jimmy kimmel is back everybody reschedule your EPCOT weddings

wisdom teeth OUT autism pills IN

pro tip: use “in this economy?” as a catch-all excuse for any plans you’re trying to avoid

Italians disassociate and dat associate

Get in losers, we’re grieving

if comedy is illegal at least Bill Maher is safe

get good and read my latest @hard-drive.net

what did you do you son of a bitch?!

the older i get the more i envy him

the older i get the more i envy him

still waiting on the cotton-eyed joe origin story... where did he come from?

Bombshell ‘Wall Street Journal’ Investigation Finds Tyler Robinson Once Had Trans Uber Driver

fucking with scammers has got to be america’s favorite pastime

can’t believe i just noticed this! Piglet has anxiety Eeyore has depression Tigger has ADHD and Pooh has a great ass

Boat: Welcome aboard Plane: Thank you for flying with us Train: Hey, soul sister

Boat: Welcome aboard Plane: Thank you for flying with us Train: Hey, soul sister

Saying there was one year where they weren’t racist? More than generous

David Zaslav complaining about the TV consumer experience being terrible is like a tumor complaining that its host has died www.hollywoodreporter.com/business/bus...

hail to the chief

mf can only hide strokes on the golf course

being remembered for "open discussion" is a hilarious side-stepping of someone's actual opinions

Terrible timing. Things are intense now and we don’t need more hahaha misinformation. It adds to the stress. Reported.

oh my god he admit it

what an insane day of being on the internet

this must be the doing of radical left lunatics in *checks notes* Utah Valley?

Hello, I didn’t check the delivery address when I ordered some Chipotle delivery just now so if you are in Chicago and would like a chicken burrito go to: The Chicago Hotel Ambassador 1301 N State Pkwy Chicago, IL 60610 It’s at the front desk. Enjoy!

USB Device Hasn’t Been “Properly Ejected” in Years hard-drive.net/hd/video-gam...

give me liberty or give me unalive!

can’t fucking believe they paved paradise to put up a parking lot smh

RFK Jr. Claims He Can Tell a Child Is Unhealthy Just by Licking Them thehardtimes.net/culture/rfk-...

the eyepatch is the window to the soul patch

Most places don't actually need cops since everyone knows True Crime only takes place in New York City and the Streets of LA

"gen z doesn't want to work!" squawk boomers who put a down payment on their house with a crisp $50 bill

got the bluesky drafts in the notes app like a caveman

my T-Mobile employee tshirt stays ON during sex.

The Rock got a 15 minute standing ovation at a film festival? that’s nothing! this chair got a 45 minute ovation at the 2012 RNC

in 'O Brother where Art Thou?' (2000) an entire set piece takes place on Twitter

kermit puts up with miss piggy all the time cuz she's a fucking babe and he's a stone-cold horn dog

“playing golf” is the first thing they’d program a Trump-bot to do… 🤔

nah, it’s cool, i didn’t even want to be a homeowner

whoever said “don’t judge a book by its cover” never saw this

cut my life into pieces—

its almost that wonderful time of the year where society embraces and celebrates BONES!

how do i explain to my cat that i'm gluten free, and that the biscuits she makes on my belly gives me debilitating IBS?

do you even feel the beat bro

go see Weapons (2025) and let me know if you think it’s too scary for me