I’ve finished a week of nights, I’ve had 4 hours sleep and the boys have won tickets to “Disney on Ice,” so now I have to go to that tonight.

I’m away to bed. Enjoy the daylight, you factory-reject dildos.

I cut my abusive alcoholic Mother off 10yrs ago mainly to protect my children. That isn’t “toxic”, it’s basic safeguarding. Estrangement is what happens when someone won’t take responsibility. Get in the sea you whinging cunts.

Eugh! Cursed timeline. Double Russ

Work yourself to death to pay for wealthy boomers triple locked pensions and send your kids off to die in a meat grinder on the eastern front. And we wonder why people are so easily charmed by grifting snake-oil salesman with easy answers.

I have to go into town.

Your annual reminder to be careful when choosing your fonts.

It is Tuesday

Mumsnet in the streets, Netmums in the sheets.

They used to "laugh and call him names." Now they're all dead

Strong Ancien Régime energy here.

Everyone on here is named Marie AntoiNeti Pot and they are fighting each other

Absolutely love these on Christmas Eve 👌🏻

It is Saturday my Dudes.

Craft afternoon at school. The insta mums made some really beautiful origami snowflakes. The boy and I managed to summon some sort of eldritch paper-horror into being.

One of the local vexillology and mini-roundabout maintenance enthusiasts has fucked himself up falling off a ladder on a lamppost and there’s a Gofundme for him….

If handing someone their arse, was a video clip

Tbf they have a lot in common.

The Instant Pot is the tool of the devil and I hate it with my life. It has decimated my dinner. Fuck it, Indian it is.

Been to see a man about a Turkey.

I briefly considered doing an advent calendar on here, but every window would just be Ian Botham’s flaccid penis. I decided I couldn’t be bothered in the end.

The majesty of Crewe

Took the boys to the posh Christmas lights, whereupon I paid £24 for 2 “German,” hotdogs because I am what most people would call, “a fucking idiot.”

Me, liking your posts.

You’re absolutely right, Marjory, the floor-sugar does taste rather queer.

[Derogatory]

i’m setting you free. i’m releasing you from the discourse

08:26 and we're already on the third email of the day from School.

really went dark for the sequel

7yo: “Is it true babies in France are allowed to smoke?” Me: “Have you been talking to your great grandad again?” Him:

Clearly the Sainsbury’s algorithm knows about my unmatched ability to dry a vulva.

narrator: 50 years ago... me: [nods] in 1945 narrator: in 1975... me: what

"You 'll be visited by three spirits." The three spirits:

Fucking grown men, every weekend. Pathetic.

Just a wee reminder that this is a really good week to donate advent calendars to your local foodbank.

🎶 No more drugs for me, pussy and religion is all I need 🎵

we fight for freedom

I've seen this so now you have to.

Designer: all right Mr. Del Toro here’s those Frankenstein’s monster designs, real sexy just like you asked for. Del Toro: (nodding) this is exactly as sexy as I asked for.

Why did they feel the need to specify “Farm?”

Ricky Gervais is a warning about what happens to you when you become absolutely certain you figured literally everything out in your 20s.

The guy in the green sweater is hanging on for dear life.

Another beautiful, freezing cold, moon free night in the #snow. #weather #LongMynd #ChurchStretton #Shropshire #photograghy #MilkyWay