Didn’t have “this is free speech but you shouldn’t be employed anywhere if you’re going to say that” on my fascism bingo card x.com/acyn/status/...

Worst death imaginable for an Italian: “contaminated guacamole”

War pugs

Someone in Nebraska loves you, You’ve got an enemy in Pennsylvania, and if Netflix is any clue, Someone you know in Montana is a murderer

New flying fear unlocked flip.it/.q1xLp

son: your dad jokes are stupid me: they're not "technically" dad jokes son: what do you mean? maury: *clears throat*

It can only ever get more insane the moment a government gets in the business of deciding who gets to look a certain way in public. The law will only get more and more absurd and contradictory.

The best part? It will only cost one billion quintillion kajillion dollars (a real figure) flip.it/f9s.N2

By coincidence, Jizz Lane was the name of the street I lived on during my teenage years, but it was pronounced “Ga-lane”

Why indeed?

An *MRNA* vaccine developed by *Israeli* scientists?! This won’t lead to any conspiracy theories at all…

Pssst… I’m starting to think Bob might not be Mr. Vylan’s real name…

If they didn’t want to be ambushed, beaten, kidnapped, robbed, confined in squalor, starved, framed as criminals, separated from their children, tortured, and sent empty-handed into an active war zone on a continent they’ve never visited before, then they should never have come to this country!

Osama bin Luther: flip.it/4B6eA-

Mike “The Shitbag” Lee getting ratioed by MAGA on the hellsite over his plan to sell off federal land 😂🤣😂🤣😂 x.com/senmikelee/s...

In Russia, whistleblower “accidentally” fall out window In USA, whistleblower “tragically” commit suicide

It’s because all the kids are going to Harvard and majoring in Lesbian instead of going to a trade school and learning banana construction.

The mainstream media, the pharmaceutical industry, OSHA, the fire department, the Deep State, and the Toxic Substances Control Act of 1976 don’t want you to know about the health benefits of drinking hydrofluoric acid

i don’t think the way to persuade women to have more children is to have a possessed baby floating around their home

A lucky few foreign children will be selected for an all-expenses paid trip to Libya, where they will use their OM skills to (a) construct an eye mask out of dust and cigarette butts; and (b) dig a 727km tunnel under the Mediterranean to safety in Malta. What a great opportunity!

“Secondary partners” sleep like lemurs by underclinging to the arch frame

This brazen attack on a treasured American landmark must not go unanswered. The US must immediately respond in kind, by crashing a 1908 Model T overloaded with American soldiers into the Alamo…

Another one bites the Musk!

Peter Thiel really been growing JD Vance clones in his lab! This one was defective, deactivation imminent… #haleyjoelosment

BREAKING: White House offers $1000 to immigrants who submit to lethal injection

Love this for him!

ICE is doing this to children because the media won’t report their names due to privacy concerns, so it’s less likely for them to become a cause celebre

My account is now untrusted

Mehmet Ali Ağca rn…

Not many people can say they murdered the Pope…

Then they came for Arabs for Trump… flip.it/.p6UKl

…the President had discussed the idea both privately and publicly for “heinous, violent criminals who have broken our nation’s laws repeatedly,” as well as gay hairdressers

So they do pay taxes

Your “low-risk” stock portfolio: worthless after multi-day market crash Crypto investors: “Fartcoin is the ultimate diversifier”

“Because I want to bankrupt universities by making international students to pay full tuition afraid to come here” www.cbsnews.com/minnesota/ne...

Senator Chris Murphy took 11 Bluesky posts 4/2,3 to explain what Trump is really doing with tarrifs. This doc has them consolidated with no changes.

woke is when equations

BREAKING: Citizens of Heard and McDonald islands have issued a statement after trump's 10% tariff.

Attorney General Seeks Death Penalty For All UnitedHealthcare Customers

Counting down to R’s calling her “Satan Crawford” in 3…2…1…

Wisconsin hates Elon so much it could be one of his kids.

This, this, and this

We can’t ignore that what our government is doing isn’t really deportation anymore. When you think of deportation, when the US has deported people in the past, it’s been sending people back to their country of origin. Disappearing people to a concentration camp in El Salvador isn’t “deportation.”

Foreigners in the US, get out while you can

Not satisfied until Musk’s net worth goes negative!

LEGAL DISCLAIMER: Every single one of my posts is sarcasm, so it means the opposite of what it appears to mean. Unless of course, the opposite of what it appears to mean would be illegal or threatening, in which case it means the opposite of that. youtu.be/JcOfFeKXcd4?...

he's obviously getting some work done over this brief recess but I prefer to believe he ate a bee