"Nuance" meaning "cops encountered a situation regular Americans deal with every single day and responded with murderous gunfire"

LAUREN BACALL: you just put your lips together and blow HUMPHREY BOGART: *holding nintendo cartridge* i know how to get it to work lauren

Oh, but when *I* go to bars and ask women to squat me I’m a creep. Smdh

Hamnet is one of the best movies I’ve ever seen but beware - it will crush your soul.

SCOOOOO DUCKS!

Fake punt!!

Football at 9am…cheers! Sco Ducks!

If you start the Dungeons and Dragons movie at 11:56pm tonight, you will begin the new year watching a really great movie.

I fear I am becoming addicted to pickle martinis.

🎶Pink Platypus, It’s an egg laying mammal, it’s a Pink platypus, It secretes milk without nipples, it’s a Pink Platypus, pink platypus 🎶

[referee makes a mistake in my team’s favor] these are good men tasked with an impossible job and we owe them a little grace [referee makes a mistake that goes against my team] these are corrupt, incompetent, possibly evil charlatans… congress must get involved

NFL Films made this for all of us. A Carol of the DOINKS.

Hey…WHAT THE FUCK??!!

all I want for Christmas is the ability to remotely induce heart attacks in other people using my mind

Get better Pat, we’ll get them next year.

Well shit

This stupid motherfucker.

Filling up a wine glass and taking my dog for a walk.

Lol

Walmart Grinch should be tried at The Hague.

And then I have the see Johnny Depp’s bloated face?

If you can’t catch those you just aren’t a number 1 wide-out.

Elsa Pole absolutely neutralizing Hunter - incredible.

Watching this on repeat

JALEN WATSON MAH GAWD!!

😑

Well fuck

Tommy Townsend sleeper agent activated.

Oh my god Mike Edwards

Big boy football 🏈

I love the effort but I never want to see him try to push Kareem Hunt forward in the pile again.

The worst part is, the offensive line has been holding up. No one can get open at ALL.

Dude

He’s a miracle

I’m gonna say, Pole has held up really well.

Damnit Tommy

There’s ALWAYS someone open for the other team.

I appreciate all that Mike Edwards has done for this team but he’s getting absolutely cooked. Jaden Hicks must just not know the playbook at ALL.

Ummm … gross

My god the officiating in this league is terrible.

My McDonalds app trying to get me put on a list today.

“Maybe we’re onto something.” “How can we tell? We’ve only done this 187,623 times with the same success every single time. Could be a fluke.”

Ranking star wars movies is complicated because there are certain themes that resonate with-- no I'm kidding, in one of them an ewok hugs Han Solo's leg and says "Ay Chihuahua." So that's number one with a bullet

Hell fucking yeah.

Curious… @profanity.accountant

“I was just following otters.”

I’m about to adopt the Bears as my favorite NFC team.