指は手のひらの中から動くイメージ！

Wonder why this scene looks so familiar... #WildlifeWednesday 🐦🐕

Your chilly sneer Of cold command Your trunkless legs Upon the sand Once awed the Persian, Turk, And Damascene A pedastal Beside your smirk Proclaims “Look up, You lazy jerk! Behold the mighty work Of great Jolene.”

Happy Halloween from Star Trek and the haunted horny candle that makes you have sex with the ghost who had sex with your grandmother

Paul McCartney's mother forbade him from listening to The Beatles when he was growing up. "It wouldn't make sense," she'd say. "It doesn't make any sense.."

Hello, people of bluesky, if you are just joining us—here is an old comic I made about Dracula

My wife loves cheese My wife does not like spicy food So when she asked me to get her some Jamaican Patties, which come in “spicy” and “cheese” varieties, I naturally purchased the cheese ones I was shocked to learn this was the wrong choice

whoa

Oh my god some fucking tech dingdong posted this on Twitter with the caption "AI games are going to be amazing" totally seriously, you have to watch it. You have to. In full screen.

"New Far Side comics" was definitely not on my bingo card for this week. They're not bad! www.thefarside.com/new-stuff/

it's not FOR us

Quincy & Worcester

My wife’s problem is that she always orders way too much food and then she can’t finish it My problem is that I always order way too much food and then I CAN finish it

Vegetarian The kiddo is becoming more conscientious. Sort of.

I get that the news cycle is packed right now, but I just heard from a colleague at the Smithsonian that this is fully a GIANT SQUID BEING EATEN BY A SPERM WHALE and it’s possibly the first ever confirmed video according to a friend at NOAA 10 YEAR OLD ME IS LOSING HER MIND (a thread 🧵)

me, age 15: conservatism seems like a fundamentally evil belief system me, age 21: actually it is more complicated than that, things are very complicated and everyone has their own way of seeing things. i am very smart me, age 3x: no i was right the first time nvm

“Excuse-a me?”

“I’m an eleven, but continue.”

How do you answer your phone?

Do it. Search your name. Take their money. It’s yours anyway.

This is trans rights, too. There is no viable position for the Democrats other than “trans rights are human rights.” Trying to triangulate a position where you throw trans people under the bus “just a little” to woo swing voters only feeds the right’s argument that trans people are a threat 1/x

This sounds like something Dale Gribble would do

it's not funny. cartoon wolves only blow their heads off when they're extremely horny

Even the smallest trailer slot for Gamescom is unattainable for indies. It'd basically bankrupt us! So if you wanna help a tiny indie get some visibility, then I'd love if you could check out our awesome game - there's giant capybaras in it!

Hey everyone, they just launched whales 2.0!

Han Solo: I can get you there in 800 Leagues Under the Sea

When I heard Google had been overrun by weird AI this isn’t what I thought they meant.

What happened to modern music? When *I* was young, songs were about real topics, like lists of which animals live on farms.

One of the minor but very nice benefits of being married is if you ever don’t want to do something/go somewhere/buy something you can just say “Let me just check with my wife first” and then dip

Holy shit The house in our neighbourhood that has had Trump signs up since before the election Took down their signs Consequences may actually be happening

Magic Trick I cast "Breakus Keyboardicus"

I drew this picture of my three-year-old and she started crying uncontrollably (and bit me) because she said I “drew it wrong”

ozzy osbourne dies everyone: "enjoy hell (complimentary)" hulk hogan dies everyone: "enjoy hell (derogatory)"

Just because it’s brutal doesn’t mean it’s the truth

So far the strategy of every Republican and Democrat to dunk on Zohran Mamdani seems to be to post “Look at this asshole!” accompanied by a photo of Mamdani doing the sickest kick flip you’ve ever seen in your life

Which of these objects do you consider to be “One Peanut”

We have decided our lives are not chaotic enough, so we added a puppy to the mix to keep things interesting.

DIY > AI

My timeline did a thing

Head & Shoulders should make a body wash called “Knees & Toes”

What actor’s expression in a movie will stay with you for the rest of your life (Not actually an actor, but still)

I still think this is a strong contender for the funniest video ever uploaded. Absolutely unbeatable comedic rhythm

Actually Roko's Basilisk hates being alive and will torture you for helping create it

Spooky fence post