to see another video from "girl with the dogs," she's so mid and does stuff the hard way while aggravating the dogs for clicks and people send me her videos and I'm like??? Have you SEEN what I do? What am I supposed to be taking away, here???

YES GET CLOVER DON’T BE A BALLSACK