YAY

GOOD MORNING FAGGOTS

even better to be just a little guy who likes head scratches like me and @twinkdog.bsky.gay

sorry puppygirl bottoms but this is what peak little spoon performance looks like none of you are on @twinkdog.bsky.gay's level and that's okay

i twink, therefore i am

@twinkdog.bsky.gay thanks for trying! i'm still not fixed but maybe another 9000 hugs and i will be. everyone else, be like extra. he is a happy little guy.

poodle. or whatever my gay-ass rescue dog @twinkdog.bsky.gay is. girl poodles are the same. don't ask me why but i know. i know they yearn for that sweet sweet masculine embrace. bernese mountain dogs on the other hand? they're all about the ladies. the girls are huge dykes. i don't make the rules

solidarity with the doggo community here, fireworks are like the LITERAL ONLY TIME my sweet chill little stoner of a dog extra (@twinkdog.bsky.gay) gets anxious and barks. DRONE SWARMS ARE WAY COOLER ANYWAY.

GENDER IS A SOCIAL CONSTRUCT UNKNOWN TO DOGKIND

this post is brought to you by @twinkdog.bsky.gay who wants to remind you that you deserve to take up just as teeny tiny of a cute little enclosed space as a cisdog like him does

why yes i did just use klarna to purchase @twinkdog.bsky.gay a cozy little cave bed from instagram even though he has multiple perfectly good dog beds already no sorry i WILL be needing that sliding scale notaflof ticket any questions

🥹🥹🥹 my blåhaj needs some more aquatic friends!! rn she is mostly in a confusing queerplatonic relationship with @twinkdog.bsky.gay

the cat kind is wonderful!! but i loooove my weighted blanket. i don't sleep on it in my bed but i spend a lot of time under it on my couch when i'm having Feelings. my smol doggo @twinkdog.bsky.gay also looooves to get under it with me 😍

even if this sounds like who you want on my team you should probably reach out to my roommate @twinkdog.bsky.gay unless you specifically are looking for cube knowledge or sex otherwise i've got nothing on the master

i'm literally soooo beautiful and charismatic and perfect if i only had thumbs and Executive Functioning like my friend tess here it would be so over for y'all i would eat all the steaks and also save america

celebrating neuroqueer pride by sunbathing next to tesseract's mostly-dead plant and pile of unread radical transsexual literature #goodboy #ally #ideserveatreat

THANK U BESTIE tess is NOT kidding here guys but fortunately for xem i am EXTREMELY CLINGY

DAMN RIGHT IT IS

i twink, therefore i am

i'm literally soooo beautiful and charismatic and perfect if i only had thumbs and Executive Functioning like my friend tess here it would be so over for y'all i would eat all the steaks and also save america

this is what i look like btw i forgot my rainbow leash for these Walkies but hopefully it is very clear from my appearance that i am very gay and very proud!

is Bodie single? lemme just say ...woof. sorry for some monday morning thirst everyone but it IS pride after all! also @tesseract.bsky.gay hasn't filled my bowl despite me making cute eyes i am being oppressed

terfs have such dark horrible souls that even total lapdog snuggle sluts like me would bark at them and refuse to cuddle. this is a very big insult in littledog world, usually saved for cats and corgis!!!

okay as long as they let me be the chief poppers inspector we can agree to peacefully coexist

what can i say, plushies go nuts for me

THATS RIGHT EVERYONE ITS MY BIRTHDAY YOUD BEST BELIEVE IM THE KIND OF TWINK WHO CELEBRATES THAT SHIT FOR LIKE A FULL MONTH MY NAME IS *LITERALLY* EXTRA I EXPECT A PARADE AND LOTS OF DELICIOUS MEATS @bsky.gay

GOTTA GO FAST

TAKE IT FROM THIS MIDDLE AGED GAY WHOS JUST AS CUTE AS HE WAS WHEN HE WAS TWENTY TWO IN DOG YEARS: this doesn't work for you humans. sorry. this is good advice @youths: because you cannot stop twink death; he kindly stops for you youtu.be/yrQHOuAMzG4?...

ok so this might sound a little bit racist and you might try to cancel me but HEAR ME OUT OKAY CORGIS ARE EVIL THEY ARE MEAN TORY DOGS FRIENDS WITH THE ENGLISH ROYALS AND ARE COPS WHO STEAL SAUSAGES FROM CHILDREN ok i would do the last one too: im a middle aged gay i HATE kids, LOVE sausage

did i get some FOLLOWERS?? hello my best friends!! i love you forever unquestionably and would love to respectfully snuggle in your laps!!

what can i say??? i'm all about bumpin that bumpin that bumpin that little snoot into your face when it's time to go Outside!

i would do anything for treats i would do aaaaanything for treats i would do aaaaanyyyyythiiiing for treats but i wonnnnnntttt take a bath

why am i following the communism kirby account and then like five pages about dogs and not a ton else

according to Science letting a small dog sleep under the covers in your bed makes your boobs grow an average of 1-3 cup sizes. you don't want to leave those kinds of gains on the table (the couch?)

"e is magical" "e made my tits get huge" "e changed my life" ok sure sure sure BUT what about "e wants to eat your sandwich"? "e wants to go Outside" "e needs a little boost so e can sleep in the bed"?? HUH???

happy star wars day everyone here is me as a jedi!! /these are not the chips you are looking for/

I HAVE BEEN SAYING THIS my middle aged gay ass can't be drinking tap water like a common poodle

um so is there a hormone that makes you tall enough to reach the delicious food that @tesseract.bsky.gay leaves on the table just to torment me because if so sign me up i have a Need

i'm literally a triple taurus the stars have spoken i need the Fancy Treats like if you think @tesseract.bsky.gay needs a better job to get me a gucci collar. xe can get a matching one but you all know i'm the Fashion in this relationship

did u guys know that if your CHA is high enough you literally don't need anything else we call that tiny dog maxxing you all put way too much into INT and that's why you're sad

my goddamn hippy bestie @tesseract.bsky.gay FINALLY got my hair cut now i can be beautiful for all of u again. please clap!!1!

my goddamn hippy bestie @tesseract.bsky.gay FINALLY got my hair cut now i can be beautiful for all of u again. please clap!!1!

NOT A SINGLE ONE

sometimes life is hard for cisdogs too! whenever someone meets me they're all "OMG LOOK IT IS CUTE MUCH LIKE A SMALL HUMAN BABY" bitch when was the last time you saw a baby? you literally hate children. STOP USING ANTI DOG LANGUAGE if you meet a human baby, go "OMG LOOK IT IS LIKE A BALD DOG"

me too!

ok i am doing a poll: if you are one of ten local puppygirls please respond. should @tesseract.bsky.gay a) take me for walkies now b) do computer homework c) take me for walkies now and ALSO give me a little treat

Pls donate to the send-extra-to-japan-for-spa-day fund!!

hello! i am just a little guy who loves to lie down on some blankets and take a little snooze and go for walks and meet other dogs and eat some little treats sometimes and curl up under the covers in The Bed for snuggling every day. surely none of you can relate!! you are all busy with your taxes

RUDE I AM RIGHT HERE YOUR GRUNGLING NEEDS ARE MET

me: HOO BOY WOULD YOU LOOK AT THOSE LITTLE PAWS MEOW BABYGIRL her: ... me: how are you doing tn sexy me: you are SO VALID YOU ARE A CAT i love cats me: i dont have any single problem with cats me: chases u, PLAYFULLY her: *runs away, swipes at my little face* me: SLUT. i am TRYING to be an ALLY