cats' habits are so funny. for months last year mirah spent 90% of her day sleeping on a pillow on our bedroom floor and then one day she was like, America Is Done With Pillow. and ignored it for months and would hop right off if you placed her on it. and now suddenly pillow time is back in session

rap world

i love when wrestling commentators are like oh my god… this is just SICK. the BRUTALITY of these men. DISGUSTING

we are living in the time of the antichrist, i can spend $9.99 on microtransactions in my phone game. That’s allowed

Saw an ad for M&Ms today and honestly....if you don't know about M&Ms by now you are dumb as fuck

i know i say this on like a weekly basis but… it’s gonna happen

a just and loving god would have let Hilary Mantel live to hear “the pope is weak on crime”

Since we’re all making fun of Rod Dreher, I think about this at least once a week

about 20 people in homestuck cosplay just walked down our street. What’s all this then…

learning about capitalism at the nickelodeon theme park inside the mall

it’s girlfriend friday once again on jewelry tv

gio just exclaimed “oh my god!” with such pure delight that for a second i thought It Had Happened, but it was actually just that one of our favorite neighborhood date spots is in the zohran scaffolding video

i love these guys. “ooh i’m soooo scared of my robot. my robot i’m building is too powerful and it could kill everyone. if i build it too slow it’ll be mad i didn’t build it faster and kill me too!” Girl just don’t build it then

playing resident evil and thought i heard a zombie going “ooouuughhhh…. Nnnnrnghhh…” to my left in the headphones but it was the cat snoring next to me

bought a pristine copy of DISASTER REPORT for the PLAYSTATION 2 at the OVERPRICED USED GAME STORE while DRUNK on the way home from a WORK EVENT and the guy at the store was like Ohhhh. Sony? They don’t remember this one. But I remember

MELANIA: You want me. Out of nowheres. To remind every one. Of my best friend, and child sex monster. Jeffrey Epstein?? (squints evilly) NATHAN FIELDER: (voice over) The First Lady loved my idea.

apparently neopets updated the wheel of monotony to make it so that you can bribe the attendant with neopoints to spin the wheel faster instead of making you have to leave the browser window open for like 12 hours the way you used to and that is everything wrong with the world today in a nutshell

Churchill describing either Charles de Gaulle or your coolest friend after a couple of drinks

i just started playing this and it’s sooooo cool, such a beautiful eerie atmosphere

living in a too-online household is a fucking nightmare “it’s a blorbo situation” “is that the world of warcraft thing?” “are you thinking of glup shitto?” “no that’s star wars. i’m thinking of glorbo”

“these guys think they’re playing crusader kings” theory continues unimpeachable

Nuremberg was an important symbol of German nationhood so I say with 100% sincerity that this is a job for Philadelphia

if we’re sharing the best clickhole space articles, this one has brought me to tears multiple times clickhole.com/this-speech-...

HELLO?

i would no joke recommend that anyone who cares about preserving human effort in publishing and journalism spend some time in the "ai soulmate" spaces online and get a sense of what LLMs can sound like when they're talking to someone who thinks they are like "breathing life into code" or whatever

pinched a nerve in my hand playing culdcept on the 3ds. how many culdcept injuries have there been

My traditional Easter reading, from James Tate.

had to miss easter vigil for the first time in years bc i am sick af so if anything goes wrong in the world over the next few days it’s probably my fault for being impious, sorry in advance

every time i’m like “i should go delete my facebook, i never use it anyway” i log on and see an ai-generated logan paul family tree where he’s two of his own sons and i’m like, you know what maybe i do need this

Romans suffer massive cortisol spike after Jesus brutally resurrectionmoggs them

there are a few particular areas of the floor that the cat has deemed The Battle Zone and if you step there she assumes you want to fight. but it's strictly confined to The Battle Zone and if you take a step beyond those parameters she's like oh okay, intruder defeated

"Your posts are worse than Bieber" "Shirt look like a shop rite bag" "You have sold out the fans ." Every Accusation is a Confession. —DRIL

i appear to have found a confusing youtube channel youtu.be/0CcqAfUgLFQ?...

everytime someone says "my bad" I always get the urge to respond "Yeah. It is your bad." but I'm always scared people arent gonna get that I'm referencing this

this episode of god friended me features a side character who early on mentions she’s celebrating her sobriety birthday with “a 6-pack of lacroix and a smiths album” and at the end of the episode the main character buys her a copy of the queen is dead. But like. She’d already have that

Sorry if I’m not as moon positive as you guys, I thought majora’s mask was real until I was 22

moby-dick, his eyes enormous: from hell's heart you STAB at moby? for hate's sake you spit your last BREATH at moby? oh! oh! the great shroud of the sea for ahab! the great shroud of the sea rolling on as it rolled five thousand years ago!!!!

it's her day

i use this stupid focus app to turn off my social media access at work (sometimes) and usually when you try to pause it it tells you to do a breathing exercise, but today for april fools they replaced the breathing with a flappy bird-style minigame where you’re zuck trying to avoid lawsuits

i fully thought no one was really watching those ai fruit videos and the trend reporting about them was a classic case of “i saw two posts about this so i’m going to write it up like everyone’s doing it” but sadly i just saw a guy on the train watching a video of a cherry sobbing over a kitchen sink

"so erin, what did you do while your boyfriend was away for the weekend?" Well, www.youtube.com/watch?v=ixeR...

closed an old checking account i had stopped using and the bank was playing the saddest flute music while i was on hold. goodnight fallen comrade

local cat has discovered "teabags," "reaching into my mug to try to remove the teabag," things of that nature

PONYO

an important and rapidly vanishing feeling in our public life is At The Mall. we used to have At The Mall in abundance but it’s fleeting these days and you have to seize it where you find it which is why i recommend the margaritas at applebees

they’ve got games on their phone at applebees