My “not involved in sex trafficking” press conference is raising a lot of questions already answered by my press conference.

Nobody has ever looked more like a president getting fired by the board of regents

Trump is a malignant narcissist whose admiration for Hitler is driven not by his anti-semitism, but rather for the way that Hitler has captured the enduring attention of the world. Trump knows he won’t be beloved. His only path remaining to secure his legacy is to become history’s greatest monster

I really, really want to be wrong about this.

Armageddon is terrible, but our only other option was diversity trainings at work.

Was feeling melancholy, but then I dug up Theoden with an undercut from my vault of memes

Each one of those three missiles costs 33% more than the annual budget of the national park where I work.

every single one of these fired losers will sycophantically praise trump on the way out and as soon as he dies will claim they were fired for being the only person in the room to dare to stand up to him

Operation Straycat Coyote

Where’s the lie?

introducing a bill requiring all students to learn how to make the cool S

If your president requires non-stop participation trophies, he might not be the tough guy you imagine him to be.

They canceled his citizenship interview and he drove in the winning run to beat the US. Eugenio Suarez is a gem.

Imagine saying those things in front of the court. Imagine saying them to yourself. You couldn’t live with yourself. These people can, and that ought to chill you to your bones.

They’re telling me a great empire will be destroyed if I attack Persia. Even the oracles who don’t like me very much, very nasty, they all said to me, “Sir, it’s one of the great empires, and it’ll be destroyed. And all because you attacked Persia.” That’s what they’re telling me.

Stupid asshole is going to nuke Iran.

when it’s time to whip gop votes

Now that the u.s. treasury is buying oil futures down, the downside to protracted Strait of Hormuz closure has now gone from “politically suicidal” to “recession-worsening” to “western economic collapse” So that’s cool. But hey, great news for global warming in that case.

Wordlebot can go to hell for giving me a zero for having a good vocabulary. Why should “sisal” not be on equal footing with “shoal” in terms of probability?

Becoming increasingly convinced that we’ll see offensive use of a nuclear weapon before 2028. The ultimate narcissist will, ultimately, decide to take all of us down with him. That is, unless, senescence does for us what must be done.

deleted his tweet as soon as an actual war popped off

Mainstream religious messaging growing up: “If you do a single bad thing, you will go to hell forever.” Talmud: “If a thousandth part of a single angel is ready to testify for you, you will be spared.”

Jersey Girl. This one I had never seen before. I’m honestly struggling to find the hate for this. Affleck and Tyler are their traditional wooden selves, but even that starts to fit like a worn shoe after a while. The dialog is earnest and not overly clever.

Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. Too many gay jokes by half. I can’t be certain, but I think it even felt that way in 2001. A very problematic “pull your dick out when she’s sleeping joke” i get that it’s within character, but with a natural charisma like Jason Mewes, you need to be responsible.

Dogma. Probably three too many gay jokes for modern ears, but otherwise, this was enjoyable at the time, and even moreso today. It would be easy to write this off as an ode to Smith’s Catholicism, but it’s a deeper film than that. Guilt and redemption filtered through a fun, caper farce.

Chasing Amy. Now here’s on that probably walks the wrong side of the line on modern mores. A lot of the “gay” in this movie reads as pretty tone deaf to my modern ears. That said, viewed as a product of its time, it’s a pretty earnest movie about friendship and sexual history.

Mallrats Extended Edition. Honestly, I can see why the added scenes were cut, but they do add an explanatory framework to both Svennings’ behavior that adds some dimensionality to the film that was otherwise missing. The soliloquy is worse here. Sometimes it hits, but mostly doesn’t.

Clerks Extended Edition. I hadn’t seen this since the late-90s and it mostly holds up. It’s a personal film, but held at arms length by inapt soliloquy - but they are still tight enough to be snappy. The animated funeral scene is jarring enough to warrant its exclusion despite its expository value

For no reason in particular, I’ve started watching Kevin Smith’s oeuvre, some for the first time. Thoughts to follow.

They never found the guy. Presumed dead.

On Thanksgiving, the immigrant children held at the Dilley detention center gathered in the gym for what they thought was a holiday feast. The kids salivated over a spread of turkey, sandwiches, pastries and pies, a family told me. But the food wasn’t for detainees — it was for the staff.

Happy birthday to one of my favourite haters, Charles Darwin

This is your regular reminder that in the year 2000, Paul Rudd, with frosted tips, appeared in the Hong Kong film GEN-Y COPS as a bad guy (kinda). In the movie, he does martial arts, fights a robot, and, most shocking of all, does an entire scene in Cantonese.

“I went to the pedophile island with my wife and children” is, perhaps, not the sterling defense he might have wished it to be.

! @weratedogs.com com goes beyond what you've already heard about the Ring Cam ads and includes excellent reporting about ICE and, less surprisingly, about finding lost dogs

Charles Baldwin COOKED when he designed the Biohazard symbol. Legible up close and at distance, conveys a visceral sense of danger. 10/10 no notes

I tried to take a photo of a grasshopper on my windshield, but now it looks like a gigantic bug destroying the town.

It doesn't get any more CRIMINAL than this. In an effort to not contradict the bald-faced lies of the pedophile president, JD Vance, Stephen Miller, Kash Patel, and Kristi Noem are involved in a massive cover-up and scrubbing of the COLD-BLOODED MURDER of Renee Good. 😳👇

Virginia State Senator Louise Lucas is just a delight on every level

I do not have verification that this memo draft is real but if it is....the very fact it's written prior to an election even happening raises so much. So...the orange shitgibbon can see into the future now?

Jfc. Hang the billionaires.

Washington Post Begins Sweeping Layoffs www.nytimes.com/2026/02/04/b... Seems kind of odd to not mention their rightward lurch

Ah, here comes the PR campaign for Omni-present surveillance

The funny thing about a certain type of angry conspiracy guy is that they’re literally being confronted with an elite paedophile ring and a tyrannical government at the same time right now, and because it isn't being done by the people they wanted it to be done by they’re all being pussies about it

The devil, despite your impulse to intercede on his behalf, advocates for himself quite well, actually.

The Markiplier situation with Iron Lung shows just how efficiently movies can turn a buck into two, but the entire industry is on fire because no one wants to just get rich, they want to turn fifty cents into a billion.