Me IRL at the eye doctor RN

"When I was young, my ambition was to be one of the people who made a difference in this world. My hope is to leave the world a little better for having been there." And he did.

I want to see the Spider-Man movie where he buys his web shooters on the Shop app for $39.49

Kimmel seemed to do what he could to diffuse and unite while not refraining from pointing out the illegality and hypocrisy of it all. I don’t know what more he can do. Speaking truth to power. Robert De Niro as mob boss FCC head was inspired lol.

i am seriously begging democrats to bring the same smoke to this story that they brought to jimmy kimmel being indefinitely suspended

Mark your calendars, y’all.

Current status: chill AF

Even my Taco Bell Diablo sauce is mocking the rapture today

One of my favorite fun facts is why the TMNT are named after artists (it’s because the type of turtle they are is a “painted turtle”). I told my nephew about this and he immediately replied that there should be a Bob Ross turtle. So rather than explain the renaissance movement to him, I-

Do I believe doctors, scientists, and decades of research or believe a walking cadaver and his leather goblin sidekick?

We have always been at war with East Excedrin

My rapture outfit

It renewed some of my faith in humanity to see Tim Booth singing off stage and from deep into the crowd. On this track he welcomed joyous fans to dance onstage as the whole place sang in unison. James - Sometimes live at First Ave, Minneapolis 9/21/25 youtu.be/tTBqJsK1xJw?... #DJDizwire

So yeah the James show last night kicked ass. They played the whole album Laid plus some newer stuff including this banger "Heads" that's as relevant today as it was when it was written during the first drumpf regime. forgive the shaky zoom but we had a good view: youtu.be/EjcJgODjoN0?... #djdizwire

hearing the exterminator begin the waspocalypse so we can exit our front door again is giving me hope. squirrel exclusion is set for wednesday. rodent exclusion friday.

I just found the pics and they still make me laugh. I don’t even know if the purple wall still exists, but just remember Schmoofy licked that wall any time you get a pic by it. RIP

The day @schmoofy.bsky.social drove all they way to the middle of nowhere in Alabama only to discover that the pallet of Star Wars Coke bottles had been completely sold to eBay resellers will go down as one of the greatest days in DisTwitter History. 2020 Turkeys: touringplans.com/blog/s6-the-...

It feels really weird to see @schmoofy.bsky.social go. He has been a real mainstay of DisTwitter for as long as I can remember. His sense of humor will be missed. Rest in peace, and fuck cancer.

Somewhere, Bret is licking a purple wall in the sky (IYKYK). Rest in peace, sir. Thanks for the laughs, valentines & wonderful pics. Your randomness and goofiness were matched by your appreciation for the parks. I probably should have said “hi” the one time I saw you IRL at the Contemporary.

Hot Peppers are getting close to picking🌱!

Agonzalocaris and Opcamillia #paleoart #muppets #cambrian #gonzo #camilla #anomalocaris #opabinia #snibetysnab

I need to see Ratatouille: Legacy (2018) lol

No Jimmy Kimmel? Not interested.

Go buy one and help a great cause! www.nakatomiinc.com/blogs/news/k...

My wish for today is to share big one of these with most of my government

Overhauled the office decor and cleaned up the desk a bit. What’s decorating your space?

I was today years old when I discovered that iOS Apple Music app not only has lyrics you can read but you can also turn down the audio’s vocals to make it a karaoke backing track 🤯. Touch the lyrics and adjust in the microphone slider.

Can’t wait to finally see this band tomorrow after listening to them for over 30 yrs. Laid got all the attention but this song has been one of my favorites from that album. www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejU5... #djDizwire

“Reason and Emotion” was made by Disney during WWII, about the danger of letting emotions take control. It depicts Hitler’s rise to power by manipulating Germans' emotions through fear, sympathy, pride & hate. It was nominated for an Academy Award & later served as inspiration for Pixar's Inside Out

There goes the First Amendment.

This cultivar was bred by a buddy who named it “Lemon Let Die” and the tips are loaded with early flower sites in week 3 of flower

We’re into week 3 for the flower tents which means these should start slowing down their growth spurt soon. I supercropped some now (a bit late tbh) l to hopefully give the signal, “hey dummy slow down the growth before you grow past the light”

The veg tent is like a plant 🌱rec center for teenagers or a plant purgatory for plants who don’t have anywhere better to go (ie flower tent) but they’re not really living their best life because there’s not much to do in the mean time other than sulk and wait and fill all available space

🤔

I want Canadian lake life in my life. 😍

North to Alaska by Johnny Horton followed by the worst new age Muzak I’ve ever heard.

It may not be much but it feels good to take $360/year away from a company that caves so easily to censorship when faced with illegal FCC demands. The harm to their brand goes even deeper than ABC expected.

Y’all, this soundtrack FUX.

Bahahahhahahahahshshshah Gasp Bahahahahah

CARAMEL APPLE EMPANADAS ARE BACK?!?

flexing on coworkers by revealing my knowledge of ancient HTML table cell tag attributes like some sort of ancient sorcerer

Absolutely no notes. Don’t believe me, ask the dishes!

Can I just get one normal day to focus on my own little problems

I stand with PBS. I stand with NPR. I stand with Stephen Colbert. I stand with Jimmy Kimmel. I stand with the First Amendment. PERIOD.* *Also #ReleaseTheEPSTEIN_Files

I’m doing my best, Peloton

BREAKING: Universal Studios announces a new attraction will replace Race Through New York with Jimmy Fallon. The new attraction will be Race to Escape Fascism with Jimmy Kimmel

The squirrel scratching in the wall this morning sounds like they’re penning a very strongly worded letter to their squirrel congressman.

Please go to support.abc.com and "submit programming feedback", tell them to reinstate Kimmel. Takes about a minute. Let's flood them.