it's 2025 and the gangly guy who appeared on a few seasons of The Office is now our only mirror to society

This man does not sit, he straight up *lounges* on the couch

Bacon-wrapped pork tenderloin with garlic rosemary mashed potatoes and roasted broccolini I love breaking out the fine dining skills when I get the chance to

Who has made this 🤣

Imagine all the childhood hunger, poverty, and homelessness that $77 billion could’ve solved Instead, it went to this failed vanity project for one of the biggest moron’s on the planet Because yeah Mark, it definitely wasn’t apparent from the very beginning how dumb an idea this was

Soon, CNN will run live odds on world events where its viewers can gamble on them in real time on their smartphones. One recent Kalshi betting market that allowed people to bet on whether Palestinians in Gaza would suffer mass starvation.

Somehow I knew once Bari Weiss had some time to dig into the CBS News operation she’d discover what they need on air is Bari Weiss.

This evening's thought to ponder from Maggies Farm. How it all began.

Scoop: FBI aims to escalate its inquiry into 6 Democrats who made video for troops by pressing domestic terrorism squad to launch a formal seditious conspiracy investigation. Washington Field Office leaders are pushing back b/c they don't see a crime. news.bloomberglaw.com/us-law-week/...

🐺 🎄

Merry Incest everyone

Posted over 150 times in just a few hours last night. The guy’s brain is absolutely cooked Great work to the millions of Americans who fucked us over and out this guy back in the WH

Every sentence here is even crazier than the last.

I remember as a freshman in my undergrad program, I ended up dropping a class on ancient history because the instructor was routinely citing the Bible, not as a contemporary account that we could glean some information from, but as essentially a factually accurate, historical text

This edible aint shit…. *takes another* 𝓞𝓷𝓮 𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓵𝓪𝓽𝓮𝓻

Italian Thanksgiving 🇮🇹 A thread 🧵: My partner comes from a massive Italian family, so every holiday becomes a whole ordeal, mainly centered on food (of course) There is perhaps no greater smell in the world than walking into this place. Amish Market that sells organic, from-scratch everything

Pure cinema

Only in America would we brag about willingly giving time up with friends and family, all to waste your time and effort making the world’s richest man even more money, on an utterly useless and worthless product Do you want to be on your deathbed wishing you had spent more 36 hr days at work?

The investigators asked Clint Massie how many more girls in the church might come forward with stories about him touching or kissing them. “I mean, there could be hundreds,” he said.

White House Reclassifies Nursing As Hobby

An issue we're seeing at all levels of university is that many students are simply refusing to do *anything*. They aren't reading the syllabus, aren't following assignment guidelines, aren't engaging with material, ignoring deadlines. And this might seem like old news, but it truly has ramped up.

Finally getting some theological clarity on the ethics of reclining in one’s plane seat

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

I’m firing my wife tonight before she can do this to me

This is why these people need to go There’s no building relationships or anything like that with people who are willing to literally murder their own kids to appease Dear Leader Trump

Nature is healing

Fuck all the negativity going on in the world If nobody else tells you today, I hope you have a Happy Thanksgiving Eat your favorite food, ignore your idiot relatives, and try to enjoy the holiday

Being among the first interrogated and ultimately fired by DOGE, I certainly felt we were facing the business end of a right-wing conspiracy theory 🧵

This is Bolt. He just learned how to speak. Thinks it works best when he uses his whole body. 12/10 (TT: gavi_570)

I resent seeing furries being dragged into this

nose down ass up that's the way we cyberstuck

Today’s 8+ hour nightmare trip to NJ was made infinitely better once I found out that weed is legal here Fantastic work NJ, this is going to make Thanksgiving so, so much better

This is Skye. She refuses to let her human leave for college. Willing to do anything to get him to change his mind about this whole "education" thing. 13/10 (IG: skye.redgoldenretriever)

MPA Rates ‘Zootopia 2’ PG-13 For Sexually Awakening Content https://theonion.com/mpa-rates-zootopia-2-pg-13-for-sexually-awakening-content/

This asks so many more questions than it answers Who are the 18% of people that think science fiction absolutely nailed it when guessing what aliens would look like? What else do you believe if you accept something like this?

Remember when Trump went up in front of thousands of Boy Scouts and started talking about sex parties on yachts? But yeah no, I’m sure the pedophile rapist president isn’t to blame for any of this culture making people feel unsafe. Or the alcoholic beverage rapist in charge of DoD

I thoroughly enjoy finding jobs where my fringe benefit is getting enough of my work done, quickly enough, on a daily basis, that I basically get paid to vape for multiple hours a day I’d never tell an employer that, but my vape addiction is a major factor into how I choose a job

I had to give my dogs Trazadone for their vet visit and the results were fantastic

Like when Frenchie in The Departed explains “there are certain guys you’re not allowed to hit” Don’t pick a fight with a combat vet, astronaut, pilot…

The Onion Reviews 'The Hunger Games Catching Fire'

these people basically just take luxury government jets and go to fancy events like make a wish kids while their minions flashbang your elderly neighbors

He’s a good man And thorough

Excellent to see the youth on the college campus I work at are having none of this wannabe authoritarian bullshit

Just gonna save this bit from NPR’s coverage of the Mamdani-Trump meeting That way, whenever I get a “the left overuses the word fascist!” whine from a conservative, I can just point out that Trump literally describes himself as a fascist

In celebration of what would have been Robert F. Kennedy’s 100th birthday, Maxwell Taylor Kennedy has penned an op-ed celebrating his father’s legacy—and savaging his brother, Robert F. Kennedy Jr., for tearing it down.