Wild that there was an open lane called "what if we just explain things clearly to people?" and he's the first one to ever fill it

refusing to write “lmao” because mao only took ws

you guys aren't ready to hear it yet, but Joe Biden

I went offline for 3 weeks and instantly formed meaningful connections in the real world. What a concept.

Actually just gonna uninstall for at least a month. Peace.

Pokémon strikes me as the very epitome of soulless corporate “art”

Probably gonna delete this account for the old mental health. Tell me how much you love me while you still can.

I hope the world explodes I hope that we all die We can watch the highlights in hell I hope they’re televised.

People who say "I was today years old" when sharing a piece of new information to them should be prosecuted under the Online Safety Act.

Post a perfect album from the 90s

It’s okay to not fw retro games

Being leftists is being right too early. Example: I said in 2019 the mcu needed to reboot after endgame. It took almost seven years for other people to also be right.

The YouTube video I’m watching keeps playing the discord message noise and i only talk to one specific person on discord so my heart keeps skipping every time i hear it. Not cool, please don’t play with me like that.

RIP Bill Clinton and Donald Trump. You two would’ve loved 15 Minutes by Sabrina Carpenter.

Social media became way less fun when old people leaned how to block accounts

Even if i agreed with critical drinker or thought he knew what he was talking about or that his content was any good or that he wasn’t vile i still wouldn’t be able to watch his videos because of the way he speaks

This is not an insult, I’m just saying sports people very much are just nerds

I think extrajudicial murder and ethnic cleansing are quite a bit more impeachable than comparatively run-of-the-mill corruption.

in 2026 they should make a place where you can consistently read a bunch of funny posts again

“Lemme just get this toothpaste back in the tube real quick”

This is a real problem and it’s actually ageist that i have to deal with it! No i am not interested in any solutions!

I forgot that i added “phd in eating pussy” to my bio when i was stoned

Going from Sucker’s Prayer by The Decmberists straight into SEE U DANCE (feat. Rebecca Black) by Joey Valence and Brae is a banger playlist to be sure.

I wanna love somebody but i don’t know how I’ve been so long lonely and it’s getting me down I wanna throw my body in the river and drown I wanna love somebody but i don’t know how

Hades is so fun but the writing and characters are unrepentantly obnoxious.

Laughter does not equal endorsement.

SELL IT TO WHO, BEN?? FUCKING PUMAMAN??

Resident evil VIII is such a massive step down from VII so far

Why does every villager in resident evil village have an American accent?

If you held an event for anything other than sports on Christmas, everyone would invariably be like “really? You have to do this on Christmas?”

There’s a big neoliberal fetish for saying every homophobic person is gay and therefore it’s okay to be homophobic to the people we’re assuming are gay. Not that being gay is bad! But they’re bad and gay! And it’s okay if you’re gay as long as you don’t hide it or something.

RFK: “Where did all this autism come from? It never existed when I was a kid!” “A Christmas Story”, a 1983 movie based on a 1971 memoir about a childhood in the 1930s: “This is my brother Ralphie. He has a ton of sensory issues and behaviors we don’t understand. Every family has a child like him.”

Guy sitting on a pile of gold: "im all for Universal Healthcare, but how do we make it happen? Be realistic."

[somberly] You cannot serve both god and money [upbeat music hits] Until now. Introducing god as a service

Ladies and gentlemen, Santa has passed away.

Post through it Alan

The full spiked 60 Minutes CECOT package, clean & subtitled. 1/5

Imagine making a living out of being contrarian and convincing dipshits it’s the same as being smart.

Chubby squirrel

There’s nothing i love more than looking out my window and seeing a little critter doing his thing.

The shit my mom texts me about is so funny

The 60 minutes people just need to air the CECOT piece withiut approval. There’s gotta be some way to sneak it in. Do your jobs.

*strips of flesh cling to my bloodied fingers as i continue forcing the square peg into the round hole* 2026 will be my year

The CBS 60 Minutes Doc confirms what we knew: The U.S. is currently using our tax dollars to imprison brown people with no criminal record in torture camps overseas. It’s no wonder administration shill Bari Weiss pulled this off the air: www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjY7...

I’m seeing a lot of posts from adults talking about how they hate animation. If an only assume you’re trying to seem above-it-all and impressive but it’s so lame to write off an entire form of art because you’ve been told it’s childish.

Fart