it’s a cold autumn day today. my job around the house was to clear a patch of dying plants outside of our house. i listened to metallica’s ride the lightning album front to back while clearing said plants. the patch is now a charred, smoldering crater with little embers still burning.

Where to place your bets heading into Week 8 of NFL action? Secret Base’s picks expert @sethrosenthal.bsky.social has you covered. 💸 SETH SWEATS 💸 brought to you by our friends at JIZVERLO 🤑 🤑 🤑

i’m boymoding too well at work and it’s the primary reason why i want to quit

i know i’m vagueposting about life but i feel genuinely alive for the first time since like may. i can’t catch a break this year so i’m making my own. i’m forging my own future and i’m not letting anyone or anything stand in my way of fucking living for once.

things are happening in my life. fucking *finally*.

i appreciate how canada vs los angeles is a world series custom-made in a lab to piss off the nazis

ok so apparently i needed to be more specific, a visibly queer person came in and i was trying to be nice and smiley but they pretty much ignored every word i said manifesting a *nice* visibly queer person to show up

manifesting a visibly queer person to show up in my store today so i can smile at them and be flagrantly nice to them because today has been boring as Fuck

accidentally summoned bloody mary by repeating my drink order of a bloody mary 3 times to a near-deaf bartender and now everyone at this bar is freaking the fuck out

if i didn’t get internet safety drilled so hard into my brain as a child i would post so many pretty selfies. i’m so much happier with how i look these days and i want to show the world but i don’t want to get doxxed and killed by the anonymous hacker “four chan”

This place kinda felt like 2015 Twitter for a while but now it’s closer to 2019 Twitter, which feels more like home

flip side of this, i am seemingly incapable of catching a fucking break this year

completely useless fact about me, i learned how to count in binary with my fingers because of masahiro sakurai! it’s useful for all the times i need to count to 1023 on my fingers which is never

pro tip on how to cut down your screen usage: have your phone battery suck from using your phone too much so you literally can’t stay on your phone for any extended periods of time

my mom plays a lot of mobile free-to-play ad-riddled ai slop puzzle games, and i feel like i just taught a caveman how to make fire by showing her monument valley

to the cute trans woman in a brewers jersey who came into my store at the mall today, i’m so sorry i couldn’t say hi bc i’m under like 40 layers of boymode at work but please know that my conscience was banging at the bars of my stupid male veneer like this

sleepless in seattle (2025)

JOE BUCK: Welcome to the top of the 47th [Sun rises] [Sun keeps getting bigger] BUCK: yes [World engulfed by flames] BUCK: oh god yes

We don't claim this chucklefuck

had a wholeass existential crisis before 1 o clock so that’s fun

getting a jump start on life by reading through this at 25

2025 has just been me being a chrysalis and slowly but surely improving my life, 2026 is absolutely going to be my fucking year. book it. bet theoretical money on it. i'm gonna be amazing.

thinking about "dry humor", and the resultant implications of wet humor. damp humor. moist humor.

i remember seeing images like this when i was younger and subconsciously took it to heart that getting phone notifications was good. but i’m convinced these images were a corporate psy-op, getting no notifications and having my phone shut up fucking rules

i’m becoming too fucking powerful. watch out www.michigan.gov/whitmer/news...

oh this video rules it's literally perfect

the estrogen in my body preventing me from falling into depression again

they don’t do slop content articles like they used to. i’d take one “does bruno mars is gay” over the chatgpt bullshit you see every day these days

i don’t think i’ve ever been as thoroughly disgusted with a sports team as i currently am with the tigers. disgusted is truly the only word for it.

evergreen post from the twitter days, i’m 10 on the crack rabbit scale this evening what do you mean the detroit tigers are a team that exists

today’s tech quest has been turning off settings that i never turned on! my phone is running so smoothly now since it’s not doing a fuckton of unnecessary bullshit, it’s incredible it felt like i was turning off hal 9000 all the while though, i was just waiting for my phone to start singing daisy

how do people like eating blue cheese. it looks, feels and tastes like literal actual mold

my phone is so much less annoying now and it’s gotten to the point where if i get a single stupid notification from some dumb app or mailing list it’s an immediate orbital strike “yOuR fRiEnDs aRe sYnCiNg cOnTaCtS” shut the fuck up forever get off my phone permanently. delete. goodbye.

I'm aware of what's happening and I'm not planning to comment in any public way on it. I am going to be watching baseball

it’s not raining for at least another week. i could use a nice rain storm coming through here. that’d be nice

fun fact, i have lost 20+ pounds compared to this time last year!

🏈 BAL 40 - 41 BUF FINAL ✅ That's Scorigami!! It's the 1092nd unique final score in NFL history.

i could never spy against the united states, if i ever got caught they could start waterboarding me by playing 2020s country music which would prompt me to spill all the state secrets i know and whatever psychopath cia agent they assigned to me would probably like that shit music too

my combination of watching sports content and also queer content on youtube is making the algorithm think i’m a trans man lmao

friendly gentle reminder that if you go to the mall on labor day you’re a total fucking asshole

yknow it’d be really fucking cool if it rained today

(Provocative images of Swedish Meatballs)

i didn’t have “becoming a metallica fan” on my bingo card for 2025 but here we are

thinking about concorde. miss that plane

how quickly people forget that gavin newsom thought that the best way to start of his podcast was to invite charlie kirk, michael savage and steve bannon back-to-back-to-back while publicly indicating that he was willing to throw trans rights under the bus for whatever reason

Don’t Honk If You Love John Cage