Driving around Connecticut all day and gas is between $3.99 and $4.47 depending on where you are…

A pigeon managed to crap right into the passenger door handle of our car 🤣

I can count on my fingers the number of tests I’ve failed in my life and the very first one was the vision screening in first grade.

But I was promised a communist hellscape

I’m forever grateful that mine never developed an interest in people food (except cheese, dude is a Parmesan fiend)

came faster than i expected

You can’t fire everybody that makes something great and still have that thing. It walked out the door with them.

The problem with “curbing your shopping by only buying clothes/shoes secondhand” is the enormous amount of time you spend searching for the exact thing you want in your size 🤣

I’m an insufferable transplant but: fuck yeah this place rules.

The article mentions that they rejected existing deidentified data sets… now how do I get in my chart that I was “not normal” per lay people before I got any vaccines?!

I definitely watched the Bronco chase, 1994 me had no idea who or what the Knicks were

Hey, wanna see Sam Elliott as he appeared in a 1976 issue of Teen Beat?

I’m sure New Yorkers will be polite and deferential… nah, can’t even finish that sentence. I can’t wait to hear the creative stuff people will be yelling

You can tell the Knicks are in the finals because all the little kids are in Knicks shirts and all the ad boards are for “bet on New York with Kalshi”

I’m a pharmacist and I know at least one psychiatrist who’d be willing to fight this guy

I dated a guy in college who enjoyed singing in the car as much as I did. He once had to turn off the radio and announce “no, we are NOT going to Peabo and Celine ‘Bat Out of Hell.’” RIP.

This is just the logical next book in the George Santos series

Didn’t have “explain the ‘it’s gonna be May’ meme to my boss” on my bingo card for today, but here we are

My brain will not switch on

Cat checkpoint. Relinquish the most recent cat picture on your phone.

There are so many monoclonal antibody names that just LOOK misspelled to me, even when I type them correctly…

It’s me, trying mightily and failing to look like anything but a frumpy elder millennial

I literally felt pollen showering on my face with the wind yesterday. Time to order some ketotifen eye drops 😣

if the spurs end up facing the knicks in the finals in a 1999 rematch, we all have to post like it’s 1999

I always assumed stories about “a bar called the Library” were apocryphal, but today I saw one with my own eyes.

Remember you’re never alone.

Kathy playing tough defense even with only three fingers on her tiny hand

The worst thing about middle age is not being able to be out all day with no bathroom access and *not feel it.*

We submitted the condo board package!!! Everybody think good thoughts that the building will accept “aging nerd couple with senior cat”

Full time salaries are being paid to people creating this crap

Re-upping my offer to write your emails - premium quality bullshitting guaranteed! - for much cheaper than $500m. I also offer an add-on where I guess the answers to questions, i do not guarantee those for accuracy but can promise inaccurate ones will be funny whenever possible.

They are *aggressively* pursuing my husband to book a colonoscopy and while he as the Most Adherent Patient Ever is definitely going to do it… please back off until after we move into the 2-bathroom place 🤣🤣

Healthcare careers, once viewed as recession proof, are now unstable because the easiest ways for hospitals to cut costs is to cut labor.

Successful responsible adult tasks today: 2 completed, 1 in progress Responsible adult tasks failed today: 1 Every day I’m ahead is a good day! 🤣

your regular reminder that the national shoplifting crisis was a manufactured moral panic largely engineered by corporations in order to cover up their own mismanagement — and that wage theft is the largest category of theft in the U.S.

Here’s the abstract (full text is paywalled but the abstract is decently thorough) www.science.org/doi/10.1126/... I love that they used Am I The Asshole Reddit as examples of when humans tell other humans they’re in the wrong

I think I just learned why we called all cheese puffs style snacks “cheesies” growing up - another stealth Canadianism like Kraft Dinner

the only "bsky is a bubble" take you will ever need

No because they consider the Bills to be canadas team

“It’s not a maple store ☹️” got me

My cat has taken to sitting on my lap facing away from me and then silently but horrifically farting. Between this and the wee hours forehead grooming, I’m starting to suspect he secretly hates me…

Middle-aged behavior: I’m not putting makeup on to go out because I know I’m not going to be in the mood for the multi step removal process when I get home

Staffer: Rep. Kean is fine, he's vacationing with friends in The Hamptons

The danger was never an LLM "going rogue" and wiping a database. The danger is 𝗿𝗲𝗺𝗼𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗵𝘂𝗺𝗮𝗻 𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗰𝗸𝗽𝗼𝗶𝗻𝘁 𝗼𝗻 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗮𝗹 𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻. In code, a bad unsupervised commit means a broken build and a rollback.

I’m not even commenting on the study itself, this graphical abstract is an all-timer on its own. www.jacc.org/doi/10.1016/...

It’s very 2020s NYC that we had three 90° sunny weekdays and now will have a rainy 60° 3-day weekend

Everybody wish me luck waking up and getting out of the house for our 9am appointment to try to get banking references 🤣

Fun fact, the Brooklyn Starbucks cited in this article is right by my hairstylist! Also this is profoundly depressing to read

I know this isn’t a prompt but I saw @drsandman11.medsky.social’s gallery and realized I don’t show mine off a lot 🤣