I don’t care if it’s Pete McTighe or Jack Thorne, but whoever the next Who showrunner may be, I’ll bear your children if you make this the version of the theme you use:

Yeah, British politics is simple. You just need to improve public services without any meaningful tax increases, reduce immigration without any labour market impacts, and deliver growth and you'll be hugely successful.

I'm shocked that it turns out the horseshoe is real. Genuinely, the actual hell? 'Bristol anti-racists' offering to team up with... the far right. Genuinely am quite surprised they'd be this explicit

Love this picture (from Steven Ricks Tailoring). Feels... redemptive. Hope Colin knows what a bloody legend he is.

Wuthering Heights reviews making Melania look like Man on Wire.

I tried to take a photo of a grasshopper on my windshield, but now it looks like a gigantic bug destroying the town.

This is mad. They've all gone mad.

Feel increasingly furious about this. Starmer may have made the worst of a bad job, but if he's hounded out of office, it's proof that Britain is no longer governable.

Not sure I'd have the bladder control to do non-cursive.

Also found my grandma's 1982 diary. It's like Alan Bennett writing haikus. Hard not to read in the voice of Patricia Routledge.

Furge thangering muck witchellers rock throbblin' this time o' day Ur bin oughta gone put thickery blarmdasted zones about, gordangun, diddenum? Havver froggin' law onnum, shouldnum?

Attention, telefantasy fans!

He looks like the notepad next to the landline.

Just found an old diary of my dad's in which, in the space of a week, he sees Frank Carson, Norman Collier, The Bachelors, Linda Nolan, Shirley Bassey, The Grumbleweeds, Duncan Norvelle, the rest of the Nolans, Brian Conley, Cannon & Ball, the Hot Ice Show (twice) and then The Grumbleweeds again.

This is great. Taylor Swift taking us back to the days of the entertaining, funny, must-see pop video. Love it. And Graham Norton may well be the biggest winner of all.

You only need to watch 5 minutes of most US chat shows to realise just how good Graham Norton actually is.

Taylor Swift continues to be the classiest act on the planet.

Yesterday I gorged on all six episodes of Mackenzie Crook’s new series, “Small Prophets”. It is exquisite. Why we let anyone but him make any television at all remains a mystery. Monday, 10pm, BBC2. You are in for such a treat.

Strong "the beatings will continue until morale improves" energy.

Paul.Carack is almost certainly playing in your local theatre or arts centre tonight #totp

Gene Pitney's probably younger than you are here #totp

No offence to Marc, but the bit where Gene comes in big still gives me goosebumps. #totp

Sadly, Johnny Marr got custody of the tunes #totp

Bring back Climie Fisher, is a sentence I never thought I'd write #totp

Sorry, turn *up* the sound? For Michael Ball? #TOTP

Pauline Quirke's favourite song, probably #totp

Was quite proud of this. #totp

Rick Astley is 60 TODAY (but looks at least 20 years younger). I've interviewed him for this month's Classic Pop mag, where he reveals his bold plan to shake off his Nicest Man in Pop image. (It won't work) #totp

Sam Fox dressed for a club where you can't get in in trainers. #totp

Steps with a song title that handily doubles as a review. #totp

Kate Stewart, Dr Who and the Rani

<record scratch> You're probably wondering how I got here

Promo pics, then and now.

It would be so 2026 if Keir Starmer - a fundamentally decent, if politically inept, man who would rather be watching Arsenal than hanging out on billionaire's private islands - becomes the only major casualty of the Epstein Files.

“How’s Fergie?”

What's the big problem with kids and social media, is the question social media users without kids are asking.

Just cos I love it and want to share it, here's a video of wonderful Justin Currie and KT Tunstall doing Nothing Ever Happens in Glasgow last year.

You know who I miss? Gatekeepers. Turns out those guys were great.

You had me at a compulsive game of cat and mouse in which a gutsy detective chips away at the prime suspect's veneer of respectability!

Who hasn't dreamed of owning their own TARDIS architectural reconfiguration system orb?

Just seen someone call Keir Starmer 'Keith' - in the space year 2026!

You'd think the BBC might have mentioned this in their extensive Grammys coverage. You know, along with all the dresses and stuff.

"Don't make me go nuclear, Winter"

An unconventional forensic pathologist, you say? Who breaks all the rules? Paired with a no-nonsense, by-the-book copper? This I *have* to see.

It's always the ones you most expect.