i recently gained access to the last Cray supercomputer owned by the CIA. Last used at Langley to calculate the solubility of LSD in coffee, I fed 10 years of posts into this profoundly evil machine. it produced a map of internet discourse hell designed to make any who gaze upon it go mad with rage

MASSIVE FUCKUP: there’s a new 4K streaming restoration of Twin Peaks and in the pilot episode you can see the reflection of a scary-looking crew member in a mirror. how did they screw this up so badly?

Oh yeah, at work someone advised me to remove em dashes from something I’d written because it implies AI wrote it. So now this shit between me and AI is fuckin personal

this giving tuesday, give money to a trans person

waiting to talk to an amex representative via their chat feature and the timer to get connected to a representative keeps resetting to longer wait times and all i can think of is this

hire @gussie.bsky.social to illustrate the people animals sandwiches etc you love! DM on instagram @ _anghost or email

maxx morando?

why does the guy holding the pipe device look like lana del rey’s husband

day 1 is "penzeys revolution blend" and i cant stop laughing at "we have to GET RID of this lying, cheating, CORRUPT SCUMBAG PRESIDENT!! RESIST! REVOLT! REVOLUTION NOW!! good on roast poultry and carrots"

the worst of Trump's crimes is turning the FBI into a laughingstock department that nobody trusts to administer justice

literally what could go wrong when a tool famous for pushing youths into suicidal ideations starts monetizing those pushes

they should have given goransson another oscar just for “trucks in place” from the tenet soundtrack

netflix buying WB is perhaps not great but paramount buying them will give us 15 new versions of FBI and CSI but with the HBO veneer and i want that less

finally the 3 bed 7 bath house we all dream of

i bought a pair of sennheiser HD660S2s during their BF sale and i’m no audiophile but i can’t believe this level of audio fidelity was available for commoners (i mostly use speakers and / or airpod pros otherwise)

fighting for my life against the persistent and insistent intrusive thought

definitive rankings of when a cigarette hits best: 1. after sex 2. the first cigarette after a little break because the surgeon told you to stop smoking prior to surgery 3. when you step out at the bar & catch a light from a hot woman 4. with your morning coffee 5. after a couple of ice cold brews

tried some fancy-ish hot chocolate and now i’m afraid for my bank account

Chaser Obama

Reboot of The Picture of Dorian Gray in which the portrait not only ages but also spits on Dorian, called The Spitting Image of Dorian Gray

no one’s buying their colleague a pair of $400 headphones nymag. bffr

every year i look forward to the glorious window of time when i can participate in toyotathon (yes i buy a new taco truck every year) but the tariffs have made it untenable this time. thanks mr. president

One of my favorite things is getting to tell friends who are new to NYC that the subway "stand clear of the closing doors please" voice is a trans woman named Bernie Wagenblast and she's amazing.

the past few days candace owens has been claiming that the french have put out a hit on her & there’s possible conspiring with israel as a result of her spending the last nearly two years transvestigating brigitte macron

You come to me on this, the day of my daughter’s Toyotathon

I have been looking at Black Friday sales for a week but I do not actually need anything so instead I closed all those tabs and bought a Polaroid for a foster kid in Florida who uses photography to deal with big feelings. Perhaps you would like to do the same for one of the kids at the link below?

brought on by my slower than anticipated recovery after bottom surgery i have committed to the projector in the bedroom lifestyle and unfortunately this is absolutely incredible

don't threaten me with a really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really good time

people are reading "catch-and-kill" in the journalistic sense but she was probably just finding raccoons for him to eat

a classic tweet for the occasion (i cannot in good conscience add alt text for this)

lmao you already knew she fucked someone she was covering, and that’s one of the things you absolutely can’t do as a journalist, so why does it matter if she’s done it more than once? You’re already in for a penny in for a pound, pun intended.

hmmm

30 rock did if first

i briefly forgot about BLONGKY but just went to text @dishooomm.bsky.social again and saw all our morning BLONGKY texts and am now cackling about BLONGKY again

that’s true we all know who the bottom is in that situation…. folks…..

first mistake was using an electric car kettle called BLONGKY pls

i’m not usually one to sincere post but i’m feeling the full weight of trans day of remembrance this year more so than i have in the past. i hope all their memories are a blessing to their loved ones, and that it gives the rest of us strength

middlebury college student lia smith killed herself one month ago after facing harassment for being a trans athlete you will not hear her name once on cable tv don’t let them erase her #TDOR #TransDayOfRemembrance

once the transphobia brainworms set in it’s over, your brain is doomed

🕯️ today is Trans Day of Remembrance. 🕯️ spend some time with the loved ones we’ve lost. www.transremembrance.org/in-memoriam

sorry to him but why would you look at the current iteration (not even getting into its past) of this agency and decide you still want to be part of it as a gay man lol (the lawsuit specifically outlines reinstatement as one of the demands)

i changed my profile picture to something cute last night but remembered this morning that you can’t lock your profile here to back to walt it is

say what you will about reddit, you don't get multi-year sagas like this anywhere else on the internet

okay i never looked into it because i don’t really care about michelin stars but i can’t believe it’s the literal tire man handing out these awards??????

i feel like even the most median of voters probably understands that this is just them returning to us a very small percentage of what we had to pay extra over the last few months

google is so fucking useless now lol i tried using multiple iterations of “wsj medicaid insurers + providers” to get their article on how medicaid insurers inflate their provider coverage and all google gave me was some shitty roll up by a third party website each time

cloudfare error affecting grindr damn sorry to all the horny gays

coming soon to amazon: DFOREED brand 3.7L V7 engine truck rated at 4.3 stars over 4732 reviews since it went on sale 2 weeks ago