every transition timeline be like

protip: if youre ever running late and shopping at the berkeley bown and realize you forgot to do your skin care DO NOT PANIC STAY IN LINE you dont need to wear a bag over your head even if there are hot moms nearby why you ask? the skincare aisle has testers for EVERYTHING 💅

heres to estrogen, the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems

im at the techno party im literally having a nightmare im at the combination techno party nightmare yeah she was there too

The current moment in tech is loosely understood as software guys getting so evil they made hardware guys discover Marxism from first principles.

the only thing that is real and important is community mutual aid. everything else is set dressing.

friend asked to crash at my place last night, we went out, she ended up very visibly too drunk. i got her home safely, fed her t-bell, put on ds9. and me and her and everyone else around us saw a girl taking care of another girl... and goddammit if that isn't what this is all for, you know? 🥺

It's indeed possible to beat bad things backed by big money

i should dye my hair again i bet that would fix me

my favorite signal feature is you can type in an emoji and it shows you which of your stickers are tagged with that emoji:

anti bedtime leftist club

im bored and want attention should i: - post sluttier photos - become a dj - larp as an edgy anarchist - acquire a gang of sycophantic minions - start some Drama - embark on a successful and fulfilling career as a grifter - steal $10,000,000 - shoot a healthcare ceo - develop a personality

saw FEMTANYL in sf last night 😻🤩🤯 killer show, hella baddies in the crowd, like four different people were recording on a goddamned 3ds...

if the lyft is a tesla youd best believe im vaping inside

i want to anthropomorphize ai as like a girl who's really smart and knows a bunch of stuff but also she's a teeeeensy bit crazy so she gets excited and confabulates, over-promises, confirms your biases, makes shit up, sounds way more convincing than she has a right to.... wait SHIT

happy buy a trans woman a birkin bag day 🥰

Happy International Transgender Day of Visibility! We're everywhere and we're cool. Here's the trans pride flag 🏳️‍⚧️ on a mid-90s Pentium running DOS.

okay idk how that would work really and it doesn't exactly sound fun, but on the other hand if she pulls out some holst 👀👀👀

i like my women like i like my 90's post- acts : complicated, wanky, inaccessible, full of esoteric math references, "progressive" but will kill u if u say so, has done way more acid than anyone but kinda over it all now, bass-heavy, featured in rock band 2

disclaimer: i reserve the right to change any of this at any time without warning, and attempting to project authorial intention onto text is fundamentally a fool's errand, meaning is constructed contextually through dialectic, don't you dare cite this post @me

cheatsheet for texting tess 💖: cunty, vaguely flirty without being approachable, one step down from 💅. 💜: warm, friendly, caring, not especially sexy or romantic ❤️: start lighting candles and pouring red wine 🧡: game recognize game, fellow dyke 🖤: goth, witchy 💗, ♥️, 💞: felt cute might delete later

*orange tube amp distortion maxed out, slams power chords* IM DUMB SHES A REPUBLICAN

lets hear it for violence amirite ladies

i think if you're a bartender at a gay bar and a trans girl comes up to you to close out, you maybe shouldn't ask for the first name on the tab. just a thought!!!

least surprising paper headline of the day www.science.org/doi/10.1126/... this is very fluffy and i'm going "wait you claim to measure this using reddit posts" but the headline appeals

BRAZIL WOULD NEVER

“HAHAHAHA YOURE GAYYY! YOU GAY GAYING GAYLORD!!! GO GAY SOME MORE!!” *turns back to microphone* “And that’s why I would like to lead the Democratic Party.”

being polyam is when you have all of your attachment issues activated at the same time by different people in the same polycule & the more confused & turned on & not communicated with you are the more polyam it is

Luanne James is a hero be like Luanne 🩷

unlearning male socialization is hard sometimes. for example, many of us are taught that it is considered rude to stare at a girl's rack.

*googles "was slavery legal in 1948"*

they're all weak little pathetic submissive bitches who yearn to be put in their place

not sure if ur gay? here just watch this real quick lmk what you think

the feminine urge to add all 4096 of my friends who all, like me, seem depressed and lonely and believe everyone else hates them to one big beef squashing groupchat/orgy

as i gather, the generally preferred method to navigate daddy issues is through kinky sex with problematic individuals, right? does anyone wanna tie me up and yell at me about my latex formatting while i cry? maybe that would fix me?

ever get in a Mood, look up your ex's socials, see she's clearly chopped now and doing nothing with her life and youre sad but feel a little vindicated too well yeah me either that would be horrible my exes are thriving but LET ME TELL YOU WHAT my phd advisor hasn't published since 2018. bitch.

Democrats need to win the comment war on AllRecipes dot com

NOT NOW, HOME OF THE LARGE HADRON COLLIDER CERN www.newscientist.com/article/2520...

theonion.com/fbi-uncovers... this was from 2014 lmao

BREAKING: Hamas tortured a one-year-old, burning his leg with a cigarette and inserting a nail into his leg to pressure his father to make confessions... UPDATE: I'm being told it was actually IDF soldiers who did this to a boy. Never mind, forget I said anything. It's fine...

the skills i learned in the many years i spent torturing undergrads with linear algebra show up in just the darnedest of places

No exaggeration, I think this is one of the most important stories in US health care. MAHA makes a lot more sense if you see it as a hostile takeover by the quackery industry

bimbophobic smdh

i want to be in a real big city not whatever the fuck nimby ass pseudo woke retirement community for hipsters hell we got here

"look on my works, ye mighty, and dis pair!"