'No cameras called. No drama. Just instinct. That’s leadership. Kind. Grounded. Energetic. Action-oriented' #nzpol

I was going to say can you imagine Jacinda doing that sort of thing and the backlash, but no, no I can't imagine that. Only Luxon is that utterly inept. #nzpol

Not like the upper north island is getting destroyed or anything, but at least Luxo took the time out of doing fuck all about it again, to announce a State of Origin match in Auckland. Not the final...a match. Just a clueless, out of touch cunt. #nzpol

How long till the cost of these flooding events, sewage spills and boil water notices costs more than 3 waters would’ve? I reckon tomorrow arvo? #nzpol

The more I read about this India FTA, the more I see it’s just an absolute shit deal for NZ. “If you wanting us buying your apples and pears, then you need to roll out the red carpet for immigration..forever. We’ll decide how many and the terms” Luxon couldn’t deal a fukn poker hand #nzpol

lol this is gonna burst so fucking hard

m8, we hear ya

Kinda want to start strong arming landlords into donating their tax refunds towards disaster relief aye. $6b would have gone a long way the past few weeks. #nzpol #fuckthisgovt

wow we’re just saying the quiet part out loud now huh

This kid goes from hands in his hoodie pocket to annihilating this prick in like less than half a second this is the coolest shit ever lmao

know the difference illegal: i am going to call in a bomb threat legal: do you want me to call in a bomb threat?

Elections should be replaced by medieval jousting I reckon. #nzpol

I’d actually pay money to see David Seymour eat the end of a scaffolding pole. #nzpol

If, as the NRA claim, most firearms are used for hunting and recreational purposes, you'd expect to see a lot more "gun rental" places. I mean why would you need to own one if it's only used a few times a year for hunting etc?

"..has been forecasted to save the taxpayer almost $300m already." So it hasn't actually saved the taxpayer that at all...but David is pretty sure it will. As long as you don't count the ACC claims for burns and illness etc. #nzpol

Cos apparently people lose the ability to read English if there are four Māori words in front of it. #nzpol #justsaytheNwordDavid

Up to half hour delays on Portobello Rd in Dunedin. Tree felling and the shittiest traffic management I’ve ever experienced.

Sidenote but related I’m getting real fukn sick of subsidising North Island roads while we can barely get a hospital. #nzpol

$50b is necessary for roads, but an extra $300m for ferries was just too fukn much. #nzpol #punchablefacebishop

The fucking irony of Winnie and Shane Jones saying Māori are over represented in Parliament. #nzpol

Alternate headline: “Winston vows to get the racist votes back off ACT” #nzpol

"The terrorist has claimed due to his isolation he suffered a complete nervous breakdown and loss of his identity." Um, given his identity is "piece of fucking shit whose gums I wouldn't piss on if his teeth were on fire".....good?

Looks like the kind of guy who pronounces "beer" as "beeeaahh"

"You'll have to read the plaque text out loud before giving it to him...he's illiterate"

What boils my piss most about this, is they went with the 15 years of payday loan level interest. 15 years minimum of levies, so we can pay 170% higher costs. #nzpol

Here's something real fukn easy to understand. Power companies have been raking in record profits year on year, and have been paying shareholder dividends instead of investing in new generation. #nzpol

Oh... LNG is just too complicated for NZers understand. Bishop literally just said that. It's too complicated for us to understand. #nzpol #punchableface

Who gives a fuck what Labour and the Reserve Bank did “during Covid” They still spent/borrowed less in 4 years than NACT in the past 2. Maybe have an inquiry on how you’re such an utter fuck-up Nicola. #nzpol

Tumblr died in these waters.

Alternate headline: “It became public just how much Sunny was ripping us off” #nzpol

Otis is fkn huge. Daschund for scale. #greyhound

Post a banger not in English

I mean it’s been over 6 months since panty-liner ear, and there’s no Netflix doco? Melania got a whole movie.

punk dilemmas

Ghislaine has said she can clear the orange guy of any crimes. The same Ghislaine who effectively plead her way out of perjury charges. (by being an annoying cunt to the point prosecutors just couldn't be arsed pursuing them) #epsteinfiles

There isn't a govt levy on dairy so farmers can buy more fukn cows #nzpol

Or better yet...the power companies that keep reporting record profits every year. Maybe the shareholders can suck it up and get slightly less dividends for once.

Uh…how about put the levy on fukn GAS being that it’s to pay for y’know…gas. Why the fuck should I pay more for my electricity so someone else can an have cheap gas? #nzpol #

I mean it’s been over 6 months since panty-liner ear, and there’s no Netflix doco? Melania got a whole movie.

Interesting how there were 2 assassination attempts on the orange guy, and a successful one on C Kirk, but after a few days we never heard a thing about the assassins ever again. Not saying there a conspiracy. It’s just an observation.

So it was no books that had an effect on mosque murder boy’s mental health. Not the fact he’d fukn slaughtered 51 people.

The takeaway from this, is even the orange guy had no interest in "the alternative, patriot, maga, christofacist, kid rock halftime show" and still watched the proper one.

When mainstream media are calling AI slop too, you've lost

I don’t get it. Does the mosque terrorist think he’s going to get a better deal in a trial? Remove the guilty plea from the equation and it wasn’t going to be a better outcome for him.

Winston Peters has been in politics for 312 years, changes position more than most people change their undies and yet his arguments are still presented as though he means them in good faith. A sane media would have mocked him out of politics years ago

Today I am announcing my campaign for the Dunedin City Council byelection. I’m standing to offer leadership that's ready to go on day one; that's willing & able to challenge the government’s reforms; & that's prepared to make decisions in the best long-term interests of the city. aaronhawkins.nz

My body is a finely tuned instrument and that instrument is a Muppaphone.

The staffer