Looks like I picked the wrong day to distribute lasagne in my hot air balloon.

27 degrees at 10am is just rude.

Looking for recommendations of inexpensive cozy and detective games for my Switch 2 with enjoyable narratives. Things I like: Lake, Oxenfree, Firewatch, Everyone’s Gone to the Rapture, Roki, the PS4 Sherlock Holmes games. Ta!

Has something happened to GIFs? They seem quite... shit. All of a sudden.

Ah, just what I need a few days before I was hoping to launch some new products on my website... FastSpring not allowing me to upload product files and their support telling me that the problem isn't happening. Super.

IMPORTANT: The Dutch invested €595 million annually on urban biking, resulting in €19 BILLION saved in public health care costs alone. That’s how smart governments do the math on investing in better mobility. Let’s be clear— it WASTES public money to NOT do it. #CityMakingMath HT @modacitylife.com

Looking for recommendations of inexpensive cozy and detective games for my Switch 2 with enjoyable narratives. Things I like: Lake, Oxenfree, Firewatch, Everyone’s Gone to the Rapture, Roki, the PS4 Sherlock Holmes games. Ta!

BBC’s commentary on the women’s play-off match is ahead of the picture. During a penalty shootout. Which is interesting. I know whether they score or miss (all miss so far!) before they take it.

The hidden arrow in the FedEx logo is design perfection. Paris Tennis School: Tiens ma bière.

Monsters under beds across the country as the nation prepares to sleep above the covers in this heat.

As a science fiction writer I really fucking resent tech bros for ruining the phrase "artificial intelligence." 80 years of it being all about cool androids and interesting computers destroyed by five years of "Spicy autocorrect making everything shittier for money." NEVER FORGIVE.

My milkshake brings all the ants to my car

Forget all the trophies / charges, my favourite Pep memory is how he pronounces “goosebumps”

If I were picking the England squad today: Pickford, Henderson, Trafford Stones, Guehi, Konsa, Colwill, James, Livramento, O’Reilly, Hall Rice, Anderson, Scott, Garner, Rogers, Bellingham, Eze, Palmer, Gibbs-White Saka, Gordon, Rashford, Madueke, Kane, Watkins

I suspect I can never click on “fewer investment ads” enough on YouTube to ever stop them actually arriving.

Trying to work out which days next week we can potentially take the girls out without anyone getting sunstroke. The mad thing is that last half-term it rained all the time, also limiting our outdoor trips. :P

When will insects evolve to understand the concept of windows?!

“I fits!”

Have chosen a different park bench this morning. It’s mild, grey and with a cool wind. I like it. Ducks are quacking near my feet, in vain. Tomorrow and next week it’ll be hot and bright, and the park will be full of hormones, bums and nipples as the teens descend. Quiet for now. Good.

UP THE VILLA!!!

Wow, I can't believe they made a sequel to Monkey Bus 1!

Something rather sweet about the massive cheer the fans gave Harvey Elliott when he raised the trophy.

That’s the stuff! Absolutely bloody wonderful! Never enjoyed a Villa game more than that. Well done boys. #UTV

Okay. I think I can relax now. #UTV

Wheeeeeeeeeeee!!! #UTV

Oh my god! #UTV

What a goal!!!! #UTV

Ehrmagherd!!! Just found that the TNT channel on my Virgin Tivo box is showing the Europa League final! Get in. Come on the Villa! #UTV

I have been saying wimdy instead of windy for about six months now, without my wife noticing. Is this an achievement? I’ll let you be the judge. Whaddya mean “No”?!

Finding it slightly weird to be watching a BBC series on Netflix and not iPlayer.

I'm doing the Jed Mercurio BBC Maestro course on writing drama for TV and there are scenes where he's talking to a room of prospective writers about the craft. And I'm finding it slightly distracting that one of them is clearly pop star and Eastenders/Grange Hill actress, Michelle Gayle*!

Yet again, bamboozled by Amazon's search function. Type in composer's name, it brings back the results I'm looking for. Add the name of the show they composed for, to home in on it... no results! How? How can you build a search engine to fail like that?

FFS.

Strangely cold, wet and grey start to the day, given the heatwave that’s on its way. Woken up feeling a bit rough, not sure of which of my two “to do” jobs I’ll undertake today: walkthrough videos or script editing. But, I am seeing my best mate at the pub tonight, so that’s good!

Cat checkpoint.

there’s music for literally every activity

Scrappy Doo owns Reach newspapers.

www.maptap.gg May 18 87🎉 94🏅 100🎯 99🎯 93🏆 Final score: 957 A good recovery after not knowing how far round the corner Florida goes.

Hahaha.

Was perusing the Eurovision semi-finals on iPlayer to see what songs didn't make the final. Some good ones as it happened. But couldn't help but notice that the UK was the ONLY country that didn't perform live during the semis. That can't have helped, surely?! Italy, France and Germany all did.

www.maptap.gg May 17 93🏆 99🎯 93🏆 98🔥 100🎯 Final score: 972 Had to post this one, as it’s likely the best score I’ll ever get. :P

Can’t believe the UK finished 11th in every country’s public vote… AGAIN! #Eurovision

Thank fuck for that. #Eurovision

The audience vote is coming! Oh no.

This voting is all over the place. #Eurovision

Well, that was actually quite a fun evening’s music. And now for the voting to spoil it all! #Eurovision

Italy. You’ve let everybody down. #Eurovision

Winner winner Ukrainian dinner. #Eurovision

There you go, Scottish football. You successfully manufactured the exciting finish you wanted but, that nobody else did. Status quo maintained. Bravo. Now an FA Cup between two shithouse teams to enjoy! :P