Chuck Schumer resign bitch

I've resolved to be more energetic in promoting Unwinnable this year. Stories deserve to be read! Readers deserve thoughtful stories! These things should be bullshit-free! In more measurable terms, I'd like to get a new subscriber for every day of 2026. So, ahem: unwinnable.com/subscribe/

Write for our Exploits mag in 2026! If you're new here, Exploits covers our micro-criticism on pop culture. $25 for a ~500-word meta essay and $10 for a ~375-word section essay. More info here: unwinnable.com/submissions/

Let the lights guide you to a peaceful 2026. The first Exploits of the year includes micro criticism on topics like Andor and Yerin Baek plus our monthly horoscope. Buy: buff.ly/ntaZX8t Subscribe: buff.ly/fMT3UIA Read @lizardrock.bsky.social's essay on character creation: buff.ly/SJHPfOI

Thanks to @stuhorvath.com and @saraclemens.com for guest-hosting Techtonic yesterday! Their interview guest was author/illustrator Adam Allsuch Boardman. Full episode: techtonic.fm/episodes/202...

The fact that when you mention Elon Musk people think of rockets or cars or Twitter; the fact that when you think of RFK Jr you think of eating roadkill and brainworms and Nuzzi, and not the fact they have killed incomprehensible numbers of people is an embarrassment of our collective attentions

how do I tell costar that I’ve been happily married for 15 years, it’s been variations on “the person you’re crushing on is thinking of you too” for months and I miss its bitchy reads on my personality

@saraclemens.com hits the snooze button at New York Comic Con 2025:

Subscribe to Unwinnable before the end of the year and get all the 2025 issues free! That's twelve issues of Unwinnable Monthly AND twelve issues of Exploits for five clams. Feed your brain over the holidays! unwinnable.com/subscribe/ (@unwinnable.com)

Never forget that Neo canonically won at #TheGameAwards and immediately tried to jump off a roof.

i stand by this statement every year

"We care about money!" is the most honest anyone has ever been on that stage

Come by the Peacock terrace and get a leaflet, or digitally spread them around online!

One of the many reasons AI can't produce good writing is it can't hate its own writing. It can't think to itself "Maybe I'm illiterate" during the writing process. And that's essential

Quick PSA for your holiday shopping: You can gift any subscription to Unwinnable, which includes Unwinnable Monthly and Exploits! Just email us at subscriptions[at]unwinnable[dot]com with the email you want the subscription to go to. More details on subscriptions here: unwinnable.com/subscribe/

Now that the holiday sales days are over, consider subscribing to @unwinnable.com! Your subscription dollars fund our writers AND keep 95% of the stories they write FREE for everyone. No logins, no hassle, you don't lose access if you cancel. We even do gift subs. unwinnable.com/subscribe/

🗣️ WE NEED A LITTLE CHRISTMAS, RIGHT THIS VERY MINUTE 🗣️

The space

It's a joy to have my first poem with @videoda.me published! Check it out here: medium.com/videodame/in...

Stoked to debut my new comic strip, "Con Artist," a diary comic about my adventures in con-going!

Hey, I bet you didn't hear that Zork 1, 2, and 3 were open-sourced today! …Oh, you have heard. Yeah. Way ahead of me. :) Here's my comments, and some details that you might not have seen. blog.zarfhome.com/2025/11/zork...

Some of the most powerful and well-paid people in the world don't understand a lesson that every schoolchild knows: if you surrender to bullies, they will only bully you more

A new Legend has appeared! We are thrilled to announce that Pokémon will be the recipient of the Andrew Yoon Legend Award at the 15th Annual New York Game Awards on 1/18! Catch the show LIVE in person or online & celebrate 30 years of Pokémon. Tickets: tinyurl.com/yxd9ak2c

I'm losing my mind over how many reviewers are like "GDT's Frankenstein makes you wonder who the real monster is." THAT'S THE STORY! That's the story Shelley wrote!

Bluesky rn

INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE SECOND INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE OVER ZOOM TO MEET MORE OF THE TEAM UNFORTUNATELY, YOU HAVE NOT BEEN SUCCESSFUL ON THIS OCCASION, BUT WE HOPE YOU'LL APPLY FOR FUTURE POSITIONS WITH THE VAMPIRE

Been meaning to brag about this all week – so great to see Videodame and @wordsfromapenn.com back as the Critical Chaser! (PS. Send me all your game poems or else!)

Find tricks and treats galore in this month's issue of Unwinnable Monthly, including @jhensliterature.bsky.social on myhouse.wad, @orringrey.com on Sepulchre, and our regular crew on all things spooky. Buy: unwinnable.bigcartel.com/product/unwi... Subscribe: unwinnable.com/subscribe/

The New York Game Awards is always a fun night, so why not go big for the 15th anniversary and make it a fun weekend?? DON'T MIND IF WE DO

Aaaaand we return from our summer hiatus a little late but with a banger! Here's @jbarnes1926.bsky.social on queer and trans representation in Grand Theft Auto videoda.me/gay-theft-au...

This is a question from a screenwriter who wants to know if it's okay to have AI write entire scenes for him. My answer would be exactly two letters long, which I guess is why I am not an "ethicist." www.nytimes.com/2025/10/04/m...

If you're cold, they're cold. Let your witch in this October with the newest Exploits, featuring writing on El Vampiro, alt metal, Timeguessr and more. Buy: buff.ly/cfuSfmb Subscribe: buff.ly/4LOpl1Q Read John Goodrich's essay on El Vampiro: buff.ly/3qqIhSX

Once again I wanna thank everyone who signed up for Unwinnable during our mellow subscription drive. That's how Unwinnable survives! More subscribers means more writers (and more pay for writers) and more writers writing about what THEY want to write about. Keep it going! unwinnable.com/subscribe/

@unwinnable.com is 5 subscriptions away from the cool hundo we're asking for to make our Politics in Final Fantasy issue a reality!!!! Tell your friends, it's a great deal!!!

Calling peoples' employers in a rage because their tributes to Robert Redford weren't horny enough

We're almost 90% of the way to the 100 new subscribers we need to put a Final Fantasy and politics issue on the docket. Join the fight here: unwinnable.com/subscribe/

Mark promoting Pictures at a Revolution (fantastic book) was the first author event I did at Penguin and he was SO delightful, SO smart, and I thought every event would be like that (Lol. Lmao, even.). Anyway, he has continued to be awesome and this is a great thread

"I just want to say, go birds, fuck ICE and free Palestine," "Hacks" star Hannah Einbinder at the #Emmys

It sucks that CBS' fascist overlords are trying to make a bit out of not letting Emmy winners speak long enough to say any wrongthink out loud because there are some amazing people winning tonight!

We just need *14* more subscribers to get to our goal of 100 new subs! Are you ready to be the hero we need??

(c) the scene where Dracula boinks Lucy on the ceiling

You can avoid this terrible fate. Subscribe to Unwinnable to unlock a Final Fantasy and politics issue once we reach 100 new subscribers. Take your wagon to this link: unwinnable.com/subscribe/

The moment my eyes go wide reading a Chotiner interview ≥ the beat dropping in any given EDM song