It is a tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing.

Operation Epstein Fury

There is no amount of money in the world that would lead me to fight a Vietnamese refugee that grew up in Louisiana (Also I really want to try a Korean style Po’ Boy)

You know who I feel bad for? Any guy named Al.

I regret to inform you that the Secretary of Defense is an idiot

crying in the club* (*at my desk) bc stanley tucci took the USA women's hockey team out for a meal at his favorite restaurant and they gave him his own jersey

@tampabaytimes.bsky.social Y'all got any copy editors left? #copyediting

Bay of Dumbasses

Timothée Chalamet, Wes Anderson, Tilda Swinton, and Bill Murray

Folks, if you're needing a State of the Union bingo-drinking card, @diedrichbader.bsky.social has you covered. 🧵

@kairyssdal.bsky.social Any chance you might post your entire hour with Raphael Bostic on the @marketplace.org website? Seventeen minutes wasn't enough.

any waxed apple

When your metaphors become a cocktail. (derogatory)

La Retraite de Hugues de Payens, by Georges Mathieu, 1958 (rotated), 📸 by @tiltoncreative

I will never unknow this.

“Jewish religious mohels” “You must make a legal provision to allow Jewish religious MOHELS to perform their duties here in Belgium,” Mr. White added, addressing the Belgian health minister.

Recent CBS News news: 1. Anderson Cooper leaves 60 Minutes after two decades 2. Stephen Colbert reveals network won’t let him air interview with Dem 3. Producer says politics dictating what airs 4. Owner’s bid for CNN parent back on the table. 5. Not firing Epstein pal.

You should watch this for many reasons, most important of which is your Federal Government does not want you to watch it.

Good 🧵

If you’re familiar with administrative warrants, meet administrative subpoenas.

In which I trot the globe; or, there and back again.

“She’s not from here.”

As someone who grew up on a farm with 30,000 layers, I just want to say that BUCK is NOT they sound a chicken makes.

Kristi Noem: "When it gets to Election Day, we've been proactive to make sure we have the right people voting, electing the right leaders to lead this country."

NEW: Hundreds of judges around the country have ruled more than 4,400 times since October that President Donald Trump’s administration is detaining immigrants unlawfully, a Reuters review of court records found. The government keeps doing it nonetheless. www.reuters.com/legal/govern...

Facebook plans to put facial recognition in its glasses and they think we’re too stupid to fight back. Their internal memo: “We will launch during a dynamic political environment where many civil society groups that we would expect to attack us would have their resources focused on other concerns.”

BONDI: You didn't ask Merrick Garland anything about Epstein BALINT: Weak sauce BONDI: And with this antisemitic culture right now, she voted against a resolution-- BALINT: You want to go there! Really? Talking about antisemitism to a woman who lost her grandfather in the Holocaust! *storms off*

Shot, and one-hell-of-a-chaser.

I need someone – maybe @gregdoucette.bsky.social – to please explain how this conflicts (or doesn’t) with NC being a one-party consent state.

we need to talk about that Ring Super Bowl ad

Team USA Curler Rich Ruohonen: "We'd be remiss if we didn't at least mention what's going on in Minnesota...I am a lawyer, as you know, and we have a constitution... and what's happening in Minnesota is wrong. There's no shades of gray. It's clear."

Anyone else noticed this? WTF are they saying?

Oh FFS

good morning www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6Fu...

#BadBunny's performers continued to dance and party outside the stadium after the #SuperBowl #HalftimeShow

Bad Bunny understood the assignment…

You could think of Bad Bunny’s triumphant Super Bowl set as a tribute to the power and capaciousness of American popular music—or as a pointed critique of it. newyorkermag.visitlink.me/2s4iCg

🧵

This photo. 🥹

‼️

No Kings includes Draft Kings

YHGtBFKMwtS

If Breezy Johnson’s nickname isn’t Commando, then what are we even doing?

Full story: apnews.com/article/immi...

Two notes to Olympic watchers and commentators: It’s Francesca Lollobrigida, not Lollabrigida (same for Gina). The Italian flag is green, white, and red, not red, white, and green.

"Golden snake with gold eyes and a super super-duper long tail," welcome to The War on Cars.

who called it Heated Rivalry and not Fuck Ice

Ronnie spends $608M to build Alligator Alcaraz and support the ICE capades. Donnie stiffs Ronnie.

The thing with so many of these fucks is that by a singular measure–wealth–they are successful, but by every other imaginable measure they are abject failures, and above all failures as human beings.