They really think we're supposed to believe that Mitch McConnell is lounging in a hospital bed in jeans and a gingham button-up.

Quite the legacy you've left, Senator Graham.

Getting diarrhea like, "Hope this isn't the diarrhea that was on the news"

Look at you! You outlasted Lindsey Graham.

So many drugs out here and all I'm looking for is something to recreate what happened in my brain when my 8th grade crush asked to slow dance to Al B. Sure's "Nite and Day" at the community center party.

I always keep that purple in the tuck for you, dear one.

The idea of a DJ's set being constrained to a very finite and curated amount of music is apparently completely confusing. Because when I'm spinning vinyl sets some people still put their phones in my face and expect any song in the universe on demand.

Graham Platner suspended his campaign by making sure he erased all doubt that he's a piece of shit.

So far I find myself involuntarily laughing out loud at every brilliant Mostafa Shobeir save. 🇪🇬🙌🏼

The most surprising thing about the Graham Platner news is that it took this long.

One thing about a bartender: they can spot a Type

I hope #Belgium have some good chants lined up like Balogun plays Cos the rapist pays and suchlike

Group chat of sports fanatic homies who never give a damn about soccer are all looking like this right now.

My JAM!!! youtu.be/L63piddRti8

Yeah, I've been pretty anti-social this WC but let me gon' ahead and pull up to my neighborhood Salvi-Mex spot tonight and run through some Modelos with mi gente.

Folks last night in Chicago were shooting fireworks towards the Trump building ✨

DC region air quality today is like when all that wild fire smoke migrated south from Canada.

My house is vibrating at a low rumble I'm about 9 miles away.

Black Thought on global television wearing the Black liberation flag while performing in Philly on America 250 was exactly what I needed to see today. ✊🏿

My dogs...

Doesn't matter anything that happens next before the final whistle, Cape Verde already on legend status. And everyone who said expanding the field to more teams would water down the tournament can STFU.

I hate how big companies just don't want anyone to own anything ever again. They'd rent food to us if they could

This is a legit stressor.

Can't even sit on my stoop and calm my nerves with this reefer because these spotted lantern fly nymphs keep crawling all over me. My psyche has linked them with MAGA in the hatred corner of my mind for some reason.

Live footage of me trying to stay off that hopium since those Mamdani endorsed candidates got busy in the NY primaries.

Real ones know.

Have we checked on our European soccer friends overdosing down at Popeyes?

I took one look at that man’s hair and decided to trust everything he had to say about pool and pool related products

My forever FLOTUS speech at the Obama Center opening is tearing me up. I can't get my head around the grace, decency, intelligence and strength of character that we had in the WH before this perverse timeline we've been stuck in since the shit clown came down that escalator in 2015.

Had a nice reprieve from the Satan's taint heat today. Might gotta get smacked and sit in the backyard watching the lightning bugs and bats. Lots of grills going but my neighbor not getting busy bc he'd already be knocking on my door with a plate of carne asada and a cold Modelo.

When it finally happens, it will cement an undefeated streak of him never bearing any consequences for all of the ruin he has caused. I'm still going to party and get shit faced anyway.

Look, if the Knicks winning closed the Hellmouth portal, we could do 1, 2, 3 in a month.

Joyce Beatty is why the name came off the Kennedy Center. Her focus and tenacity... It should escape no one that she's also a Black woman.

I turned on this Freedom 250 UFC bullshit because I either hate myself or I want to see this monstrosity struck by lightning the moment it happens.

UEFA said fuck FIFA.

As long as the Knicks close this series out for the chip, there's no ceiling to the amount of shit talking that New Yorkers are allowed. For at least as long as it's been since their previous championship. They can say anything wild and it will be valid.

I was pissed and embarrassed when DC and Baltimore didn't get any World Cup matches and now that's my only solace because garbage ass FIFA is price gouging every city that is hosting.

Yeah. Extreme levels of disposable income are good at suppressing rage. 😩

Knicks coming out to Ante Up?!!!???

FIFA so evil. This World Cup really about to be more trash than the one that scores of slave laborers died to make possible.

I need New Yorkers to do their big one at MSG tonight. They gotta activate those diaphragms and roar as one unified voice.

Y’all remember all the “the white house is going to be so ghetto” jokes when Barack nem touched down??? Funny to ya girl!

As a live audio professional, this ain't funny even though NBC has a bigger tech budget than me. Taking off my citizen and former journalist hats and speaking as a sound guy, this is the type of shit I have clauses in my contracts for. He really stomped that lav like a roach.

Looking like a cheap ass county fair …

"Tupac's Estate" means Tom Whalley.🤷🏿‍♂️ Afeni Shakur (Tupac's mom) hired Tom Whalley to manage his estate. Then Afeni Shakur passed away too. Tom Whalley hired himself as manager of the estate, and paid himself ~$5.5M.😮 Tupac's surviving sister, Sekyiwa "Set" Shakur sued Whalley for embezzlement.

The Fred Rogers Production has started uploading every episode of Mister Rogers' Neighborhood for free. www.youtube.com/@misterroger...