i gotta be in somebody's top 5 of funniest people that they know

if a girl posts her man and you go add him, you’re a weirdo.

tinkerbell & the gals forgot their dishes😭

i rebuke any evil tongue speaking, thinking, and wishing negativity against me.

SHE clocks in more then SHE hangs out, i am SHE & SHE is ME. 💰😭

“what are you thinking abt?” me: “nothing” the nothing:

can someone throw a blanket over my cage? i’m overstimulated

me in another life

when i die don’t be kissing my forehead in the coffin with your cocksuckin lips

Me: I have so much to do today. Also me: *procrastinates*

She would be perfect if she wasn't so fucked up

my friends are so lucky i can't do a backflip, i'd be so fuckin annoying

my bad. i was in a silly goofy mood.

girl throw them crystals away and pick up a glock.🙄 make him feel ur energy fr

i’m so hungry i could eat a hardworking man that takes pride in providing for his woman right now 🙂‍↔️

reproductive rights are human rights. black and trans lives matter. i stand with Ukraine and with Palestine. if you think differently on these, please block me. thank you.

ily guys ty for always being so nice

DOJA CAT IS GETTING AN ICON SKIN SOON!

The mark of adulthood is breaking into your own house because you locked yourself out

hate when mfs make me be mean, bitch i had a pocket full of sunshine til u did that

that old disney love😍🥰

love a good jerry and rick team up

the feminine urge to say "i ate it" whenever someone tells me they lost something

when i say "you're nobody to lie to" i mean it in the most disrespectful way possible.

me after every minor inconvenience: “sometimes you gotta take that L”

my face when my bsf catches me up on the weekly chaos

It’s a beautiful day to touch ass.

Fuckery, fuckaroo, fuckity fuck fuck fuck. Fuck the duck and duck the fuck. Fuckity fuckity roo. Fuck.

Happy 39th birthday to the talented Emmy Rossum.

Deleting skeets post crashout is healing ok <3

After dousing our love in gasoline, you tried to convince me- I was the reason our love burned. Simply for holding the matches. #poems

i would survive The Ring because i dont answer phone calls. 😂

“that’s still your family” is how abuse gets normalized.

about damn time😭

"smoking isn't cute" idk bro l'm tryna be high not cute.

thank god it’s turning to the time of year that those flying spikey ass demons must return to whatever hell they emerged from.

every house has a smell that only the people living in the house don’t smell.

my type🙂‍↕️

giving him road head cause you’re feral and can’t wait until you get home 😩😇

some people talk about you because they lost the privilege to talk to you

i could bite a jawbreaker in half when i’m mad. 😭

not now kitten, daddy is hyper aware of every inch of fabric touching his skin

i smell weed in public and i start sniffing around like i’m scooby doo looking for a scooby snack 🤣