In football, the goals are big and the balls are bouncy. No other sport capitalises on this alchemical formula, and no tactics will quench its fire.

Having a Mandela effect mental breakdown here: I have always known "whiles and wends" as an idiom for meandering at a leisurely pace. Independently, "while away" and "wend its way" are common but I can find only two pages on the whole internet using "whiles and wends" that isn't about BASIC.

Seventh with zero goal difference is basically the platonic ideal of an Everton team to me.

Ah, Catherine O'Hara, fuck. Spectacular emotional and physical range, such a complete comedian.

We are deeply saddened at the news of the passing of Magic legend Kai Budde. His achievements in the game and community go beyond what we could say in one post. Our thoughts go out to Kai's friends and family in this moment. Remembering Kai Budde: magic.wizards.com/en/news/anno...

If you dedicate your thesis to Cristiano Ronaldo, they simply shouldn’t award you a degree, sorry.

Why do bash falcon for the widening gyre but we never question if the falconer has bad vibes? Or if he’s just unpleasant to be around?

Gonna miss all these chunky knits on Traitors.

The best way to understand TTRPG discourse is to imagine a bunch of carnivores and a bunch of vegans arguing about which restaurant has the best cutlery.

Been noodling with my own TTRPG rules lately cos I’ve been a bit bored DMing D&D5e for kids and lemme tell you now: the meta is Drunken Master Centaur Monk.

We are witnessing the birth of an icon

I don't know what deeply suppressed trauma this triggers, but literally nothing makes me as incandescent with rage as a delivery driver lying that they've been to my house. I understand the untenable position they must be placed in by their employers, and by extension capitalism, but gimme my stuff.

Had a dream the other night that I won a competition and for some reason the prize was spending a day with Kevin Mirallas. It was really awkward and we ended up sat silently watching a bunch of highlight reels on YouTube.

Great summary of past and present study of the Herculaneum papyri from Richard Janko. #ancientbluesky youtu.be/rmXM6qh18B0?...

RIP MTV. The song I most associate with its golden age: youtu.be/fxvkI9MTQw4?...

Bluetooth keyboard powered down while playing some cube, and so holding Ctrl and activating Lion's Eye Diamond with Ancestral Recall in hand to draw my game winning Doomsday pile did not go how I planned, but my Christmas spirit remains undefeated (as did my ninjas/Doomsday deck).

As of the latest DLC, this is quite a good Crusader Kings III strategy.

This should not be possible.

Counterpoint: all club owners should own gambling syndicates. In fact there should be mandatory minimums in terms of net worth invested. This would fairly quickly eliminate all owners that knew fuck all about football.

my complete, map-filled, analysis of the 2025 election in New York City -How Zohran won the primary -How Zohran won the general (different story!) -How this election, beneath the surface, actually offers some of the best evidence of a developing blue wave www.expectinggoals.com/p/how-zohran...

It’s happening again.

Drafted a standard deck.

Christmas number one if someone puts the words to Debaser over Troika.

How Gamefaqs changed RPG consumption: an history of RPG walkthroughs, from clue books and hearsay to the digital age #rpg #wrpg #jrpg #crpg #gamefaqs #walkthrough #nintendopower #videogamehistory #gaming #gamedev #rpghistory open.substack.com/pub/magnvsrp...

the sheffield sound in music is "we are horny and upset about being horny, in sheffield"

#MTGTLA with an extremely fun upgrade to my extremely silly Merfolk deck. #MTG

Every time I walk past this headstone in the graveyard I think to myself “yeah… we know”

I call this First-Picked-a-Lotus-but-Had-to-Keep-Answering-the-Door-to-Trick-or-Treaters-Storm". Other than mising with Minsc & Boo, my theory was I could Underworld Breach and use Wheel of Fortune and Endurance to deck them out. But the trick or treaters kept coming and Arena clock is unforgiving.

Had to use Tishana's Tidebinder twice in the same turn to counter my awful plays. Drew my whole deck with Displacer Kitten and Coveted Jewel. Cast Upheaval & for some reason blinked Jewel so had to counter its ability to not draw from an empty deck, then afterwards misclicked Mightstone & Weakstone.

Cube on Arena appears to be 99% Boros fun police. Ended up going back to Magic Online to actually have some interesting games.

I used to work at a small shop that made little plastic vampires. There were only 2 of us working there, so I had to make every second count.

It's half term, so FM26 is getting until the release of Powered Cube on Arena on Tuesday to prove itself. So far: almost everything is worse, but it lets you start as an even more wretched, unemployed loser than previous games which is all that matters.

Forums with reputation points are like savings accounts you occasionally dip into to call someone a cunt.

For the first time ever, behold the soaring elegance of ‘Fly of the Valkyries’ – a new operatic automaton from Modern Toss, making its debut at our Sheffield exhibition. OPEN NOW! Got your ticket yet? Sort yourself out on bio, cheers...

Should Urborg make Multiversal Passage a Swamp in addition to the type you chose? #mtg

The apotheosis of UW control in cube is winning every game with 5 cards in your library, 7 cards in your hand, and zero creatures on your opponent's side. (Lutri in the side, naturally)

⚽️ Founders in football performance and fan experience solutions - Burnley FC has launched the Burnley FC Innovation Hub, a Premier League testbed for sports tech startups to pilot, prove, and scale in a 6-month programme. Applications close 31 October.

TiVo, New Labour before the mask came off, Xbox (Burnout and Burnout 2!), Windows XP, KDE 3, Simpsons on the BBC.

I can excuse war criminals backed by tech billionaires being granted unchecked power, but I draw the line at calling the Gaza International Transitional Authority "Gita", because it has somehow reminded me of this hauntingly bad line reading from An Evening With Gary Lineker (1994):

Dr. Chris Stride is a statistician at the University of Sheffield - he’s also behind the Baseball Statues Database. In this interview, we chat trends that popped up over the years, what kinds of players get statues and what kinds don't. thefanfiles.com/articles/baseball-statues-history-database

The Catholic Church's birthday message to Jeffrey Epstein.

RIP Zach Galifianakis

Happens all the time, a one-time Football Manager wonderkid retires and you feel infinitely old. But it hits different when they were a top prospect in one of your real-life defensive metrics a decade ago.

I'm 45 and still feel illicit glee when I stumble upon a treasure trove of conkers.

Contact anxiety from helping my nephew with last minute maths homework. To this day I can’t see the actor John Nettles without having a mild panic attack because Bergerac used to be on Sunday nights as I ploughed through the accumulated pile of work.

I wrote a sonnet about products, machines, and various other "things":

Few people have contributed more to my enjoyment of showers than Melvyn Bragg. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

Trump dying/drip doctors crossover tweet… anything there?

The 'secret' w.a.s.t.e. fan club gig Radiohead did at the Astoria in 1997. I maintain I was the only one that knew the words to Motion Picture Soundtrack.

1. Crush your enemies 2. See them driven before you 3. Hear the lamentations of their women