You think you know your partner of many years, until one day you’re watching Ke Huy Quan quote the lyrics of “Absolutely (Story of a Girl)” and they don’t immediately laugh in recognition.

I think it’s great, personally, that Peacock’s stream constantly stutters and its audio drops wildly out of sync every time there’s a commercial break.

$500 to get a diagnosis of “tummy hort”

When you scritch a cat’s chin and the base of the tail at the same time, call that the screenshot

It was — and I don’t think this has ever justifiably been said before — offensive to Bostonians.

What's the most you ever lost on a coin toss? Anton Chigurh here for FanDuel,

Breaking: Tragedy at the Winter Olympics

production of The Muppet Show should not be dependent on petty vulgarities like “ratings” or “revenue.” it should be preserved as a vital function of american culture. it should have a taxpayer-funded budget rivaling the CIA

All my brain is doing from now until Monday is, “I’m not a real doctor but I AM A REAL, I AM AN ACTUAL WORM”

Crap, I use this for checking basic stuff when I edit international stories.

journalists are workers who deserve to be paid fairly for our labor and I think that far too few consumers of media recognize or even care about this fact

Many people who think they can get news anywhere still care about sports, and sports fans want coverage focused on *their* team. For local and regional outlets, fans mean subscriptions, clicks, shares. Killing the sports desk cuts revenue and makes you just another national outlet in a sea of them.

This cat saw the time knife

I was trying to read some screen grab from the Epstein files when my cat came over and rubbed his face on my phone, closing the image. Honestly, dude, here’s a Churu, thanks for protecting my sanity.

We need to keep the cat out of the kitchen for a bit, so we set up a 5’ tall baby gate. Today I heard a loud bang and looked up to see a furious cat being removed from the top of the gate (see artist’s re-creation). Apparently he can jump 5’ straight up.

Doubt I’ll win any awards but I think I got there eventually.

Once again googling “how to braid 6-strand loaf”

Being a journalist is sick: I just contacted a pre-eminent jaguar conservationist in Argentine with a question that has been weighing on me for ages and he wrote back right away with an informed answer.

Listen. If you can't work up the energy to make a whole meal, eating the elements of a meal also counts A couple slices of ham, a slice of cheese, and a slice of bread is a deconstructed sandwich

Cold enough out that I kept my mask on outdoors just so I’d be breathing warm air.

Once again I am enjoying “The Menu.” Simply never not delighted when “The Menu” is happening in front of my eyeballs.

this rules so much

The best thing about shitty Plymouth Rock is that there’s absolutely no evidence it’s actually the right rock. 120 years after the pilgrims, some guy in the town was like “oh yeah my dad told me this is the rock”

As the world burns, let's get one thing straight. A video podcast is just a TV show.

The security guard M. Emmet Walsh plays in “Knives Out” is, I just noticed, credited as Mr. Proofroc. Seems like a lovely reference for a veteran character actor.

They need to start selling this stuff in giant tubs because I can’t stop putting it on popcorn shop.kingarthurbaking.com/items/better...

My hometown: We’re gonna put street signs in title case instead of all caps so they’re not yelling at you anymore. 😊😊 The signs:

"If you start this movie at 10:02 PM, then right at midnight--" buddy I am pausing that movie 47 minutes in to get cookies and use the bathroom, midnight happens when I say it does

Gonna watch “The Apartment” and then “Clue” and go to bed at 12:06 like the party animal I am.

Took me a looooong time to figure out what word ending in “-nicate” was meant to be here.

To refuse to comment and then slam the press for what it prints is a transparent effort to discredit and sow doubt. That's another reason why, in this line of work, you bend over backwards for comment, and make it clear that you did.

Sometimes, when reporters don’t get a response to a request for comment, we’ll bend over backwards to reach someone — even going to their home or sending letters. Quick thread on why we do that.🧵

“Oh god, it’s 4 a.m.? It’s OK, I can still get back to sleep, I just gotta relax.” My cat, one inch from my ear: “HAVE YOU TRIED MEDITATION”

The breakfast wanter

For the love of God, Montresor!

Watching “Home Alone” for the first time in, uuuuuh, probably 30 years and had to stop and breathe into a paper bag when they said their flight was leaving in 45 minutes

As many of us begin Christmas meal prep, allow me to share the advice that my ER nurse sister puts in the chat every year: A dropped knife has no handle. Jump away. Let it fall. You can pick it up and wash it.

Special offer! Ask a current or recovering theater kid the date today and give them a free earworm.

Someone was surprised The New York Times has lawyers. Every newsroom has lawyers! I am willing to bet the Times has more than most but pretty much every place has one, or at least one they can call, and this is exactly why.

Btw this is one of the biggest reasons why it’s not as easy as people think to start up independent newsrooms or just be an indie journalist on substack. If you are actually holding powerful and rich people to account, you WILL need legal representation. Not a matter of whether but when

Heads up: If you get an email from a a “recruiter” about a ProPublica proofreader job, that is fake. But we ARE hiring a copy editor, as you can see on our jobs page: job-boards.greenhouse.io/propublica

So, what breed IS your cat? None. (None breed, left beef.) Wha? How? Cat breeds are just NEW. Despite them living with us for thousands of years, we only have about 40-150 years of cat breeds existing, and they aren't out mixing with random cats. 97-99% of cats are breedless!

Spraying this in Kendall Square makes it art

'Tis the season for some festive science songs. If you've ever wanted to hear someone sing about a dimunitive tyranosaur then now is your chance

I might just listen to Sharon Jones on a loop until January.

Goodbye to Sterling, a beautiful himbo of a cat who was never for one moment troubled by thought. He loved belly rubs and being zipped into my hoodie. He ran for mayor and did not win. He was outwitted by a mouse. He nursed the air while he slept. Sadly his kidneys were as incompetent as he was.

Daytime brain: ugh I’m so sleepy, give me more coffee or, better yet, go lie down Bedtime brain: HEY WHAT TIME IS IT IN NEW ZEALAND WHY’D YOU SAY THAT THING AT THE PARTY DO YOU THINK WE CAN INVENT A NEW KIND OF SCONE I WONDER IF YOU CALLED THE NEIGHBOR BY HER DOG’S NAME AGAIN

walks through your feed banging a spoon on a pot and bellowing TWO PEOPLE CAN BE BAD AT ONCE, CRITICIZING ONE IS NOT DEFENDING THE OTHER