I think oomf is obsessed w me

I don’t check notifications, notifications check me

Made someone laugh because I was cute and adorable. I will be riding this high all day. Thank you

Gays at every family gathering:

Hey! WHAT?! Listen

I’m not the king, but I AM part of the royal family of typos

EASTSIDE GIRL

Qwinwah

happy mother’s day to me, who gave life to 20,000 posts

Good morning boyfriends! I hope you are having a lovely time :)

mavis beacon like....that's mother right there

I should pick up an accent

hey nice weekend you’ve got there, be a real shame if it was a great one

Me on my wedding day (probably):

gm

If I was a pokemon in pokopia my ability would be litter and I would drop rocks 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

LinkedIn is such a wild place I must say. Not a fan but a necessary evil I must say

Now why do I get a good feeling?? Hmm???

Really fuxing with this latest muna

I love going for in person interviews fuck this zoom shit my vibe is best experienced in the flesh

We are so back 🖤🔥🖤

I’m just not feeling it today (getting better but still sick and tired 😪)

we should invest in studying the phenomenon of new englanders all asking each other “how’s ya motha”

I love Clodsire. Fav pokemon I think.

I grew up with Steve Jobs, Johnny Cash, and Bob Hope. Now there's no jobs, no cash, and no hope. Please don't let anything happen to Dusty Ray Bottoms

H8 being sniffly and coughy

You reading my skeets on an intercontinental flight:

I’m flying intercontinental w you :)

Yall are short! (cute)

quang quang my baby shot me down

Okay, ya I’m sick :-/

Awww you’re so pretty!!

Would love a Dutch grilled cheese right about now

My show is on

Hehe getting data for free 😈

Cousin had a baby and here I am skeeting

Mattress shopping today!

I offer these services

I am once again asking this of myself (yesterday was chest day)

I think I wanna go gay camping by a lake

I’m not one for commenting on celebrity fits… but I shall make an exception… Hudson baby… you should maybe fire the Hair, Makeup and Costume team you used for the Met

Omg saw a gym bf (probably straight) at the dispensary!

Everybody’s spirits

thinking abt boys

What will I lift at the gym today?

Me and whoomf?

Mmm Celsius yum

My brain is still ten stops away.

that does it, i’m NEVER flying spirit again 😡

wake up babe, it’s time to run amok