New COLLEGE TOWN! Feat. @kevinseccia.bsky.social & Ben Siemon! Hosted by Jan & Beebo (me & Seth Morris!) Beebo schools Jan about bananas as the government closes in! & more! Produced by @scottaukerman.bsky.social @brettmorris.bsky.social @cbbworld.bsky.social www.comedybangbangworld.com

As if the 2025 my-year-in-review-posts weren’t enough (“2025 you were hard but also the best!!!!) now we’re doing 2016?? (“The year that started it all!!!!”) Can’t you guys text a friend?

Happening Now: Students have walked out of school and are protesting against ICE in Saint Paul, Minnesota

Sometimes I’m like, “Uggghh why can’t it be me at the Golden Globes?” And then I think, no, you’d still be dealing with the fallout from being the one to go over and ask Sean Penn to put his cigarette out.

If you’re in line to explain my last tweet back to me STAY IN LINE.

All the gun rights people who claimed they needed their guns in case it became “necessary to the security of a free State…” um this would be your moment.

Every man in Silverlake looks like Zach Galifianakis in various stages of life.

❤️ Wanda Sykes ❤️

You guys remember in Arachnophobia when the giant poisonous spider mated with the common house spider and created an all new venomous and highly replicable spider? I think that’s what we are risking by letting Covid and this bad flu strain hang out so much. Is my science exact? Don’t worry about it.

“wanna feel old?” sure brother, i would love to just feel something, anything

New COLLEGE TOWN is pure silliness w Pam Murphy & Hannah Garcés! Hosted by Jan & Beebo (me & Seth Morris!) Boy moms! Ghost Stories! Ham scraps & more! Produced by: @scottaukerman.bsky.social @brettmorris.bsky.social @cbbworld.bsky.social This pod & many more: www.comedybangbangworld.com

I did not consent to the passage of time.

After stumbling across something called “Swedish Death Cleaning” and reading up I’ve determined it’s essentially The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up but without the spin.

It feels like 2026 should be over by now.

I’m hungry for lunch, but am I ready to be done with 2 of the 3 Big Events in my day? Unrelated maybe I do make some resolutions this year…

Tfw the president of the United States is a landlord

When I was visiting family over the holiday I barely glanced at my phone after Wordle. Now I’m back and I’ve been watching dozens of a trad wife’s instagram reels for an update on whether the piece of glass straw she swallowed ever passed.

FOLKS NEED TO REALIZE HOW HUGE THIS IS For the first time in modern Texas history, Dems have candidates running in every state and federal race on the 2026 ballot. That includes all congressional seats, every state House and state Senate race, plus statewide judicial and State Board of Education.

No, because that’s what white folks especially love to do. And your culture is not a costume! 💖 #ally

Google AI Overviews put people at risk of harm with misleading health advice

Apps are to the Internet as stores are to malls if the stores kept asking you to please enter using their special little outside door and not just going into the mall where everything already is. If @bsky.app had drafts I could make this make sense.

I do not care about having all the information and history at my fingertips, I was fine going to the library or phoning a friend. What I dearly need is to be able to google my brain and life.

People are like, “IT’S OK TO REST RIGHT NOW! LIKE NATURE, IT IS WINTER ANDTHE THAW WILL COME!!!!” Ok but it’s been January in my life for 8 years. What kind of stupid tree am I??

New year, new ✨COLLEGE TOWN!✨ Feat. Mike Leffingwell & Mark Rennie! Hosted by Jan & Beebo (me & Seth Morris!) A feral gift! Single dads! Traveling wives & more! Produced by @scottaukerman.bsky.social @brettmorris.bsky.social @cbbworld.bsky.social www.comedybangbangworld.com

So many apps out there to help reduce screen time but all you need is an app where half the screen is always your self-facing camera making you watch yourself scroll - we’d all quit tomorrow.

Many get sick while traveling. One major reason is they don’t realize mass transit is high risk because airline CEOs lied about viral spread early in the pandemic and lobbied the CDC to lower precautions. To make the most of your holiday, take precautions like wearing a mask when you travel!

NEW Christmas COLLEGE TOWN! Feat. @joewengert.bsky.social @djmausner.bsky.social!! Hosted by Jan & Beebo (me & Seth Morris!) Christmas ghosts, fish horrors & more! Produced by @scottaukerman.bsky.social @brettmorris.bsky.social exclusively for @cbbworld.bsky.social www.comedybangbangworld.com

NEW Christmas COLLEGE TOWN! Feat. @joewengert.bsky.social @djmausner.bsky.social!! Hosted by Jan & Beebo (me & Seth Morris!) Christmas ghosts, fish horrors & more! Produced by @scottaukerman.bsky.social @brettmorris.bsky.social exclusively for @cbbworld.bsky.social www.comedybangbangworld.com

New COLLEGE TOWN! Feat. Ryan Stanger & Ryan Asher! Hosted by Jan & Beebo! Auditions, life coaches, laundromat life & more! Produced by @scottaukerman.bsky.social @brettmorris.bsky.social @cbbworld.bsky.social www.comedybangbangworld.com

Coughing wetly and forcefully out into the air is alive and well at LAX. Want to upgrade? Sneeze directly into the limp gesture of a fist as though you were merely a dainty gent clearing your throat after a a woman said something scandalous.

When water droplets get on the lens during a period movie I'm like "There's a camera in this movie? I'm out!"

a phone that kisses your fingers with its little lips after it spits out the charger

New COLLEGE TOWN! Feat. Mark Rennie & Mary Sohn!!! Hosted by Jan & Beebo (me & Seth Morris!) Dodging the government! Depression era luxury! Cloning dogs & more! Produced by @scottaukerman.bsky.social @brettmorris.bsky.social @cbbworld.bsky.social Subscribe!! www.comedybangbangworld.com

New COLLEGE TOWN! Feat. Mark Rennie & Mary Sohn!!! Hosted by Jan & Beebo (me & Seth Morris!) Dodging the government! Depression era luxury! Cloning dogs & more! Produced by @scottaukerman.bsky.social @brettmorris.bsky.social @cbbworld.bsky.social Subscribe!! www.comedybangbangworld.com

I wish Quentin Tarantino would publicly insult me. It seems like it only does great things for your career!

Everything is depressing but being older than Mark Zuckerberg might just do me in.

not sure how to square ‘no one person can be reasonably expected to pay for every media subscription’ with ‘sorely underpaid writers need to make a living’ but my inclination is not to locate that problem with any of the broke ass people on either end of the complaint

Sometimes, when I’m angry at my phone, I tap-slap the screen like a cat batting a baby’s head.

🌤️☃️🎁TODAY☃️🛍️☕️ 12 - 3

Sorry if I seem aloof, listless. I’m just thinking about how I’m not Scarlett Johansson in giggly interviews with Jonathan Bailey.

Tomorrow! Saturday! Little Art Market in Silverlake! Come do some holiday shopping or just grab a coffee at the cafe and say hi! Lyric Theatre & Cafe 2106 Hyperion Ave 🎁🛍️☕️🥐☃️🌤️

Hey, College Town Kevins! We need some voicemail or email questions/ comments/ hypothetical scenarios to mull over for tomorrow’s recordings! Go to cbbworld.com/callcollegetown pleeeeease daddiesssss

New COLLEGE TOWN! Feat. @hollypraz.bsky.social & @kowalick.bsky.social! Hosted by Jan & Beebo (me & Seth Morris!) Dating your friend’s ex, new toes, & a horrifying Kevin question! Produced by @scottaukerman.bsky.social @brettmorris.bsky.social @cbbworld.bsky.social www.comedybangbangworld.com

Editor: How about “comma uninvited comma” in case readers think the bear was a renter.

The sad song that was playing in my head on repeat *seems* to have been replaced by the baby in the viral video from like 2017 saying “Wasabi?” and I’m really hoping she’ll last the week.

Last night I saw a man up on his roof with a leaf blower just standing and blowing one spot for maybe 15 minutes. And I thought, I could solve his male loneliness with one push.

It’s such a strange feeling to realize I can’t afford my expensive face serum because I spent the money on bombing other countries and Trump’s golf vacations.

The @cbbworld.bsky.social Black Friday sale is live! Ten dollars off all monthly plans. Code: WECARE

This is a fun one with funny people!