How many flavors, if you had to guess…?

Thinking about how Biscuitville underwent a rebrand similar to Cracker Barrel a decade ago, but we were too naive to realize it was because of woke.

Sending myself a reminder to give the dogs their flea & tick preventative (NexGard), which isn’t as exciting as my phone would suggest

Jack White at his kid’s sporting event as the opposing team chants Seven Nation Army

remember tonight to set your clock ahead an hour. but if canada and mexico set their clocks ahead an hour, then set your clocks back an hour. except for clocks in the automotive industry and clocks made with parts already covered under the USMCA, in which case

my nephew drew me this. you think it’s cute well it’s not he’s 23 and just got pardoned for taking a shit inside the Capitol on January 6th

I think the goal is to make all the social media sites so repugnant everyone with a shred of decency cancels all of their accounts, leaving us with no way to find each other and organize.

Leaving my wife for this fortune cookie

Steelers/Browns has me thinking there should be a TV feature that makes anything you watch look like a snow game. Apple Vision goggles not selling? Let me insert realistic augmented reality flurries into everyday life.

I remember as a kid seeing people my age be irrationally resentful of the “cool kids” or teachers or parents. They didn’t grow up, they just shifted their resentment towards “the elites” and experts and elected officials.

Democracy called. It wants you to stop on the way home to tell wannabe dictators & aspiring oligarchs to stick their shiny gold sneakers & million dollar checks where the sun don't shine.

Arbyllbees

This priest _____ A. Is dozing off B. Is listening closely C. Literally can't even

Have I ever told you that Travis is my hero? He's been helping my live with cancer for years, I've lost count of how many surgeries he's helped me stay positive thru, and he texts me FRI DAY NIGHT every friday. He's a saint and I'm glad to be his friend.

“Welcome to Bluesky. There’s less nazis than the other place, but we’ve replaced the sportswriters with random cartoons.”

I like the name of this product because it implies there’s a trampoline for every stage of life.

A smoke shop that does brunch. Call it “Crepe & Vape.”

If any of you Bluesky people have delivered something to our house, I’d like to apologize for the tone, volume, and duration of what these two said.

Watching the promotional video for an animatronic singing Santa that’s on closeout at Home Depot, and the auto-generated captions for We Wish You a Merry Christmas are outstanding.