…I’m feeling very attacked open.substack.com/pub/dmlavery...

Who gave this poor Newfie a lion cut, he didn’t deserve that

John Locke is having a conniption in his grave over these people, like do you WANT there to be no new books??? Because that’s how you get no new books

I had to change my psych appointment to a video call so I didn’t spread my lurgy, & I forgot that his video conferencing software has hold music while you’re waiting to be let into the call, which is a delight, but I also discovered one of them sounds like Last Christmas for some reason

Not me here opening youtube, seeing there’s a new 4+ hour Defunctland video & deciding I need to watch “grooming a big lazy Newfie” for half an hour first to get myself warmed up

I have a law degree & I barely know what that means (I don’t have the sort of law degree that uses “sui generis”, IP is bare Latin terms at best), shout out to him for just straight up asking lol

Ngl being fat with a bunch of problems that affect women more & are often written off as “anxiety” (see: fibro, POTS) has meant basically not trusting a doctor until they prove themselves worthy, & it’s only thanks to my absolute intolerance for actual Woo that I haven’t fallen into some weird scam

Look, it’s nice that the immunosuppressants have basically sent my Crohn’s into remission & I am grateful for that, but I am NOT grateful for every tiny cold or illness becoming a fucking production because my immune system’s like “well you told us we were working too hard so now we’re on strike”

Mmm today’s level of sickness is “chest just made a noise like an accordion when I took a breath” so uhhh let’s just hope this doesn’t turn into pneumonia again, that sucked balls

The bit about gambling really bummed me out too, like them describing what they thought it might look like & the Roblox guy being like “yeah we’d be super into that! Sounds great!” & the interviewer being like “oh no I think it’s a horrible idea, I was hoping you’d agree” like god same

Um anyway so update: we sold our house, for around what everyone said we’d get if not a little more, with a 9 month settlement so we have lots of time to sort out our stuff/next steps, & with the clause that we can just take what we want & anything we’d chuck they’ll clean out, so it’s a p good deal

I’m finally doing the “before you use it” run on our new oven, & they were not in fact kidding when they said “make sure you ventilate the room”, I’m also really glad I didn’t give in to my impulse to just ignore those instructions & use it bc it smells CRAZY, like burnt polymer clay

I haven’t gotten a Charles coin before now, actually quite weird tbh

Update I do think my dad is worried I’m going to kill myself because he insisted on coming back to Sydney this weekend & I didn’t want to be like “I need processing time alone” when he seemed so concerned, but…I do kind of need processing time alone

I love to be mid serious panic attack & think maybe if this doesn’t stop I’ll hyperventilate to death & that would solve a lot of my problems, v cool, love how shit everything is right now

I think I successfully scared off the real estate agent by immediately saying “you can look all you want but we’re not going to be selling it for a while yet”, & the couple looking to buy it I think definitely got the “we were kind of pushed into this” vibe I was putting down & backed off lol

Did I mention I’ve had a real cracker of a headache brewing since last night, & it’s now at “partly numb partly trapped in a vice”, so I do pity this real estate agent I have been given permission to get shirty with, he’s not exactly getting my most charming self right now

Re: LRT: Literally on Friday the NDIS planning person I had a meeting with was like “you seem like you don’t have a lot of trouble communicating!” & I had to be like yes, but that is bc of YEARS of masking & teaching myself scripts for situations, & also you should see me in a job interview…Bad

thing about autism is if you work really hard for many years, you can learn through trial-and-error how to navigate social situations and interpersonal connections SO effectively that people don't really believe you're autistic anymore and resent you for not being perfect at nonverbal communication

I think this could work

When I first looked at this I thought “surely that’s not John Waters…oh it is”, & then I thought about it some more & I was like yeah actually that makes sense, spiritually their artistic outputs are not dissimilar & I would now like an essay that discusses that theory

"Remembering Alice Wong: Writer, Advocate, Friend" Steven W. Thrasher on Meeting and Collaborating with the Outspoken Founder of the Disability Visibility Project published by @literaryhub.bsky.social | art by @mollycrabapple.bsky.social lithub.com/remembering-...

We agreed to let the pushiest real estate agent bring a builder through the house today & my dad texted me this morning like “hey can you get him to back off” so now I’m trying to phrase that in a way that isn’t “sorry but the vibes are rancid”, which is true but possibly a little harsh

In the first of many times this will likely happen, I booked an appointment at 10am with Curtin’s accessibility office…not realising that it meant I was booking it at 10am Perth time, so it’ll be 3 hours later here, so of course they didn’t call me at 10am here, it’s 7am there

people don't even notice how at the beginning of the last chapter of The Lord of the Rings, Frodo defunds the police

(My beginner German is not really helping because I haven’t learned words like “cockeyed” & “pitiable” yet, so I get like…”mother” & “soup” & “dark” without the surtitles but anything too fantastical or complex I’m lost)

Someone is wearing the merch of the band to the show (wearing a QPAC Ring Cycle tshirt to this Wagner concert), extreme classical music cringe

The phone usage during this show is next level, like the people next to me keep scrolling through Instagram & it’s like…even if you don’t want to watch the orchestra, there are visuals going on! How are you unable to focus on this for like 40 min at a time?? Get it together guys!

Someone near me is wearing SO much Santal 33 & I had to stop wearing it a few years ago because it made me sneeze, so you can imagine how that’s going for me while it’s mixed with the smell of popcorn, the food I also love but cannot experience

The concentration of both autism & gays at the Stardew Valley Orchestra show is at maximum capacity, like the amount of rainbows & noise cancelling headphones/stimming in this crowd is probably the most I’ve ever seen in one place

I cannot think of anything I’d want more than to speak to my mum again, but I also cannot think of any way I’d like to do that less than this, it creeps me the fuck out, possibly even more so bc my mum could barely send a text so the idea of trapping her in a device she hated is beyond ghoulish

oh goddammit

[To the tune of Pretty Woman by Roy Orbison] 🎵Baba Yaga 🎵Walking down the street 🎵Baba Yaga 🎵House with chicken feet 🎵Baba Yaga

You ever just…forget to take all your night meds, stay awake til 4:30am because by the time you realised it was too late, get like half your normal amount of sleep at half your normal sleep quality then have to go have people harass you about selling your house? No? Just me?

In every appointment with employment services I’ve told them if they can find me a basic office admin job I’m willing to take it at this point, like I KNOW they can’t find me anything using my qualifications but just like…data entry? & nope, absolutely not, they just tell me to keep looking myself

I have the most wonderful story for you all today: baby alligator spotted in Charles River, then immediately rescued by local reptile enthusiast

Next cross stitch project: large hunk of black on black stitching, because I love to suffer apparently (it’s a cat in a bottle eventually, but I have to get through the black cat body first & it is VERY hard on the eyes, nowhere near as contrasting as it looks here

Yeah nah

is transvestigation bad? yes is it funny that it’s now happening to one of the loudest and most violent anti-trans voices outside of legacy media? also yes

Today’s estate agent walked into our living room & was like “look at all this mould! It’s not good for your health!” like no shit Jackie why do you think we’re trying to move out, I don’t live in a black mould growth farm for kicks

Oh bless, I got an NDIS woman who opened the conversation with “I’m new, so you know, apologies if I don’t know things” & at the end was like “I’ve learned so much from talking to you, thank you!”, I was like great, I hope you get used to being interrupted bc the autists fucken love to do that shit

Despite realising last night I’d made a mistake that would take at least half an hour to unpick & redo, & then deciding I’d just work around it, I have managed to complete my first Christmas present cross stitch (no one involved has an account here, it’s not going to ruin a surprise)

After getting a vague idea from most of these agents about how much our house would go for I started looking at whether I could get something close to what I would want with that & unfortunately found my dream house, it has 2 bedrooms AND a separate studio www.realestate.com.au/property-hou...

Anyway my dad interviewed for & got a new contract today, & the NDIS actually rang me to set up a planning meeting, so a small part of my constant anxiety has been partially lifted, maybe I won’t die from constant tension after all

Me sending my accommodation paperwork over to Curtin: I have an appointment tomorrow, here is the stuff for it Me 20 seconds later, looking more closely at the confirmation text/email, frantically emailing a second time: I’m so sorry it’s actually on Monday, is that further proof I need your help

This is so fucking wild to me, like I know I’m extremely privileged in that I could already read at a basic level when I started school due to having voracious readers for parents, but I can’t imagine using this technique at any point, like how is just guessing every word useful???

Look, sometimes I’m not on the same page as my GP, but yesterday we were discussing Ozempic & when I told him my gastro strongly recommended I go on it bc I’m fat & am going to die (barely paraphrasing tbh) he made the same face I did & was like “you…know you wouldn’t lose much weight on it right?”

I got my new passport today & they’ve really gone off with the design lately haven’t they, this little laser etched see through copy of the photo is particularly funny to me but the kangaroos engraved on the back are also very fun

After the men who brought our last appliance came 3 hours after the assigned window I was fully expecting the oven man to be here at 6-7pm, but I think he got here 5 min BEFORE the delivery window of 3pm, & did not have a friend to laugh at my house in Māori with so all in all a vast improvement

every single week they're throwing this guy a special oval office love-in that appears to be the presidential equivalent of letting your dog scarf an entire big mac and fries before that last trip to the vet