‬I know it wouldn't be deserved and would destroy the credibility of the Nobel committee, but it would be hilarious if they'd give the Peace Prize to Obama again. Until Trump nuked Norway. But, still 11:10 AM · Jan 19, 2026 Everybody can rep ly

Amazing what ancient people built even though they were all skeletons

Me: *Painstakingly sets up 2 year-old's wooden trains in a track with switches, signals, and water towers* 2yo: *Immediately uses the water tower as a Godzilla stand-in and destroys the countryside* Pretty sure he salted the wells

Showing the kids the classics

An edge-on disk galaxy, observed with the Apache Point 2.5m Telescope in the SDSS survey. It is at redshift 0.008 (lookback time 114.4 million years) with coordinates (179.18411, 32.02177). 42 volunteers classified this galaxy in Galaxy Zoo 2.

I'll tell you what the answer isn't: the fried chicken livers I got from a muffler shop in rural NC near the Virginia border

Daniel Tiger's Dad is singing a whole song that pretty much just tells Daniel to leave him be so he can get some work done lol

Nearly six years since people began working from home and it appears "getting the presentation view of PowerPoint to show on screen" is still an unsolvable mystery for people

Looking at cuckoo clock repair manuals and Amazon has one in audiobook format. Which is the funniest possible format for a 500 page clock repair manual.

Guy who's only exposure to American foreign policy is George Bush s Mission Accomplished speech (and also every single other American foreign policy action of the last thirty years): "Getting a lot of Mission Accomplished vibes from all this" www.washingtonpost.com/business/202...

Burgers should be constructed with the top of the bun on the bottom

Smells like cabbage

It’s genuinely wild that the United States spent decades building an elaborate rules-based international order which de facto cemented its permanent status as the dominant global hegemon, sustained by ideology rather than might, and now is just blowing it all up for literally no reason

My 2026 resolutions are the same as last year: snack less, meditate more, write and produce a critically acclaimed 00s-style europop album

Wrote about slop, extending some recent thoughts from the good @maxread.info

Got a pullman pan for Christmas so I can try and replicate the shape, softness, and crust of store-bought loaves. We started milling our own flour and the kids like the taste but are thrown off by the shape and crust. Not a bad start-- this should make a good grilled cheese! 🍜🍽️

They say imitation crab is the sincerest form of crab

This would legit be so useful. Or like muting words or topics on an account-by-account basis. "I'm ok with people talking about baseball, except for this fucking guy"

* bumps one of the new baby toys* Baby Toy: "Violence!" * stops, looks at toy, kicks it again * Baby Toy: "Violence!" * Kicks toy again * Baby Toy: "VioLINS make music!" Me: "Oh yeah that makes more sense"

Shout-out to my MIL, who will almost certainly keep up her tradition of buying multipacks of random things at Costco, wrapping all but one indiviually for different people but then leaving the final one in the original packaging and wrapping it up like it came that way

My five year-old asked me if a "Robert Sled" was a type of luge and I'll now tell people that it is the formal name for a bobsled

How many people walked up to the CVS counter and asked to buy this before they got sick of it and whipped out the post-its

It’s truly astonishing how many people who are attempting to sell a piece of furniture online do not provide the dimensions. Like…it’s most of them. How does this not occur to you as information a potential buyer will need

200 cookies baked today, ready to do another 200 tomorrow! Mist wonderful time of the year 🍪🍽️🍜

It's officially the minute of the Winter Solstice -- we made it! Every day for the next six months will be slightly longer than the last Happy solstice to everyone except the parents that sent their kid with norovirus to my sons kindergarten class the week before Christmas

Cookie baking day! 🍽️🍜

Wrapping up Shroud by @aptshadow.bsky.social . Once again he finds a way to tell a story I could have read 100 times before in a way I've never seen anyone else imagine it. I don't know how he finds such new and fascinating angles on classic setups.

Where's Norman Rockwell when you need him

At least 75% of my calories are coming from eggnog at this point

🎶🎵All I want for Christmas is a mid-day nap 🎵🎶

My company's CFO wished me a happy holidays on his way out to the airport and I couldn't respond because I had too many sour gummy Christmas trees in my mouth and I couldn't shake his hand because mine was clutching too many (unpackaged) sour gummy Christmas trees

*playing a California Raisins record for a friend* Pretty good right? These are raisins playing all the instruments

I just realized how insane the LinkedIn recruitment messages are gonna get once they (inevitably) start letting AI trawl profiles and automatically send messages

My wife refuses to use our mandolin because she knows how irresponsibly cavalier I am with dangerous things and then see the respect I have for (and terror I have of) the mandolin

I’ve found it’s more visually appealing to just paste in his head at the inflection points

Happy holidays to everyone except the people that join Teams calls five minutes early

My wife refuses to go to Chipotle since she realized they always give me (6'7" man) larger portions than her (5'4" woman).

I’m sorry if you are not rooting for Duke you are not a fun person lmfao this rules

It is time we reckon with the fact that we've made our refrigerators too deep. What is the back half even for except things I will most certainly forget about. Fridges should take up an entire kitchen wall but only be a foot deep

Love to sit in a chair as if I'm lined up against Usain Bolt waiting for the 100m to start

Oh, no, just because you call from Microsoft Teams doesn't mean I'm picking up. I don't care how green my little dot is.

no i do not want to give you my email for 10% off. and furthermore, I don’t think i should have to click a button that says “i’m a dumb bitch” to indicate that. you’re a website that sells blankets and you can’t speak to me like that.

Windows 2000 Professional AKA The 🐐

My overarching feeling while watch the first episode of Stranger Things 5 was, "I don't care about any of this stuff happening," so I don't exactly have high hopes for the rest of the season

My kingdom for a project manager that learns how to use Teams

I was watching a fifth floor walk up in Scotland for a friend so some carpets could be delivered and I tipped the guys a hundred bucks. They thought it was hysterical but I'm sure have given our country at least one atrocity pass as a result.

The street sweeper just did donuts in the intersection in front of our house for like three minutes straight. Dudes rock