Stop the Irony press! We need to get Alanis in for a complete retool!

All you need is a phone app, a little insider information and you'll be laughing your way to Hawaii in an hour.

I was doorstepped by our local Labour councillor last night. Their main message was "fiscal responsibility". Which is... well its exactly what a Tory council would be messaging on, isn't it?

Supreme Court Overturns ‘Right v. Wrong’ https://theonion.com/supreme-court-overturns-right-v-wrong-1819573211/

King Charles in Washington. A triumphal articulation of the chasm between British and Trumpian values. Trump reduced to the petty political pygmy that is his real essence.

Yeah, its not so much that the UK is ungovernable, more that the veil on the filthy state of governance had been lifted ever so slightly

Can't really see how AI in its current form can adequately replace jobs. Its like having an assistant that can read quickly and sound confident, whilst otherwise being as thick as two short planks. In fact, a perfect metaphor for our times

Particularly beautiful vibe in London tonight. Partly the clement weather, partly all the people wearing their marathon medals while taking in the sights, partly the queues waiting to be photographed with a red phone box outside Parliament, but mostly just London being a uniquely brilliant city…

The amount of misinformation we’re getting about an incident that just occurred in front of 1,500 news reporters is truly the metaphor of our generation.

On top of everything else... www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news...

RFK will be hoping the vetting procedure for entry into the Master Race is as flexible as Starmer's ambassadorial appointments

The point of AI is to replace consensus reality, the one we create together by talking to each other going and saying "do you know what I mean?" with one controlled by a few rich people, coz we'll* all go to the AI blob to ask, "is that true?" (Yeah yeah, NOT YOU, you're special and immune)

I'm a senior civil servant and my job is keeping naughty secrets from the Prime Minister. Tee hee, I'm so mischievous!

Almost everything we argue about is a substitute for the thing we should be arguing about: the immense wealth & power of an oligarchic class, which captures governments, ruins lives and wrecks the living planet. This class redirects our rage at scapegoats. To resist its lies is to resist its power.

The market top is in lads

Me, diligently trying to ascertain exactly where the vetting procedure for the Ambassador to the US went wrong

It is such a shame. Imagine what a wonderful country we would have now if only civil servants had told Starmer about: * The advantages of, and support for, EU membership * Palantir * Reform's lies * Press ownership * Quality public housing * The untaxed billions * Privatisation failures * FPTP 😒🙈

If anything epitomises the decay of 2020s politics, its the saga of poor Olly Robbins. One can only imagine the shit that guy had to put up with as chief Brexit negotiator under the Tories. Returning to the fold under Labour, he was presumably delighted some grown-ups were back in charge.. 1/2

Exactly so: nobody ever liked these awful people or wanted much that they were selling. They were imposed upon the public by our awful media class, who wanted someone to destroy the horrible dirty hippies they despise, and they were not at all fussy about who they used to do it.

Holy shit, I have NEVER been more excited for a movie.

Is the NHS calling me zesty, or its portal?

Shy Trump supporters: "Well, at least with Trump there wont be any more Forever Wars" The Trump administration:

Things you hear near a research hospital and also near an Al'Quida training camp.

Just catching up with this Clavicular thing, and im now convinced that the rise of the Manosphere is directly linked to the demise of club culture and these goons thinking that doing Xanax in a roped off VIP area somehow makes them cool

This all makes sense once you realize they’re not trying to govern successfully. They’re trying to steal as much money as possible and damage our country so much we won’t be able to go after them. 🫩

I'm sure nobody profited on inside information whatsoever. And they're definitely not gonna sell it short when they get the signal to dump. #holyshitthestockmarketisariggedfuckingcasinoforgrifterstorobhardworkingpeopleblind

I don't care what anyone says, for 1983 this was fucking dope youtu.be/TkgpunQgvUE?...

“Brexit betrayal” - oh for god’s sake.. Every day, we’re paying to be poorer. We’re paying to be second class citizens on our own continent. We’re paying to queue. We’re paying for more red tape. We’re paying to be less secure and less trusted. Brexit IS the betrayal. And so is defending it.

Open the books, Mr prime Minister!

Paging Dr Trump MD PhD 0BC

Iggy must have made some kind of Fausian pact. I think it we'll end up with a Highlander-style face off between him and the orange antichrist

👀

Let me guess, its the herald of Baphomet in the background isn't it?

I know the term "cargo cult" gets thrown around a lot these days, but it really is a cargo cult. Keep going through the motions and hope one day the people that know what they're doing show back up

America, you really don't need the Epstein files. You already know the truth. 😕

The BBC, ITN and others always take their jumping off point as "The President said" or "what does he mean by". Sorry, but it's all gone now and it just makes your news output sound stupid. #r4today

Guys, I know the Pope is meant to be God's anointed representative on Earth and all, but an even Greater Power doesn't like him mmmmkay?

From new Hungarian Prime Minister Péter Magyar's acceptance speech tonight. This is the absolute BARE MINIMUM platform for any Democrat running for President in 2028.

They just don't build fascists like they used to youtube.com/shorts/QFmKi...

Don Corleone reminds all lesser crime families that if protection money is to be paid it must go to him www.bbc.com/news/live/cn...

As little as I already thought of the man I'm in awe of what he's accomplished in 15 short months. Historic run. Basically threw away all his fire extinguishers and told every firefighter in town to eat shit, and then set his house on fire. We need a separate Mount Rushmore for morons

Artemis actually achieved something extraordinary. Rather than just announcing something that will never happen

After being duped and robbed blind by multimilionaire real estate scion pretending to be a normal person, millions of ordinary Americans will be queuing up to be robbed blind by multimillionaire media scion Tucker Carlson. Jesus Christ, I cant stand it

Half of my computer work time is spent trying to find and update my passwords. Half is spent trying authenticating my log-in

Nothing will be OK until we have a sane person running the world and no good purpose is served pretending otherwise.

This seems to have disappeared from @theguardian.com online comments pages (tho a piece from Nesrine is still there). If you haven't read it yet, just do.

I now see why we need to pay seven figure bonuses to retain these sophisticated geniuses

The contrast between this incredible photograph and the president's words today is honestly too much to bear. The best and the worst of humanity, mere hours apart.

Australia will be relieved they got the convicts rather than the Pilgrims.

You can still be shocked can't you, even after years of this shit. That sentence chilled me to my bones. To see an American president say that. To see him boast about it.