Pokémon coming for the US government was not on my 2025 bingo card but I am SO here for it

Lowkey hate the term "high functioning" bc just bc I can accomplish things does not mean that I'm not struggling the entire time :,)))

Genuinely never want to see a vape again

Ok so I'm not dying :,))) I talked to my doctor and it's a completely normal part of quitting unfortunately. As the body attempts to heal, it produces more mucus and makes the lungs feel heavier. It can also increase anxiety, which leads to tightening of the chest. Ill be fine :,)) eventually

Next time a man speaks to me, I'm challenging him to a duel

No, unfortunately I do *not* take constructive criticism and I will probably cry about it.

Somebody please explain to me how I can vape for *years* without any noticeable issues, but when I try to stop suddenly my lungs and chest hurt 😐🫩

Me: wow i'm such a bitch today :( *period shows up* Me: nvm it's not actually my fault💅✨️

Hobbies include yapping and telling men no.

When your safe food stops hitting the same and now you have to find a new hyperfixation meal in order to survive

Nighty night all, don't forget your tylenol

My kid just found my barbie charm bracelet from 2005😭💖

All that religious trauma and I didn't even get raptured 😟

Realizing that I don't actually hate pink/girly things, I just let the trauma consume me when the world destroyed my innocence at a young age and I was forced to "toughen up" to survive🥺💖🎀

Drinking chocolate milk instead of vaping

I need an adult version of this immediately

Ok chat I saw these at Dollar Tree and I know I had something similar growing up in the 90s/2000s that I LOVED but I can't remember exactly what brand it was😭

Just a cat meowing outside your bathroom door

This cannot be the same USA that Miley Cyrus was partying in

Eating a sandwich instead of vaping

Smoking a joint in the rain just to feel something

🫥

Quit buying big ass trucks if you can't drive them correctly 🤠

Drinking tea and not vaping

🕯️ 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯 no tummy ache 🕯 today 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯

swag, swag, swag on you chillin' by the fire while we eatin' fondue🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

Eating tofu & gaslighting myself

I would trust Doctor House before I trust RFK Jr & Dr. Oz

Just ate breakfast in an elementary school cafeteria... it was terrifying.

Turns out I actually don't have any problems eating as long as I have my safe foods on hand at all times

If they're going to make us all take vitamins, it better be in gummy form and a good fruit flavor

Starting tomorrow I am going to try to replace vaping with drinking an unholy amount of fruity tea.

Don't forget your nightly tylenol <33

I am no longer interested in compliance

Fuck u nicotine addiction

I want to quit vaping I want to quit vaping I want to quit vaping

3 old white dudes telling us what is and isn't good for pregnant women🧍‍♀️

Anybody with access to wiki has more medical knowledge than the US government rn😭😭

Cut my bangs so I'm a new person now

always have a back up plan

Ok chat, what are we wearing for the upcoming rapture???

I wonder how much Ticket Master is going to charge for rapture tickets

I will now be consuming a great amount of THC so that I can continue playing this vicious game of life

Vasectomies and circumcisions should also be without pain relief methinks

Cinnamon was chosen for a cutest cats of 2025 calender!! 😍🥰🐈 thepawprint.store/products/oct...

Next thing you know, they'll be refusing women pain relief during labor for "the sake of the baby"

Shit is genuinely so dystopian and I still have to work my silly little job, clean my silly little house, and pay my silly little bills like nothing is wrong🫥

"There is no downside to a woman not taking pain relief during pregnancy. She might have to tough it out, but there's no downside" Because women's suffering doesn't matter🤡

*children being shot in schools daily* US Government: THE TYLENOL