This is like 75% of the steely dan discography

Wish there was a way to trim my ass hair that didn't make my crack itchy for a week

Get his ass kat

When i first saw this notification I thought it said Loose Women of Alaska and I was like "hell yeah I'd watch that"

👀

every load of laundry implies the violence of its folding

Alpha Beta Sigma Omega

Reddit porn posts are so funny. Bro you posted a video of a girl getting titty fucked, and titled the post “imagine titty fucking her”. Yeah dude thats how porn works

Dollars to donuts people are going to have grok leaking state secrets on the TL within a week

Toughen up is our response to people who turn into Pol Pot when they see intoxicated and/or mentally ill people in public, not to the actual behavior itself. Public spaces should be safe and pleasnt isn't the hot take, its "we should make the piss people's lives more miserable until they die off"

The thing is the liberals yelling at you know this. They're not mad because this is true, they're mad because you don't gleefully lap it up like they do.

lmao. you’re telling me the purpose of the system isn’t what it does?

Don't know how i never noticed that my TV could only do 24hz in 4k mode, at least as far as windows was concerned. Switched to 1080p 120hz and by golly do i feel stupid now

Trick question, it is actually the Gary Numan son "Are Friends Electric?"

Spaghetti-os, Hormel Chili

Girls don't snoke Marlboro menthol lights anymore and that's why I'm single

#IJS #BLIZZARD AND SHIT !🙃

*slurring my words* Steely play siri dan

Hes a closeted bisexual narcissist who is addicted to posting, of course we can predict his every move, he's One Of Us

Meeting the woman of my dreams and telling her i want to "lick it til it doesn't stink anymore"

I just watched Alysa's performance. Obviously, great job. But then I decided to listen to the 18 minute version of MacArthur Park by Donna Summer produced by Giorgio Moroder.

Alysia Liu disappoints by not skating to the definitive Weird Al version of Jurassic Park

We don't talk enough about how much of a babe Bonnie Raitt was (and still is) and I blame Reba McIntyre for it

People keep telling me that I got to read theory, pal I studied the socialist diagram.

I've tried to keep it together and keep it quiet but Mrs G and I have had our asses kicked for months and we just found out that her car has a cracked motor block. I'm so sorry but if you have anything to spare, we sure could use some help. Thank you and I love you Vnmo is Scoob84

Alysa Liu: "THAT'S WHAT I'M FUCKING TALKING ABOUT" 🗣️

Wish there was a tall lanky mean brunette woman in my life to make me pilot the dang Eva

when It Happens, David Gilmour & Roger Waters will finally reunite to release the worst Pink Floyd song you’ve ever heard

"return"

bsky.app/profile/katm... They immediately blocked me but dead serious the best schizo post I've seen in years look for Yohann Ocasio-Cortez Foxx in Kat's replies it is Worth It

Please people of god you need to read this thread

Dragonaut

I'm reclaiming my virginity so if any beautiful women would like to be my first DM me

RFK jr won't see your post but your middle age friend who works out all the time just to have an incredibly mid physique will (me)

Eric Tao comparing his whole life to the Mets just before it all collapses For Real is fucking awesome lol I can’t believe they did him like that

Mf looks like he's one of the thirty singers in Pg.99

Why do they keep putting AI bullshit on phones anyway? I don't need gemini to look at Instagram lifting influencers cameltoes or post "need a Lebanese she they with a tragus piercing to ruin the next six months of my life" on bsky

They for good reason don't let me have my phone while I'm at work (lifeguard) so i do voice to text with my watch when i want to remember a post for later

They should do a bonaroo for podcasts Have i done this one before its been sitting in my notes app for a few weeks

Dragonaut

A lot of y'all clearly have never had the pleasure of owning a sick pair of jeans that were worn in just right or you'd understand you can do anything in them

5:30-6:30 PM dinner is goated. just one more thing old people were right about all along

Only wanna be with you -Hootie and the blowfish

I learned about Jesse Jackson when I was 6 when he and Bill Clinton had a beef and I instantly liked Jackson and hated Bill Clinton when he compared Sistah Soulja to David Duke RIP JJ 🫡 If any justice is served over Epstein I will venture to your grave and put Bill Clintons prison photo on it

10 isn't winning on volume but absolutely takes it on endurance. Daydrinking is a staple of coastal southern culture

Personally if my life looked anything like this id quietly sit in a car with the engine running, with a tube running from the exhaust into my face

It sure did suck being unemployed for a few months this past year but as a small consolation prize my income went down enough to get the earned income tax credit this year so I'm getting like 1100 back between federal and state taxes

more like evan dandon't