Lindsay Lohan turns 40 today. Good for her.

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hello! if you are reading this in Los Angeles, London, Liverpool, Birmingham (UK), Brighton, or Manchester, consider seeing my standup show live in your town this month! chrisgrace.live

can’t believe a narcissist is being so publicly humiliated by a reflecting pool

Seriously. If you can’t manage the correct form of your/you’re or there/their/they’re, your dumb.

The concept of “Heaven” makes no sense. All the “best” “kindest” “nicest” people go there - yet none of them have any empathy for those being tormented in Hell? Not a thought or care about others in misery. Those don’t sound like good people to me. So how does that work?

Damn, my algorithm really wants me to make a bunch of fucking ugly little rugs.

I’m rewatching the “live action” Beauty and the Beast for the first time since seeing it in theaters and oof, Emma Watson is kind of a black hole at the center of a very drab movie.

Happy first day of PRIDE MONTH!

I’ve been doing pretty well at shutting out politics. I’m really at the point where I can’t, and don’t, care anymore. It’s the only way I’ll survive - and as I’m not going to survive anyway, why not just turn it off and enjoy what I have left and not worry? It’s been good for me. Thanks cancer! :)

I’ve made out with a Pulitzer Prize winner.

we're baaaaaaaack at Edinburgh Fringe @jongracey.bsky.social

Check out my Blood on the Clocktower guide for new players playing Trouble Brewing. Once the players pull tokens, send them here while you set up the game! chrisgrace.com/blood/index....

Are guys still painting their nails? I feel like I saw it everywhere for 2 months then it completely stopped.

I heard fireworks go off in my neighborhood and immediately ran to my phone to see if he was dead.

.

There is no McTry.

Everybody rise! Happy Easter

They fired Bondi lol. Can’t wait to see what skeletons come out of her closet now.

My fellow writers might not want to hear this, but AI is a useful tool for certain aspects of the craft, like for instance when you’re engaged in the process of being a talentless shitbag hack who is too lazy to do any fucking writing.

The Whale and Porpoise, Ft Lauderdale FL. 199…5?

I’ve lost over 200lbs and I’m willing to bet that a lot of what remains is simply boba.

Burn it all to the ground. #NOAI

Some may say that AI is the future whether we want it or not so we might as well use it. I reject that wholeheartedly. If we reject it and the companies that use it, take our money and focus elsewhere, and voice our disgust for it openly, we can beat it back and out of our lives.

🌿 💚🤍💙💛🩵💚🤍💙💛🩵 🌿

Hey PALM SPRINGS area friends: I need a few days away from hospitals and stuff. Anyone have a spare room I could crash in for 4 or 5 days with my big ol oxygen tank that I need to breathe right now? No need to feed or entertain me. Happy to sit and rest and stay out of your way :)

Why isn’t he dead yet?

@benschwartz.bsky.social on Fonda, big media and the Committee for the First Amendment - “Fuck it,” Fonda says. “If there’s enough of us who stand up and resist, and we can make that contagious, we’re going to win. This country does not want to be taken back. We want to move forward.”

Guess who had a brain tumor radiated this morning?

Andrew Lloyd Webber’s The Phantom of the Opera IS. NOT. AN. OPERA. It is a MUSICAL that has elements of opera in it. That’s it. It’s a musical. Calling “Phantom” an opera is like calling “The Olive Garden” authentic Italian food.

Every one of these ice warehouses need to be converted into low income apartments when this is all over.

The cool thing about the crazy long run time of The Sound of Music is that you can skip the last 40 minutes and just watch the ending in real time.

Yet be well assur’d You put sharp weapons in a madman’s hands.

It’s actually FEWER Misérables

Love his music. May he rest well.

The funny thing about having stage 4 cancer while the world is on fire is, horrible things on the news seem to matter a whole lot less to you.

This prick again. #ArtOfTheDeal

no war but class war. Working class people that have more in common with their "enemies" than their leaders dying for rich freaks that tell us what we can't afford and can't have. No healthcare, no housing, but bombs forever to extoll the imagined might of weak men and make the rich richer.

7 years ago today I was in Adelaide Australia meeting some of the best guys I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. Unfortunately I have zero pictures of us

GET LOUD PEOPLE. THIS CANNOT STAND.

this bill is legitimately a three-alarm fire. if they manage to define trans existence as explicit then there is nothing stopping them from genocide. i need every single cis person talking about this, calling their reps, getting out in the streets.

Folks, I’m beginning to think he’s maybe not such a nice guy.

Tonight TCM played “Gaslight” opposite The State of the Union. That’s some next level trolling and I love it.

21 year old kid shot and killed at Mar a Lago this morning. Not sure of details but he was armed.

AMAZING

So SCOTUS, with its fabricated-out-of-thin-air immunity doctrine, has actually made American presidents less accountable than LITERAL royalty.

Hmmmmmmmmmmm