See if you can guess who Kevin is referring to before you check out the beginning of the thread. I'll give you a hint: a previous post suggested that the subject would be cast to play a role in a film, proving that Kevin is funnier than the guy he's talking about.

The FIFA Peace Prize doesn't mean what it used to

When Harry Met Wally...

I'm still writing MMXXV on all my movie copyrights

It's a short walk from mechanics to maniacs.

BRB, currently updating my CV

"What happens after we die?" "I don't know. Why don't we start with what happens BEFORE we die?" "You mean now?" "Yes. What happens now?"

Our Solar System is orbiting the center of our Galaxy at about 220 km/s so in 2025 we collectively traveled something like 7 billion kilometers across the Milky Way. Once in a while, when you have a moment, it’s worthwhile to take a look around, see where you are, and appreciate how far you’ve come.

What the KENNEDY Center used to be… Remember that time Aretha Franklin performed at the 2015 Kennedy Center Honors, paying tribute to Carole King, who co-wrote “You Make Me Feel Like A Natural Woman,” and it brought a tear to Obama’s eye and everyone to their feet? And Carole King’s reaction. Wow.

Let’s make 2026 a terrible year for corrupt fascist racist rapists. And for all their friends and enablers. (It’s only fair. 2025 was their best year ever.)

HAPPY NYE!

Drop something CELEBRATORY 🎉🖤🪅

today is for the ladies to have fun. its new years eve not new year's steve

Please quote this from the time you didn't interact with someone famous. I did not speak to, or even make eye contact with, 2-time Stanley Cup champion and Ukranian Sports Hall of Fame inductee Orest Kindrachuk because he's never been anywhere I've been.

me explaining humanity to space aliens

I've said it before and I'll say it again: The enemy of my enemy is someone who agrees with me about one thing.

I always prefer my chips to be covered in Cheese but apparently it's against Casino rules.

You only hear about Auld Lang Syne. Shout out to all the Neu Lang Syne out there.

Fair warning: My breath is minty fresh.

It turns out this place was much easier to find than I had been led to believe.

One could almost reach the conclusion that some people aren't even trying.

If I were to offer my own anagram of Spider-Man, would it be panderism?

Next time someone says they don’t have to apologize for being white anymore, ask them to tell about the most recent time they were forced to apologize for being white and who made them do it.

Imagine if Stephen Miller hated poverty as much as he hates brown people

True story, kids.

12 Angry Men, 1 Cup

David Attenborough [whispering]: “Like a grain of sand in a vast desert, the predator blends seamlessly into its environment, nearly imperceptible to the naked eye.”

This part of dudebro culture does not get talked about nearly enough.

Misery might love company, but so does joy. And joy throws much better parties.

Literal homicide. I assume at her age she won't be charged as an adult.

How I'm walking out of 2025

Fun fact: There was a period of 16 months - from 26 May 1951 (birth of Sally Ride) through 26 September 1952 (death of George Santayana) - where everybody mentioned in Billy Joel's song We Didn't Start The Fire was alive.

It goes without saying. At least it should.

Make a Bond movie academic The Living Daylights: Thermoregulation in Terrestrial Poikilotherms

Make a bond movie casual From Russia With Seeing Where It Goes

Cream cheese Obama: Let me be schmear

“Hos before hos before hos” — Santa

this year, I'm giving all my Christmas gifts to the richest child in the neighborhood. I'm sure they'll trickle down to all the other kids eventually

And Tiny Tim, who did NOT die, found out that each of us is a brain, and an athlete, a basket case, a princess, and a criminal. Does that answer your question?

My favorite 3 degrees of separation story does not involve Hollywood I worked with a woman who was born and raised in Ukraine, then part of the Soviet Union Her uncle worked at Baikonur Cosmodrome He knew the first few generations of cosmonauts, including Yuri Gagarin, the first person in space

Give a man a compliment He will be happy for a while Teach him to fish for compliments He will be obnoxious forever

He'll be like that singer who I can only see in my PerryFarrell vision.

Fun fact: Canada's postal codes are 6 characters, alternating between letters and numbers. They assigned H0H 0H0 for letters to Santa.

Here's my Christmas Eve Hummingbird Bath. In an era where the horrors will be present at every table, may we find joy in the little things 💗 🪶

CHRISTMAS HACK: If you don't like saying "Merry Christmas” but you don't want to let anyone know, you can be sneaky and say "Meh! Re: Christmas."

Rookie mistake. And for real, what's the point of wearing a cowboy hat if you're not going to use it to catch falling raccoons? The brim keeps your hands at a safe distance, and it's much more stable and secure transport device than a jacket.

Bird puns? Well, toucan play at that game.

post you from a different era

How I’m arriving at the Bluesky Xmas Party

An incestuous dating site called Oedipal Arrangements.