it’s all gonna be okay because it has to

shoutout to weed and water

hey, thank you for the lovely bouquet

i’d sell my soul to have a taste of a magnificent life that’s all mine

don’t ya sweat it, baby

dancin through the lightning strikes

i wish i was friends with a minion so i could take bong rips with bob.

i can make deals with the devil because my dick’s bigger

redefine all of those blues

…honey!

father bag is asleep i think i will celebrate by dissociating in a bubble bath in complete silence with all the lights off

keepin it pushin

banana slug club for life

i need to lay on the ground in an abandoned castle by the sea for a few days

the amount of phone calls being taken on speakerphone in this house is going to make me cry

last night i started singing like a minion and my friend did a real life spit take. it was awesome

glittery minion tramp stamp

minions bring joy

🎶 minion take me awaayyyy 🎶

i feel like a limp soggy noodle

🎶 I wanna be a minion baybeee 🎶

in the words of misty quigley: i took the red cross babysitter training course [nervous laughter]

nurse bag clocking in for the next ~2 months bc my brother leaves tomorrow morning and then i’m back on my own 🩺❤️‍🩹

thank you dot grid notebook i love you dot grid notebook

thank god i’m always ready to ask a million questions because i just got my dads prescriptions down from almost $800 down to $110 #theyboss

fuuuuuuck the american healthcare system

calling my dads heart surgery top surgery and telling him his tits look great

remember the silly things remember to listen to the birds remember to look for bugs remember to feel the sun on your skin remember to laugh remember to love remember that your life is your own

i love you pizza wednesday you bring so much joy to my life i will honor you until i die

what’s it like to not have the gene that makes fake sugar taste like a nintendo switch game cartridge

man asked me to make him a sandwich jokingly and i saw his entire life flash before my eyes

HAPPY PIZZA WEDNESDAY EVERYBODY!!!!!

men in my home pissing me off so bad i’m just telling them to open their wallets

$400 for one medication actually fucking kill yourself

brother brought home a pink redbull for me 🥹 it’s sugar free 😫

my dad getting out of the hospital from a heart attack/open heart surgery and immediately asking for a fast food burger. ohhhhhh brotherrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

can these ppl hurry up please i wanna take my dad home 🙏

father bag is coming home!!!!!!!!!!!

🥰🥰🥰

you don't have to tell me if you ever think of me, i know you see me dancing wildly in fog of your memory

earlier today while i was at a stoplight a man drove past absolutely screaming along to starships

i’m calm

i love my kitties

nighty night bubby

meowing at me to get inside the house to give him attention. diva

mr walter is so snuggly today i love him

i’m a weed sommelier, i walk around the room taking a puff on a big joint and then spit it into a bucket without inhaling and say “red” with an air of easy confidence.