Caught in the act! I spied a red bellied woodpecker couple at my birdfeeder!

Should Grant and I try and catch a Spurs game in New York City? The ticket prices look reasonable…….

Go Spurs Go!!!!

Strangling Cuba until it collapses into chaos, or launching a cinematic special-ops mission to rendition a 94-year-old autocrat, isn’t a strategy. It’s a weapon of mass distraction from Epstein, ICE, inflation, Iran, the J6 terrorist immunization fund … The real move is magnanimity.

My model predicts that over the next two months, the White House will announce between eight and fifteen Iran deals, all of which will be applauded by Fox News. And I tell you the best place in Guyana to buy Kool-Aid. All that and more in the next Silver Bulletin.

Andy Probert (1979)

Go Spurs Go!!!⚡️💫✨💥💥🏀🏀🏀🏀

DOJ Launches Criminal Investigation Into All Women

Woman Worried She In Codependent Relationship With Rest Of Humanity https://theonion.com/woman-worried-she-in-codependent-relationship-with-rest-of-humanity/

Someone is triggered today.

@elisabethinwa.bsky.social this is actually starting out strong.

I attracted a woodpecker! app.mybirdbuddy.com/media/dallas...

Meth futures rise on anticipation of payouts to January 6th felons.

Shai Gilgeous-Alexander Trying To Draw Foul While Shooting Free Throw

Slush Fund Follow my work and writing on Substack: nickanderson.substack.com For @contrariannews.org

I have defeated the squirrels. I’m having trouble with the doves.

Go Spurs Go!!!!!

If you see this post your getaway vehicle

Go spurs go!!!!

I’m pro-freedom, pro-law and order, pro-limited government, and pro-the Declaration and the Constitution. And so today I’m a Democrat.

THANK YOU David Letterman & Stephen Colbert for a lifetime of smart satire, laughs, speaking truth to power & sending us to bed with a smile on our collective faces. You will be missed. 🙏 #EndOfAnEra

“‘Decline is a choice,’ Charles Krauthammer famously said. Donald Trump has chosen decline for the United States, and his trip to China was confirmation of that fact.” www.thebulwark.com/p/youre-gett...

MAGA Voter Claims She Loves High Gas Prices https://theonion.com/maga-voter-claims-she-loves-high-gas-prices/

I gotta say, I kind of lost it here discussing the extraordinary Trump Cabinet of unmitigated jackasses. Luckily Tim stayed calm, cool, and collected. youtu.be/XHO7uwbXE0Y?...

Taylor Swift Adds Additional Wedding Dates In L.A., Miami, Boston https://theonion.com/taylor-swift-adds-additional-wedding-dates-in-l-a-miami-boston/

Other than discovering that I’m apparently John Oliver’s son, @lastweektonight.com’s deep dive into the shadow docket is really quite good: www.youtube.com/watch?v=qKeq...

The greatest war movies of all time? Who better to ask than @markhertling.bsky.social Another fantastic conversation about film with @sonnybunch.bsky.social www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ldht...

Breakfast In Bed Served To Mom Who Just Got Eaten Out https://theonion.com/breakfast-in-bed-served-to-mom-who-just-got-eaten-out-1819574958/

The Russian Navy held a #VictoryDay parade in the Black Sea.

The alien is on our side

Ukraine’s adaptations. My latest in @thebulwark.com

Embarrassed David Attenborough Realizes He Spent 10 Minutes Describing Stillness Of Duck Decoy https://theonion.com/embarrassed-david-attenborough-realizes-he-spent-10-min-1851512951/

Go spurs go!!!

We live in a time dominated by deeply unserious people making deeply unserious arguments in support of tragically serious results that serious people would have both avoided and known to avoid.

ICE Taps BTK Killer To Design New Migrant Detention Center https://theonion.com/ice-taps-btk-killer-to-design-new-migrant-detention-center/

Last July, the pope called his bank in South Chicago. He wanted to update the phone number on his account. The teller told him that any changes had to be made in person with an ID. Knowing that was impossible, he asked: “Would it matter to you if I told you I’m Pope Leo?” She hung up on him.

¡Que tengas un feliz Cinco de Mayo! 🇲🇽 🇺🇸 ¡Viva México!" Have a great one, Los Angelenos... ...¡unless you're full of Sith!

Epidemiologists Confirm First Airborne Transmission Of Mar-A-Lago Face https://theonion.com/epidemiologists-confirm-first-airborne-transmission-of-mar-a-lago-face-2/

In this Indiana diner, everyone has three questions: How's the breaded tenderloin? Is the quarry hiring? And is Rudy getting enough Ivermectin?

Go Spurs go!!

Textbook gaslighting. Bravo? 🤷‍♂️

Military experts say that Iran's military is largely intact. A guy who beats his girlfriends and drinks a pint of gin before breakfast says that Iran's military capacity has been completely destroyed by American's maximum lethality. For busy Americans, it can be hard to know who to trust.

Supreme Court Overturns ‘Right v. Wrong’ https://theonion.com/supreme-court-overturns-right-v-wrong-1819573211/