I stood behind Victor Ebuwa from BB5 in a queue for a cashpoint at the services

Please never forget that Gregg Wallace headbutted my friend’s brother, in a pub in Putney

Knock knock Who’s there? Adam Peaty’s mum. I’m not at the wedding party. I wasn’t invited

I think @beige23.bsky.social said it best.

Have come on here to say for your eyes only is on and I miss @eatmyhalo.bsky.social

Potato farmer dick on twitter!

Live Aid is strangely addictive

Alan Yentob is dead

Hope everyone’s MMH is ok

Snooker paedo on the loose!

Well, I’ve told them over there already. Had my patio jet washed by two young women and they did a great job and it was £200 less than some chancer quotes. Great result for my MMH

You know that advert for The Bay on ITVX where she goes ‘you just snuffed it out!!’? - I can’t stop saying it

Hope everyone having a pleasant Mother’s Day

Looking in on Bluesky like

Trump forever playing his invisible accordion

Grammy coverage, though

Greatly enjoying back in action. Big dumb fun

Dodgy were SHIT

Charity shop madness.

When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. Then I had a midlife crisis and bought all my childish things again off of Ebay.

Posted this on Twitter - If bbc breakfast studio was invaded by terrorists who do you think would emerge as a die hard style hero? Shagger Stayt dies heroically. Mike Bushell wets himself. The business guy gets killed. But the weatherman emerges as quiet tough guy who bumps them all off & snogs Naga

can't believe Lord Sugar said bums

That being said, it seems like there are a few lengers so

Sir our plan to replace the entire government with 4chan freaks has run into a few snags

Everyone gripped by Apprentice fever? The 2010s are over!

Colder than Amanda Holden's dead shark eyes out there.

Is there where everyone is

I keep forgetting about this place

it’s colder than a step mother’s cuddle

Watching Gino & Fred having problematic banters

Well, I miss some of you. But old habits die hard

Get yourself back to Twitter - by order of the Peaky Blinders!

In the Southern Hemisphere, I Know What You did Last Summer is a Christmas movie.

Gripped by Gout Gout fever

GK Barry was robbed!

It’s dead over there. Sad!

Forgot about Bluesky!

Been to see Homo Alone at the theatre. Very silly

Gregggg

Please never forget that Gregg Wallace headbutted my friend’s brother, in a pub in Putney

Keep having to rewrite the same treatment. Boiling my wee

rolled up cigarette blanket

Just grinding out the days til Xmas RN. No real love for the corporate life. Come back in 25 & try again

Hi

Everyone enjoying themselves - by order of the Peaky blinders?

I’m working at the David Lloyd #corporate