In one week's time we can say that 100 years ago they had David Attenborough.

*looks at own surname* If you need me, I'll be at Hastings kicking Anglo-Saxons into the mud.

Are Solaris (1972) and Stalker (1979) middlebrow or are they just shorter than Andrei Rublev (1966), the greatest thread in the history of highbrow art, locked by a moderator after 12,239 pages of heated debate

The rules of Fibonacci Club: 1. You do not talk about Fibonacci Club 1. You do not talk about Fibonacci Club 2. You you do do not not talk talk about about Fibonacci Fibonacci Club Club

Obviously I'm as delighted as any athletics enjoyer for Sawe pushing the limits of humanity and finding new heights, but it's also kind of bonkers that our first AND second sub 2h marathons came at London, not Berlin! (Non-marathon nerds: Berlin is flatter) www.bbc.co.uk/sport/athlet...

Morning.

Dog swimming pool. Big swimming pool for dogs.

Picked a great weekend to start reading this...

I remember when Thai sweet chilli sauce landed in the UK halfway through my time at uni and never again did I have a sad, beige meal.

Read the whole thread about the -ive effect of AI on perceptions of little nerd kids, but this skeet hit personally cos I was 6 when I 1st used a word adults were baffled I knew (my teacher hadn't heard of "Benelux", an obscure term for Netherlands/Belgium/Luxembourg 🇳🇱🇧🇪🇱🇺, I'd read in an atlas).

23/30 🪿

We rewatched 'Edge of Tomorrow' (2014) and at about the 70% mark A realised that she had conflated two different films in her memory of it, and no, Jake Gyllenhall was not going to be on a train at any point.

Behold the snake.

Chelsea live in the banter timeline, endlessly.

An interesting aside about the UK monarchy is that we don't know for certain what % of UK citizens are explicitly banned from being head of state because I don't think we have figures on how many Catholics/non-Catholics married to Catholics there are, but it could be as high as 10%.

The biggest problem I’ve found with an all-lesbian bank heist team is that everyone wants to be called Fingers

VERY COOL PERSON: "It's four-twenty, you know what that means?" FRENCH PERSON: "Oui. 80."

Things I studied at university: - Stalinist purges - Enslavement in the Caribbean - An Gorta Mór (Great Famine, Ireland 1840s) + the independence war - Depopulation of the native New World people after Europeans arrived - The Terror (France) This moral panic over universities is pathetic.

The Dank Meme of the Ancient Mariner

we love you neil! 🎶🐀 #myart

Still think Wrestling is fake? Explain this

Welcome back to the Artemis II crew :) Such a huge relief watching them arrive safely!

Honestly, good week for 'Dudes rock' masculinity: 1. Name crater on the moon after your buddy's beloved late wife 2. Have a cry and hug with buddy who just named a crater after your beloved late wife 3. Making huge versions of objects

Reasons this is a (rare) example of a good April Fool: - 100% commitment - Camp - Not mean spirited - Plausible enough for 2 seconds of believability but then you realise the truth - Psych(er)! 100% likelihood that someone, probably students, will produce a real version by the end of the year

Italy continuing their utter dogshit form at World Cup qualifiers, how has it been TWELVE YEARS since they last reached one???

A 2022 survey found that 43% of girls who felt sporty at the end of primary school had stopped doing sport by their mid teens. There are several reasons, but adding in the threat of genetic testing is only going to increase this number. womeninsport.org/resource/ref...

THE GREAT BRITISH SEWING BEE: oh my this is fun, oh what larks THE GREAT BRITISH REAPING BEE: well this is a spot of bother and make no mistake, what on earth

Happy St. Patrick's Day from the Irish Reunification Landline

WAIT it's Dune 3 Trailer Day AND St Patrick's Day? Everyone is going to need a spice bag immediately.

Jesus: and where there are two sets of footprints, that is where I walked beside you Me: My lord, where there are one? Did you abandon me? Jesus: No my brother, it is where I carried you Me: And the constant feathered serpent tracks? Jesus: Well that's Quetzyy

Yes, hello, is that God? Yeah, hi. I have a complaint. You gave me this brain that’s designed for finding berries and avoiding lions and now people are ‘just circling back’ to see if we can ‘move the needle’ on ‘key initiatives’? NONE of those things are berries.

First person, third person, meanwhile all the feral online lesbians are wondering if the fourth Locked Tomb book will be in the second person like Harrow The Ninth was?

Friday catposting.

Aiming to be someone's Irish Summer Girlfriend (only shows up for about three days in August, colder than expected, accompanied by large swarms of insects)

Daily bunny no.3266 is growing every day

Are we keeping a list of the countries at the World Cup who Trump hates, cos current European champions Spain could give us a real moment?

Wow, what a way to find out I have lost my job and I wasn't born in the UK!

Here he is in full.

'Family voting' is like 'grooming gangs' in that the press and politicians who yell about it have no actual interest in dealing with the underlying cause because that is sexism and patriarchal social structures (i.e. white people do it as well), and they're only interested in Islamophobia.

Hannah Spencer walking into Westminster, sucking her teeth, tutting, and muttering "tell you what, you've had some cowboys in here."

I was at the count in Gorton and Denton last night and we all saw Matt Goodwin eat ballot papers. His girlfriend and team begged him to stop but he kept stuffing it into his mouth and making grunting sounds like the Cookie Monster

RIP to a real one

I'm starting to feel sad that none of the tantrums on the Right about Gorton+Denton have sought to blame the shitposting lesbian bloc cos we Green-voted with aplomb yesterday.

As someone who voted Green yesterday and (unlike Matt) lives here, this is my take: the electorate here are leftwing and mostly progressive, and the fact we emphatically returned a Green is a sign of how the parties have shifted, not a comment on the electorate. Cry harder.

Oh Matt, maybe if you were actually from around here you would know what people here actually believe in.

Labour can't remember the lyrics to QOTSA songs, huh?